


Rejects // Punk Luke Hemmings

by 5sosfanfics



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: Cross-Posted on Wattpad, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-15
Updated: 2016-02-16
Packaged: 2018-05-20 21:35:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 51
Words: 68,001
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6025918
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/5sosfanfics/pseuds/5sosfanfics
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Is it some huge secret? I know I'm a reject," I shrugged as I said the words and turned to walk away. </p><p>Kara Jennings had always stood out among her class. So it was no new thing to her when she moved to Australia. People gave her weird stares and shoved her into lockers for being the "new girl," but Kara was used to it. </p><p>However, she wasn't used to having attractive popular boys pay any attention to her. But Luke Hemmings, the most perfect human being Kara had laid eyes on, was paying very close attention to her indeed. And she didn't know how to talk to a boy, much less him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. >Chapter One<

Art class. My favorite period of the day. The only period, actually, that I liked at all. It was the only period where I could just be myself and not be judged.

Well, if you count just sitting in a corner doing projects that were specially designed for my level of skill as not being judged, then that was true. I'm easily the most advanced kid in the class, and my old teacher knew that. So she made up assignments for me so I wouldn't get bored. Not anymore though.

My thing with art; it started when I was about two. I had apparently loved the shape of my hand, and I had covered my walls in little kid hand prints. My mother hadn't been there when I'd done it, but she wasn't mad when she came home. She thought it was beautiful. So we made a tradition of doing that again each year on my birthday in different colors.

Ever since then, I've been transfixed with the concept of art, finding the beauty in even the ugliest of things. I notice the small, minute details instead of the big picture. The swoop of an eyelash, the point of a leaf, the weave of a basket. I've never liked looking at the whole picture, but I've always enjoyed the natural beauty of everything around me.

So when I moved to Australia, there were plenty of new details to take in. There were new people, new cultures, new landscapes. So much to see, but I never would really see all of it.

My new school was chock full of changes. The whole atmosphere was different. There were new teachers, new classmates, new judgments. I was used to the snide comments whispered loudly as I passed by in the hallway. They were nothing new to me. But before this year, I'd always known the people who talked about me, or I at least had an idea of who they were.

Now that I lived here, I had no idea who these people were. They had no idea who I was. So we were at a mutual understanding of the fact that I'd ignore them while they'd judge me.

Now that I lived here, the teachers had no idea what I was good at, what I struggled with, or if I had a bad reputation or not. So that meant I was stuck doing whatever the rest of the art class was doing. Of course, I already knew those things, so I had a 108 percent in art.

But still, art was my favorite class. It was the one time of day that I could unwind and take it easy as I pushed ahead of everyone else in the lesson. It made me feel good to know that I was a step or two ahead of everyone else. It made me feel somewhat special.


	2. >Chapter Two<

The first two weeks or so went by without more than a few words with anyone other than the teachers. I drifted through the school day, surrounded by people who all seemed more attractive than I was. People who seemed to have no interest in me whatsoever, other than negative interest.

I sat alone at lunch, music loud in my headphones. I stayed in the back corners as much as possible in the classes without assigned seats. In those that had assigned seats, I simply looked only at the teacher, and the people near me carried on as if I wasn't even there.

Every day, I woke up early, dragged myself out of bed, tried to make myself look as presentable as possible, though who I did that for I wasn't sure. I went to school, walking through halls and sitting in classes by myself, my head stuck in my own world.

But one Thursday, that cycle of monotony was broken.

I was sitting at my lunch table near the window as always, Daughter playing from my headphones, a charcoal pencil flying over thick paper, when i felt the table jostle slightly. At first I didn't pay the person any attention, but then a finger appeared, tapping on the edge of my paper.

I decided to glance up, curious as to who would have the audacity of touching my paper.

I was greeted by a boy about my age, with bright green hair and two or three bands tattooed around his arm, as well as an eyebrow piercing and a wide smile.

I saw him mouth something, and realized my headphones were still in. "Pardon me?" I asked politely, removing one and turning the music down a bit.

"I just said hi. I'm Michael," the boy repeated himself patiently. "You must be the new girl. I've seen you around."

"Yeah. I am," I said bluntly. I wasn't really in the mood to talk much.

"What're you drawing?" Michael indicated to the paper.

I'd drawn a blown-up view of a rose, focusing on a single drop of water on the edge of a petal. Within the dome of the droplet, there were upside-down clouds. "Nothing," I said self-consciously. I wasn't used to people asking about my work. I wasn't much for explaining my pieces, even to my mom.

"Sure doesn't look like nothing," he gazed at it intently. "It's beautiful. It looks so real... like I could just reach out and touch it..." he reached out slowly toward the drawing.

I swatted his hand away. "Don't you know the first thing about art?! You don't touch someone else's work, especially not a charcoal piece!" I said, a bit over-protective of my art.

"Sorry, sorry," he looked at me, taken aback. "I didn't know."

I took a deep breath. "Did you need something?" I asked. Surely he didn't just come over here to socialize.

"Nope. Just thought you looked lonely over here, all by yourself."

I looked at him, unsure of whether to feel annoyed that he'd interrupted my art or happy that I didn't have to be alone again. "Uh, thanks, I think..." I said awkwardly. "I'm not really used to talking to other people, so please excuse my weirdness..." I said seriously.

Michael laughed. "Your weirdness? I don't think I've ever heard that before!"

Why was he laughing at me? Did I really say something funny? Before I could respond, the bell rang to go to our next class.

"Do you know where you're headed?" Michael asked as I slipped a plastic cover over the page I'd been drawing on. I closed the sketchpad, gathered my things, and stood up.

"Yeah. I'm off to Advanced Art."

"Really? I just got switched to that class! Would you mind if I, uh, sat with you?" he asked hesitantly as we started walking out. The crowd of people was thick, and we were pushed close to each other. "If you don't want to that's totally alright."

"No, I'd lov-" I was cut off as I tripped over something, falling hard to the ground. My things billowed around me, but thankfully I caught my sketchpad before it got trampled.

I heard a few laughs and whispers around me as I tried to get all of my books and journals off the floor. A figure bent down and helped, and I figured it was just Michael. But when I saw the green-haired boy's shoes quickly turning and coming back toward me, I looked up and froze.

There, kneeling to help me with my books, was what had to be an angel. The boy had tan skin, honey colored hair that was swept up into a quiff and a lip ring. But those weren't the things that caught my attention. What did that were his eyes, clear as glass and blue as the sky, his cheeks, tinged with faint pink, his jawline, strong and angled, the dimple he had on one side, showing with the slight smile that played on his mouth. Oh how I wish I could draw his face. His features were perfect, just begging to be drawn.

There were tattoos peeking out from under the sleeves of his jacket, as well as the neckline of his shirt. They twisted together, the black lines bold against his skin, which was splashed with bit of color here and there. I wished I could see the rest of them, but I didn't want to be weird.

"Here you are," he said, his voice resonating in the air between the two of us. "I must apologize about my friend. He was the one who tripped you. But I'll make sure it doesn't happen again," he smiled and stood, offering a hand to help me up.

Taking it slowly, I got to my feet and looked down quickly. "You must be Kara, the new girl from the States?" he asked in his lilting accent. I could only nod. "Nice to meet you. I'm Luke. I'm sorry about that, again."

"I-It's alright. Thanks for helping me," I looked up him again, noticing that he was much taller than I was.

"No problem. You should probably get to class, Kara. Don't wanna be late," he winked. I nodded and turned, looking at Michael.

What just happened? Had someone like that really talked to me? Did he really just smile, even wink at me? Since when did that happen?

Walking with Michael to Art class, I kept my eyes on the floor in front of me, my mind still on what just happened. All through art class I idly drew on a blank piece of paper, not paying attention to what I was doing.

I ended up making patterns for tattoos that I would never get, but I kept them anyway. I wasn't sure why, but I felt like they'd be useful in the future. That and the fact that they were beautiful, of course.

My favorite was a Phoenix rising from ashes, the flames licking it's feathers. There was also a flower that had delicate petals and stamen protruding from the center. The third was simply a doodle of patterns, twisting and twirling into something unearthly and gorgeous, but strange.

At the end of art class, Michael and I exchanged phone numbers and went our separate ways. I trudged through the day, alone as per the norm, and drove home at the end of the day. But I felt different, as if something was blooming in the pit of my stomach. Did Luke do this? Why was I thinking about him so much? He'd only talked to me once, and that was to apologize! I really needed to get my head straight.


	3. >Chapter Three<

A bird flew out of the smoke towards me. I ducked as it swooped down, reaching for me with its talons. When I looked back at it, there was no longer a bird, but a person. A male figure, walking towards me. His features were indistinguishable through the soot and ash, but I knew he was tall and slender. I moved away, but the figure kept advancing. I lashed out, hoping to scare him off. However, a strong hand grabbed my wrist, holding tight. I saw tattoos decorating the skin of his arm and instantly knew who this must be. To confirm my fear, the smoke around the boys face dissipated somewhat, revealing who it was.

I let out a small yelp, jumping up and clutching at my blanket. There was a cold sweat on my forehead, and the taste of smoke on my tongue as I gasped for air. My room house was quiet and dark, no sign of life other than the frantic pounding of my heart and my labored breathing.

I fumbled out of bed, almost falling as my foot caught in my blanket. I moved to my desk, taking out the first pencil I had and flipping to the first clean page I found in one of my numerous sketchpads, and turned on the lamp on the table. I shielded my eyes for a moment as the lightbulb flared to life, illuminating the space.

I put the pencil to the paper, drawing like mad. I wasn't sure what, but it was like I was possessed, my hand following someone else's orders. I drew the curve of a shoulder, the angles of a jawline, the swoop of an eyebrow, until I finished an hour later.

Looking down at my work, I realized that I had drawn the face seen in the nightmare. Pencil smudges showed the clearing smoke, and behind the smoke was an easily recognizable face.

Luke.

His eyes bore down, seeming to punch through the paper, his lips pressed into a straight line, teeth clenched, hand encircling another person's wrist.

My wrist.

Why had I drawn this? What did it mean? Was I warning myself that falling for Luke would only bring me heartbreak and pain? Or was it something else?

I stood and turned the light off, leaving my things lying on the clean, white desk. I glanced at my alarm clock, and seeing that it read 4:58 am, I crawled back into bed and shut my eyes, praying for some sleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Kara!" my mom singsonged as she opened my door about an hour and a half later. "Time to wake up, sweetie!"

I lay there, motionless as I heard her walk in. She crossed the room and stopped at my desk. "What is this, Kar?" she asked curiously and I heard the rustle of her picking something up.

I immediately jumped up, rushing over to take the sketchbook from her. "It's nothing!" I told her, holding the picture to my chest. "Just... something I drew. It's nothing."

"Doesn't look like nothing," she raised an eyebrow. "Do you need to talk about something?"

"N-no. It's fine mom. Really. Don't worry about it, just something I drew." I shook my head, closed it and put it into my school bag. "Really!" I said as I looked back at her disbelieving face.

"Alright! If you don't want me to see it, I'll respect your wish." She put her hands in the air defensively. "Time to get dressed, school starts soon."

I groaned, but went to my closet, rummaging through the many shirts, sweaters, and jackets. I settled on a gray sweater and some white jeans. Putting on what little makeup I wore, I grabbed my bag and went downstairs, where I then set it back down, and walked over to grab my shoes by the door. I pulled them on as I returned to the kitchen, grabbing the Cheerios, milk and a bowl. I got my breakfast and ate it quickly, then told my mom I was leaving and got in my car.

As it started, music poured loudly from the speakers. I was stopped at the first light on the way to school as one of my favorite songs, Miss Jackson by Panic! at the Disco, came on. I sang along happily as I drove. Reaching the parking lot before the song was over, I sat in my seat and continued to sing until the music stopped.

Smiling, I turned off the engine, gathered my things, and got out of the car. As I did, I felt a pair of eyes on me an looked around. I didn't see anyone who was looking back at me, so I started to walk in. But I still felt like I was being watched.

"Nice dance moves, Kara," came a voice from behind me. I whipped around to find Michael walking towards me laughing.

I blushed and looked down. "Oh, uh, thanks, I guess. It was my favorite song."

"It was so adorable though! You're cute when you're happy," he smiled and walked with me to the school.

"You think I'm not happy?" I asked curiously.

"Well, not that you seem unhappy, just... not interested. Like you already know everything we're learning," Michael said slowly.

"Because I pretty much do. Except for History, I was taught everything at my old school in Minnesota. I never thought I'd be taking Australian History," I laughed and held the door open for Michael. I saw someone approaching from the corner of my eye and decided to be nice and hold it for them too.

"Thanks Kara," came a voice from the tall, black-clad figure approaching. The only other person who, to my knowledge, knew my name. He walked past me to the next door, opening it for me as I stepped inside. "Just returning the favor," Luke smiled kindly.

"Um, thanks. Luke isn't it?" I asked quietly, walking through the door.

"Yeah. I'm surprised you remembered," he raised his eyebrows.

"Why wouldn't I remember your name? You told me, didn't you?" I shrugged.

"True. But you seem like someone who is pretty popular. The names must all blend together!" he laughed.

Blushing again, I looked at Michael, who stood to my left. "I've actually only talked to you and Michael, so the two names I know don't really blend together," I smiled.

"Well I'm glad I could be one of those two names then." Luke smiled back. "I should probably go put my stuff away. See you around Kara." Luke started to leave.

"Okay. Cool. See ya." I replied as Michael and I went to our lockers.

"What was that all about? You looked terrified!" Michael said quietly.

"It's... nothing." I shook my head, still slightly flustered by what had happened. I didn't feel like telling him about my dream last night.

"If you say so," he shrugged. "Hey. Do you want to hang out tomorrow?" Michael asked, looking at me. Tomorrow was Saturday.

"That sounds alright. What time? Where?" I asked, pulling out my phone and going to my calendar.

"What about noon at The Chocolate Koala?" he suggested.

"That's my favorite coffee shop!" I grinned.

"Mine too," he laughed. "Their chocolate croissants are amazing."

"I don't think I've gotten one of those yet."

"Then you haven't lived yet. We're going to get you one ASAP."


	4. >Chapter Four<

The car ride home was uneventful, as usual. I got home and walked inside, putting my bag on the kitchen table. I pulled out my phone, opening up my messages. The school had sucky reception, so I hadn't received the text from my mom until now.

_Hi sweetie. Would you be able to get some eggs on your way home? And if you get home before you see this, let me know. Thanks! Xoxo_

Of course mom would ask me to go run an errand. Instead of texting her back saying I was home, I decided to go out and get some eggs from the grocery store a few blocks away.

Grabbing my keys and purse again, I went back out to the car. Starting the car, I looked in my wallet to see how much money I had. It was enough to get what I needed, and a pint of ice cream.

I drove quickly to the store, grabbing what I needed. As I walked toward the register, I noticed a girl who looked somewhat familiar. I might have seen her in my art class, but I wasn't sure.

She saw me looking at her, and smiled, waving. I waved back awkwardly, before making my way to the check-out.

Placing my items on the counter, I waited patiently as the cashier ran them over the scanner.

"Hi. Aren't you in art with me?" came a soft accent from the left of me. I looked to find the girl from a moment ago. "I'm Eve," she introduced herself and put out her hand.

"Kara. And yeah. I think we do take art together," I smiled slightly and shook her outstretched hand.

"I've seen your pieces. You're amazing!" Eve said breathily. "I've never been very good at art. But I still love it."

"Well thanks. I appreciate that." I was fully smiling now. Compliments to my artwork did that to me.

"I guess I'll see you in school," Eve smiled back as I paid for my things.

"Yeah. See you then," I nodded and left for my car. I drove home, put the eggs in the fridge, grabbed a spoon and my phone, as well as the pint of Ben 'N Jerry's I'd bought, then went upstairs.

My room awaited me, the white walls bare other than a few pictures and posters, as well as a strand of twinkle lights. I missed the hand prints on my old walls. They use to remind me of my childhood, adding new hand prints every year on my birthday. Each year was a different color and a little bit higher than the year before it. The last time I did that was the day before the move here, and I was practically balling my eyes out. I wondered if anyone had bought the house yet, and if someone did buy it, what happened to the hand prints?

I flopped onto my chair that hung in the corner of the room, tugging open the ice cream. I began eating it as I opened my messages again.

Michael's number was listed as I scrolled through my contacts, so I hesitantly decided to talk to him. International texts and calls were so expensive, so I was reluctant to text or call my few friends back in the States.

 _Hi :)_ I sent. Safe enough, right?

It took a minute or two for him to respond, then he said, _Hey. what's up?_

_Not much. Just eating ice cream._

_Lucky! What kind?_

_Ben 'n Jerry's moose tracks <3_

_So jealous!! >:|_

The conversation continued like this, with trivial little things. I'd finished my ice cream before my mom arrive home, and I talked with Michael for a few hours. When I heard the garage door open, I hurried downstairs to greet my mom. Michael had gone to eat dinner with his friends, so I had no one to talk to.

"Hi mom!" I hugged her as she walked in.

"Hi Kar. How was your day at school?" she asked, like any good mother would.

"It was the same as usual. Though I actually talked to two people. Though, one of them I wouldn't really count." I shrugged. "He seems to be one of the 'cool kids', so he probably won't talk to me ever again."

"He? You're already talking to a boy?" my mom raised her eyebrows in surprise as she set her things on the counter.

I blushed lightly. "Actually, they're both boys," I smiled. "One is Michael, my first kind of friend here, and the other is Luke, the popular, dreamy, perfe- never mind." I cut myself off.

"Is he cute?" she asked curiously.

"Oh my gosh, mom... He is the most perfect person I've ever seen..." I replied quietly, getting butterflies just thinking about him. His voice still played clearly in my mind, as if on repeat.

"I think you like this Luke boy," mom laughed.

"I should probably go start my homework," I changed the subject, not wanting to talk about this anymore.

"But it's Friday! You never do homework on Friday." Mom looked at me oddly.

"Well, I can do what I want. It's my homework!" I replied jokingly. "Plus I have plans for tomorrow. I'm going with Michael to the Chocolate Koala."

"Is it a date?"

"No, mom!" I rolled my eyes, grabbing my school bag. "We're just friends."

"Alright," she said, sounding unsure.

Walking up the stairs, I called down. "The eggs are in the fridge, mom."

"Alright. Thanks!"

"Love you. I'll be in my room if you need anything."

"Okay, love you too," she called as I closed my door, collapsed on my bed, and thought of Luke.


	5. >Chapter Five<

"Hey Kara," Michael waved me over as I walked into the Chocolate Koala. "Over here!"

I walked over to where he stood near the register. The café was crowded with the afternoon rush. I smiled as I stopped next to him in line. "Hi," I said a bit awkwardly.

"You know what you wanna get?" he asked, gesturing to the menu behind him.

"Yeah. I usually get a caramel mocha," I nodded. "Plus, I need to get a chocolate croissant." I laughed.

"Yeah. As of today, you will have lived!" he laughed softly. "So we're set then?"

"Yeah," I nodded, stepping up as we were called.

"Hi. What can I get you two today?" asked the guy behind the counter. He had a beanie on and a nose piercing. I'd seen him almost every time I came, and he seemed to be starting to recognize me.

"I'll have my usual caramel mocha, as well as a chocolate croissant," I smiled.

"Mixing it up today, huh?" he joked, punching in the order. "And for you Michael? The regular?"

"Yup," Michael grinned, pulling out his wallet. "I'll pay for yours, Kara. Don't worry," he said to me as I went to pull out some money. He paid like he said he would and we stood for a moment, waiting for our coffee.

"Venti caramel mocha and a chocolate chip frappé?" called the girl behind another counter. I walked over and thanked her for the coffee, then gave Michael his drink and found a table.

"So. Chocolate chip frappé, huh?" I smirked at his girlish coffee.

"What? It's good!" he said as he took a sip. "At least I'm secure enough in my masculinity to drink it in public."

We spent the next two or so hours talking about school, my life in America, and the differences between the two countries. Then we got on the subject of boys.

"So how many boyfriends have you had?" Michael asked as he took another sip of coffee. My own was gone by now, so I just held my empty cup and looked around at the emptying café.

"Um, none, actually," I mumbled.

"None?!" he asked incredulously. "Seriously? I'd have thought you were breaking hearts left and right!" he joked.

"Yeah, well, it doesn't help much when you're socially awkward," I smiled.

"You talk to me easily enough," Michael pointed out.

"Yeah, but you talked to me first. I suck at starting conversations with people who are more popular than me. Which means everyone."

He looked at me closely, eyes scrutinizing my face. "I can't believe people aren't all over the gorgeous new American girl..." he muttered. "What's up with Luke?" His accent made Luke's name sound different than I was used to hearing it.

"Nothing. Just being polite, I guess. People like him don't talk to me. It just doesn't happen," I said and looked down at my cup again.

"Then you must be completely blind, Kar. 'Cause the way he looks at you? It's like you're a new experiment that needs to be tested. And I'm not sure how I feel about that."

"An experiment? Wow. Thanks Michael." I rolled my eyes.

"What?" he said defensively. "I'm just saying."

"We should probably get going. My mom is gonna start worrying," I said, feeling the need to change the subject to anyone but myself.

"Yeah. We probably should go," Michael agreed and stood. We grabbed our trash and walked out, recycling the bags and cups.

"Have you ever thought of dying your hair black and blue?" Michael asked abruptly and gestured to my brown and pink hair.

"No. I never thought of that. Why do you ask?"

"Because I think it would look great on you. The black would bring out your skin tone and the blue would make your eyes pop," he shrugged.

I looked at him and his bright green hair. He seemed to know what he was talking about. "Actually, you're right. The colors would go together. As an artist, I can't believe I hadn't thought of that." I nodded and looked back at the ground.

"I could help if you want. I dye my hair all the time. We wouldn't have to do permanent dye, just the twenty-four wash stuff if you want," he suggested. "That is, if you want me to help," he added quickly.

"Sure. Let me just ask my mom when I get home and I'll text you what she says. If I can, are you free tomorrow?" I smiled at his offer. I figured he would know how to dye my hair, as neither my mom or I could do it and I didn't want to have to pay for a professional.

"Sure. Sounds great. Talk to you later Kara!" Michael grinned as we reached our cars.

"Cool! Bye Mikey." I said as I climbed into my car.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"So what color do you want? Turquoise or sky blue?" Michael asked as we stood in an aisle of hair dye.

"What about both, and I could do ombré?" I suggested.

"Sounds great!" he agreed and grabbed both. He threw them in the basket with the black, and looked back at the shelves. "I was thinking about doing my hair red. What do you think?" he asked.

"What shade?" I asked. "It makes a big difference."

"What about this?" he pointed to a darker red.

"No. It'll look too much like blood," I shook my head.

"This?" he pointed out a bright shade.

"Yeah. I like that. It's bright but not crazy." I nodded as he threw it in the basket as well.

"That's all we needed right?"

"Yeah. I'll pay for it all since you bought yesterday," I smiled as we went to the checkout.

"Oh my. That's quite a bit of dye there," the clerk chuckled.

"Yeah. Three are for me though," I laughed.

"Good. Though I can tell that this one is dying his hair too!" she pointed to Michael, smiling.

"Yeah. I am. The green just isn't doing it for me anymore!" he laughed as I paid.

"Well, here you are kids. Make sure to come back to show me how it turns out!" she smiled as she handed me the bag.

"We will!" I replied, taking the bag from her. "Have a good day."

"You too kids."

"She was nice," I said to Michael when we were outside.

"Yeah. You ready to look totally different?" Michael grinned as we made our way to his car. He decided it would just be easier for him to drive so I wouldn't have to find his house.

"Yup! I just hope it turns out alright," I said a bit nervously. It was nice to have a friend to help me though. Michael had been so kind the last few days, and it was really helping my self-esteem.

"It'll look awesome, I promise. I won't mess your hair up," Michael said and started the car when we were both inside. He drove a beat up Subaru, but it was still comfortable and worked great.

Once at his house, he brought me to his upstairs bathroom and we pulled out the dye boxes.

"Okay, first, you're wearing clothes you don't care about, right?" he asked and gestured to my plain white tee. I nodded and he opened the box of black dye. "Let's get to it then!"

I sat on the floor in front of the bathtub and he got in behind me. The whole process took a while, with a lot of laughter and swearing. I learned more Australian slang than I thought I'd ever use.

"Alright, I think it's done. And may I just say, I should do this for a living. Because this looks amazing." Michael laughed as he took the old towel we had been using and pressed my hair in it. No dye came out on the fabric, so we knew it was done.

"Can I look?" I asked, my stomach twisting with anxiety.

"Yup. And you're going to love it," he nodded from above me. Because my head was leaned back, he was up-side-down, and I laughed.

"Well, let's see how you did." I stood up and looked in the mirror. I froze at what I saw.

There was a beautiful girl looking back at me, far prettier than I could ever be. Her black hair, even though it was wet, framed her soft face beautifully, the contrast of the darkness bringing out the color in her cheeks. Her hair shifted from black to dark turquoise, then faded to pale blue at the tips, the whole transition smooth as silk.

"Do you like it?" came Michael's voice from behind me. I jumped a bit, my attention being snapped away from the girl staring back at me.

"It that what I look like?" I asked quietly.

"Well, yeah. All I changed was your hair," he said, his voice sounding like I was crazy.

"But... I'm not that pretty..."

"Yes, you are that pretty," he chuckled. ""How are you always so modest?"

"Because I don't have anything to boast about when it comes to my appearance. But... now..." I stopped, not sure of what to say. "Thank you, Michael. I love it." I whispered, running my fingers through my hair. It was soft and damp.

"I'm glad. It took long enough!" he smiled. "Now it's your turn to help me with my hair!"

Peeling my eyes away from my reflection, I helped turn Michael's hair bright red instead of bright green. It suited him very well. His hair took a considerably small amount of time when compared to the time mine took, but his looked equally as good.

"Well, now that we've got our new hair colors, do you need to get home?" Michael asked as he dried off his hair. Mine had dried as I was doing his.

"Probably. Plus, my mom will be dying to see how it turned out. Thank you so much again Michael. It looks so amazing." I hugged him lightly.

"Your welcome Kar," he whispered as he hugged me back. 


	6. >Chapter Six<

The next day at school, I felt like a whole different person. Before, my hair was mousy brown with a pink-ish color in it. But now, my hair was bold and bright, and it made people notice me. Whether the attention was good or bad, I wasn't sure. But it definitely got people looking.

At least once during each class I got a compliment on it, and in several classes multiple people complimented it. I thanked them, trying to seem more confident.

Then came lunch. I was sitting with Michael, talking about our hair colors and how awful the school's food was, when there was a voice behind me.

"That hair is quite something." It was a voice I'd never heard, belonging to a girl. It was high and slightly nasal.

"Yeah. What happened? Did your artwork throw up on your head?" came a second voice, a bit deeper and more gravelly than the first, with a thicker accent.

"Just ignore them Kara. They're just bitches," Michael shook his head.

"Aww. Isn't that cute. Lava Boy is trying to make her feel better," whined the first voice. It was followed by a chorus of fake laughter and snickers.

"They're so perfect for each other!" came a third voice. It was soft and sweet, but venomous. "The Loser and the Drugee!" By now most of the cafeteria was quiet, listening intently. I just tried to keep my attention on my drawing, but my pencil shook slightly in my hand and I felt the prickle of tears behind my eyes.

"They can be outcasts together. How perfect." The second girl giggled. "They can have messed up babies together and everything!"

"Don't let them get to you Kar," Michael warned, glaring over at the girls.

"Oh, come on! At least make this fun for us!" the first girl whined after a moment. There was the sound of a chair scraping against the floor, and I heard the sound of quick footsteps coming closer. But they stopped a ways back, at where I judged the girls were sitting.

"Kelsey, would you just shut up for once in your life?" came a familiar voice. "Just leave her alone."

"And what are you gonna do about it, Lukey?" asked the one I guessed was Kelsey.

"You really want to see?" he asked just loud enough for me to hear.

"But she doesn't belong here. She's a freak who doesn't talk to anyone and who probably has scars and cuts all over her. So what if we just want to help her along in the process of killing herself?" Kelsey said sweetly, with shallowly veiled malice. "It's going to happen sooner or later. Why prolong the inevitable?"

At this, I snapped. Snatching up my things, I ran out into the hall, tears filling my eyes as I hurried to the bathroom. I couldn't handle her last comment.

I had gone through a time in my life where I just wanted to be gone, where I didn't see any point in living, even in art. So I'd started self-harming, and I had scars on my sides to prove it. I hadn't wanted to do it in a place that could be seen at school, so I had scars criss-crossed over the skin of my hips and upper thighs.

That topic in particular hit me hard, and I couldn't bear Kelsey's taunting anymore once she got to that point. So now I leaned on the inside of a bathroom stall, tears streaming down my cheeks, feeling the pain from each and every one of my scars at once, but this time it was worse.

I couldn't tell anyone, even my friends back home, about what I had done in the past. My mom didn't know about it either. If she had known, she would have sent me to therapy or worse, she might have institutionalized me had she known how bad it had gotten.

Now, after almost four years of being clean from that horrible decision, my fingers itched for a blade. I didn't have one, obviously, but it terrified me how easily this urge resurfaced even after all this time.

I stayed in the bathroom for the next few minutes until I heard a voice calling out in the hallway. It was Luke, and he was trying to find me. I decided to try to stop crying, but I wasn't sure if I wanted to talk to anyone at the moment.

I unlocked the stall door and walked out, wiping off the makeup that ran from my tears. I redid my mascara quickly, not attempting at eyeliner. By that point, Luke was at the entrance to the bathroom, calling in to try to find me.

I hesitated, debating whether or not I should respond. Just before he was about to leave, I responded. "I'm here Luke. Stop yelling." I stepped out into the hallway.

"I'm so sorry!" he spun around and hugged me tightly. I gasped, inhaling the scent of him as I tensed in his grasp. He smelled like cologne, but not the cheap generic stuff normal high school guys wear. He smelled rich and almost sweet, with a certain edge.

He felt me tense, and immediately let go, stepping back. "I-I'm sorry. I didn't mean to... Are you alright?" he asked worriedly.

I nodded, looking down. "I'm fine. It's not like I haven't heard that stuff before," I shrugged.

"Why do you say that?" Luke asked, his brow furrowing.

"Really? Why do I say that?" I looked up at him. "Because people assume that, because I'm always alone, I'm automatically emo!" I said bluntly. "People, if I'm not mistaken, like you. So why would a popular guy like you care if I'm alright?" I said, not intending to sound so cold.

He flinched the slightest bit, as if my words actually hurt him. "Why would you say that?" he asked, a bit angrily. "Just because I'm friends with some of the more popular kids, that doesn't mean I think like them. I've been through hell and back, so please. Don't judge me by my friends. You don't even know me," he reminded me sharply.

"Sorry, it's just... I've had horrible experiences in the past, so I'm very judgmental of people." I felt a bit hypocritical for saying such a thing about him. For judging him before I knew his story, like everyone seemed to do to me.

"It's fine. Just don't mix me up with them," he sighed, closing his eyes and putting a hand in his back pocket.

"I'm alright now. So if you want to go back to lunch, you can." I knew he probably wouldn't, but I still tried.

"Are you sure you're alright?" he said, concerned again.

"Yeah. I'm positive. Thanks."

"Okay. Then I guess I'll see you around?" Luke smiled a half smile that made my heart stop, then resume with so much force it practically exploded.

"Yeah. Most likely." I smiled back, though it was forced.

"Cool, see ya whenever, Kara." He walked back to the cafeteria, and as I started to head to my locker, I noticed a small piece of folded up paper where he'd been standing.

I picked it up, then unfolded it and saw it contained Luke's phone number. I tucked it in my pocket, then headed for my locker.


	7. >Chapter Seven<

_Where are you?_ my phone read. Michael had texted me, but I wasn't in the mood to reply. I just shoved my books into my locker and looked at myself in the little mirror on the door. My eyes were still slightly puffy, my nose red, and my cheeks flushed with color.

But at this point I really didn't care. All I wanted was to get through the day without being talked to. 

I slammed the door shut as the bell rang and made my way to art. I sat alone today, ignoring Michael's insistent questioning. He asked if I was okay, but I simply shrugged. He asked if I wanted to talk, and I shook my head. I wasn't up for verbal communication at the moment.

I dragged myself through the rest of the day, ignoring the stares in the halls and the whispers in class. I just felt like I had gone somewhat numb inside, as if my emotions were dulled.

"Look who it is!" called a voice from the side of the hallway. I had been walking back to my locker at the end of the day, but I had to pass through a throng of popular people and athletes to do so. Including Kelsey.

"It's the freak! Did you go cry in the bathroom, emo girl?" taunted another girl. I clutched my books tightly, trying to push through everyone.

"Leave her alone," said one of the boys in the clump. "Just stop, okay Kelsey? She didn't do anything to you!" I saw who was talking. It was a boy with dark hair, a SnapBack, and tan skin. I thought that might have been one of Luke's friends, but I wasn't sure.

"Oh, come on Calum. You really think _that_ has feelings?" Kelsey sneered as I finally made it through the crowd. "Have fun crying yourself to sleep, loner!" she called after me. I just walked away as quickly as possible without running.

The sound of footsteps followed me, and I assumed it might have been the boy who'd stood up for me, Calum if I heard right. But I just kept walking.

"Hey!" came his voice. Definitely Calum. "Wait up," I felt a hand on my shoulder, stopping me. I whipped around, pulling away.

"Leave me alone," I muttered, stepping back.

"I'm sorry. I just wanted to see if you were alright..." he looked at me curiously.

"Well I'm fine. So you can go run back to your friends now," I made a shooing motion and started to turn away.

"Look, I didn't do anything to you. Why are you being so hostile?" Calum asked seriously, making me freeze.

I thought for a moment, looking at him. "It's not you. It's them. I just have a hard time trusting people, especially people like that," I gestured to the crowd. A few people were looking over, but I tried not to care.

"Well, I only hang out with them because I play football. I'm not very good friends with any of them," he shrugged and looked down at his feet. "I'm not like them. But if you really won't trust anyone, then that's fine I guess."

I felt a pang of guilt. "I'm sorry. But I have to go," I said not knowing what else to say. I had to get away from them.

"Yeah, okay. See you around."

I turned and made my way to my locker. Quickly grabbing my things, I left, running inside when I reached home. I flew up the stairs, collapsing on my bed in tears of anger and humiliation and fear.

I had so many conflicting emotions raging through me, I didn't even notice my phone was ringing.

When I finally heard it, I saw I'd missed the first three calls from Michael. I decided to answer, not wanting Michael to worry.

"Yeah?" I said bluntly when I picked up.

"Kara! Why wouldn't you pick up? Are you alright? Where did you go?" Michael asked in a wave.

"Woah, woah, Mikey. Slow down. I didn't hear the phone, I'm fine, and I'm at home. Any more questions?" I sniffled and wiped at my damp eyes.

"Not really. Though I don't get why you wouldn't talk to me in art."

"Because I wasn't in the mood to talk," I shrugged to myself. "And I have a ton of homework right now so I should probably go do that," I lie slightly. I had homework, but not very much at all.

"Oh," he said, sounding disappointed. "Alright. Bye then. See you tomorrow Kara," Michael said, then hung up. I flopped back onto my bed, closing my eyes. Before I knew it, I was asleep. 


	8. >Chapter Eight<

**_It's just the freak. Don't worry. She doesn't have feelings,_** sneered the voice in my head as I sat alone in my room. **_She has no friends. She's not worth anyone's time._**

Maybe I wasn't. Did Michael care about me? Or did he just pity me? Did Luke really mean all of those things he said to me? Or could he just not bear to see a girl be such a loner? Did Calum really want to help me? Or was he just sick of hearing Kelsey's voice?

All of these thoughts ran through my mind as I stared at the white sheet of paper before me. The pencil in my hand bounced slightly as I pondered what to draw.

 ** _She's just a freak. A freak. Freak. She's nobody. Not worth a thought,_** whispered the voice. I set the tip of the pencil on the paper, drawing slowly and heavily. The picture morphed into the beautiful face of a monster, shrouded in mystery and fear. The dark shading and detail brought the flawless creature to life and it seemed to jump from the picture into my mind, terrorizing my thoughts.

The words had gotten to me, and I couldn't handle what I had been able to before. I didn't know what to do or where to go.

 ** _If you call Michael he won't care. If you call Luke he'll laugh. If you try to tell someone else, they'll run away in fear!_** Laughed the monster that now ran through my head.

Or maybe the monster was always there. Maybe now I'd just given it a form. A life. Maybe I'd unleashed the terror on myself.

I stumbled out of my room, blinded by the tears now streaming down my face. My mom had told me to take the day off from school, so I was home alone. Maybe I should have just gone in to school.

I tripped and tumbled down the stairs, crashing to the ground. I stayed there, the terror and anger and panic gathering in pools beneath my eyes, given substance in the tears dripping onto the hardwood.

 ** _No one will come now. No one will care!_** The monster in my mind howled with laughter as I got up, limping to the kitchen. I had been given a prescription for antidepressant medication a year or two ago. I'd kept it in case of a panic attack, such as the one I was having.

I grabbed the bottle, shaking out several small, white tablets. They could only make this better. The horrors in my brain could not possibly get worse.

Throwing them in my mouth, I gulped down water from the faucet and squeeze my eyes shut. The monsters only seemed to grow, fueled by my last attempt to vanquish them. I screamed, running blindly to the front door.

I yanked it open, flinging myself down the two steps in front of the house, then falling down hard on the grass. The freshly cut blades poked roughly into my skin, feeling like a million needles. I cried into the ground, my hands tangling themselves in my hair.

I was so far gone then that I only vaguely remember what happened next. I remember a strong pair of arms restraining me, a loud siren wailing in the background, a concerned, unfamiliar face watching me carefully.

Then it all went dark.

~~~~~~~~~~

"Thank you so much. I don't know what happened to her, but I can't express how grateful I am that you helped her," murmured a soft voice from what seemed like miles away.

"I only did what I hope others would do for me. I've been in her shoes, believe it or not. I know exactly how she must have felt, and I tried anything I could," replied another, slightly lower voice. A man, if I heard correctly.

My heart raced as I tried to open my eyes, slowly becoming aware of my surroundings. I lay on an uncomfortable bed, surrounded by the beeping of monitors and the smell of medicine and antiseptic. That meant one thing.

I was in the hospital.

My eyes flew open at that point. I gasped at the shocking light that blinded me for a few moments. "What's happening?! Where am I?!" I asked hurriedly, the words sounding slightly muffled.

"Calm down, sweetheart. You're alright," came my mother's voice. She rushed over and took my hand, trying to comfort me.

"What happened mom?" I asked in a tiny voice.

"You're alright," she whispered, tears brimming in her eyes. "I promise you're okay, baby. I'm so sorry."

"Tell me what happened, mom!" I almost yelled. I just needed to know what was going on and why I was lying in the hospital. Why I was hooked up to about a billion wires.

"You had a panic attack, if I'm not mistaken," said the man from a few moments ago. He was far younger looking than I'd expected, with wavy hair that was caramel-brown and reached his shoulders, as well as dimpled cheeks. He wore a black tank, exposing his muscular arms, a pair of black ripped jeans, and Converse. He looked only a year or two older than me, and had bracelets covering his wrists. I had a guess why he wore so many.

"Who are you?" I asked nervously.

"Honey, this is Ashton. He helped you while you were having the attack," mom explained. A tear slipped out and she quickly brushed it away. She hated crying in front of me. "He's very kind and he says he's been in the same position as you before. That's why he helped."

"Yeah. I heard that..." I murmured, watching Ashton as he approached. He smiled sadly at me, taking my other hand a bit awkwardly.

"You'll be alright. I promise," he nodded to me. "It'll get better."

"I'm not really depressed anymore. I mean, I used to be, but now it's just because of the kids at school. They were harassing me because I only talk to one person." I looked down at my legs that were stretched out in front of me.

"Wait, what are you talking about Kar? Why didn't you tell me," mom asked, stunned.

"Because I didn't want to worry you, mom! I felt like you had enough on your plate without worrying about my school life too."

"Well, I could try to help in any way I can," Ashton offered.

"Thanks. It would be kinda nice to have someone to talk to." I nodded.

"I gave your mom my number in case you ever need anything. I'm usually around, so I'll pick up," he smile again, running a hand over his stubbly chin.

I nodded, closing my eyes. "I'm sorry mom," I whispered, squeezing her hand.

"I'm just glad you're alright baby. I was so worried that you'd done something... horrible. But you're alright and that's all that matters," she pressed my hand to her lips, and I felt a warm tear plop down on my skin. She sniffed and reached over, brushing the hair from my face.

"Get some rest sweetheart. You look exhausted." She stood, kissed my forehead, then she and Ashton left. The silence was broken only by the steady beeping of the monitors and the breath in and out of my lungs. 


	9. >Chapter Nine<

It was two days before I was released from the hospital. Two days filled with visits from people at school I didn't even know, who probably wanted to see if I was still alive or not. I figure they all heard about it and thought I'd tried to kill myself.

The hospital bed was the most uncomfortable thing I've ever had to endure in my life. Really, if hospitals are supposed to take care of the sick, you'd think they'd get more comfortable beds! I was twisting and turning the entire two days. At the moment, I had my legs crossed over the blanket, too warm to be under it.

On the second day, Luke arrived. He wore a red and black flannel shirt and black, ripped skinny jeans, along with black Converse. He smiled as he stepped inside the room, shutting the door quietly behind him.

"Hi Kara," he said softly, stepping toward the bed, but stopping a few feet away. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm fine. I didn't try to overdose, if that's what you mean," I looked out the window. "Why?"

"I just thought I'd be a nice person and check in. Jeez, I didn't know I'd get yelled at."

"I'm sorry. It's just that I've been getting a lot of... visitors who seem to only be here to make sure I'm dead or something." I looked over at him slowly, finding him a bit closer to the bed.

"I'm just glad you're alright," he clasped his hands behind him and looked down at his shoes.

I closed my eyes and leaned back, knowing he was still there. There was silence for a moment before I asked, "So. How was school yesterday and today? Did I miss anything important at lunch?"

"No, just people being suspicious of where you were. They figured you killed yourself, and Kelsey was all proud of herself." I opened my eyes and saw he was looking at me. "I'm really glad you didn't though..." he whispered.

There was a knock on the door, followed by the click of it opening. "Oh, hey Ashton," I smiled as he entered. "Luke, this is Ashton. Ashton, this is Luke."

"Hey man," Luke smiled and shook Ashton's hand.

"Nice to meet you Luke. Kara mentioned your name a few times," Ashton said, ginning at me. I just blushed darkly.

"She has?" Luke said in a surprised tone.

"Yeah. Quite a bit, actually," he nodded.

"So, Ash. What do you need?" I said in an attempt to change the subject.

"Oh yeah. Your mom told me to let you know she had to go in to work today, so she won't be here."

"Okay, thanks." I nodded.

"You got it!" He turned to the door. "Nice meeting you Luke," he said before exiting.

"So how do you know him?" Luke said, his voice tinged with an emotion I couldn't quite pick out.

"He's the one who found me and called an ambulance. He saved my life," I explained and Luke came to the side of the bed, his eyes almost checking me over for injuries.

"What are these from?" His voice was almost a whisper as he ran his fingers lightly over the neat row of thin scars on my upper thigh. I hadn't realized they were exposed, and I quickly tried to pull the hospital gown over them. But it wasn't fast enough.

"They're nothing," I tried, knowing it was probably useless.

"Those aren't nothing, Kara," he shook his head. "But they're nothing to be ashamed of. See?" He unbuttoned his sleeve and pulled it up to his elbow. At first, all I saw were his tattoos. They were beautiful.

On his forearm, there was a skull on the inside, done perfectly, and on the outside were three birds in flight. In the crook of his elbow was a dream-catcher, and above that I could see some roses peeking out.

"What? All I see are your tattoos..." I said in a confused tone.

"See this one?" he pointed to the skull. "Look at it closely. Look at my skin itself, not the tattoo," he said and moved his arm so I could see it better. He crouched on the ground, his face close to mine as I searched for what he meant.

Then I saw a cluster of shiny scars, and I understood at that moment why he got tattoos. He took what was ugly and made it beautiful.

"Luke..." I said in a whisper, looking at him. His face was only a few inches from mine, and it surprised me for a moment.

"Each tattoo has a story, and that's the skull's story. I got it to hide from my past."

I didn't know what to say to that, and I was really at a loss for words when Luke leaned over and gently kissed my scars. Why was he treating me like I meant something to him? Did I?

"I've gotta run Kara. See you at school tomorrow?" he said after a few moments of silence from both of us.

"Yeah. I-I should be out of here in a few hours," I nodded as he stood and rolled down his sleeve, buttoning it again.

"Good. I'm really glad you're okay," he smiled. "See ya," he waved before exiting.

Alone with only my thoughts, I pondered what had just happened as the doctors came in and said I was all ready to go home.


	10. >Chapter Ten<

School. I was dreading it, but I knew I had to go to prove to everyone that I wasn't dead. Especially Kelsey.

I picked out my cutest outfit, a black and white striped top, along with a high-waisted black skirt, a black beanie and scarf, black knee-high socks, and black ankle-high heels. (See picture above) I walked into school with faked confidence, and I almost laughed when Kelsey saw me and did a double take.

"Hiya," I smiled as I stopped next to Michael's locker. He moved the door and saw it was me, then wrapped me in a tight hug.

"I'm so glad you're alright!" he murmured in my ear. Stepping back, he looked me over, almost like he was searching me for injuries.

"Mikey, I'm fine!" I laughed and shrugged.

"You sure? Because this doesn't seem anything like the Kara I know." He smiled.

"Yes I'm sure it's me Michael." I rolled my eyes and closed his locker for him. He smiled and we walked toward science, my first class of the day. "So, how has school been?" I asked him casually.

"Pretty good. I missed you though," he shrugged. "Do you want to talk about what happened at all, or...." his voice trailed off.

"It's not like I did it on purpose, if that's what you mean," I looked at the ground. People stared at us as we walked past, the girl with blue hair and the boy with red hair. That's all we were to them, the outcasts who sat alone at lunch.

The girl who may, or may not have attempted to commit suicide.

"This is my class. See you at lunch, yeah?" I smiled falsely at Michael as I arrived at my science class.

"Yeah. Can't wait to eat!" he laughed and started walking again. "Bye Kar!"

"Bye Mikey!" I walked into the class and attracted quite a few stares and poorly concealed whispers. But I wasn't going to let a panic attack like that happen again.

I dragged myself through science, math, and Latin, then it was lunch time. I'd forgotten to pack a lunch today, so I had to buy.

Grabbing a place in line, I waited as people shuffled slowly forward, waiting to get their food.

"Get the French toast. That's the best thing they've got here," came Luke's voice from behind me. I turned to see him smiling down at me, even with my heels on.

"Why do you always do that?" I asked and pursed my lips delicately.

"Do what?" The confusion was plain on his face.

"Whenever you talk to me, you always come up from behind and say whatever you want to say! No, 'Hi Kara. How ya doin?' It's kind of weird," I laughed.

"Oh, that. Well, I don't know. I guess I just like seeing you jump with surprise." I glared at him as he smirked. "How have you been since yesterday?" he asked and moved forward along with me.

"I've been fine," I shrugged. "People keep judging me though. I can just tell. But I don't give a damn anymore."

"Good!" Luke grinned. "Don't listen to them. The only opinion that matters is your own."

"Yeah," I nodded and put my tray on the counter as we arrived at the food options. I grabbed a parfait and French toast, and Luke got French toast, a sandwich, and a Pepsi. "See you around then?" I said as we walked away from the line.

"I was actually wondering if you'd like to sit at my table today." Luke said curiously.

"Oh," I nodded slowly and glance over to where he usually sat. The table was filled with boys. "Um, I'd love to, except its sort of crowded and I had some art to do today."

"Alright. I understand that," he nodded and smiled. "Then I guess I'll see you tomorrow, if not later today."

"Yeah, see you later Luke." I smiled warmly and headed toward where Michael already sat, munching on a piece of celery.

"What was that all about?" he asked and pointed in the direction of Luke's table.

"Oh, he was just asking if I was alright. Being courteous, I guess." I sat down across from him. It was at least part of the truth.

"Ah," he nodded, looking slightly skeptical. "Do you have to do work today?"

"Yeah. I have to work on that portrait for art," I replied and grabbed one of the sketchbooks from my bag. I thought it was the one with the portrait of my mom, so I flipped through page by page looking for the piece.

I sensed Michael was watching, looking at my art as I leafed through each page. Then, in the middle of a clump of empty pages, the last thing I wanted to show anyone appeared.

The drawing from my nightmare. The one with Luke.

"Hey, woah, woah, woah," Mikey put a hand on the paper to stop me from turning the page. "What is this?" He looked at it carefully. "That's not... Luke, is it?" He looked up at me with a slightly hurt look on his face.

"It's nothing Michael. Don't worry about it," I broke eye contact, unable to take his look. "It was just from a dream."

"This looks more like it was from a nightmare..." he looked back at the drawing. I still got nauseous when I looked at it an remembered his iron grip around my wrist.

"I said not to worry about it!" I slammed the book shut. The clamour of the cafeteria dimmed slightly as I almost yelled at him. "I'm sorry," I muttered. "I just don't want to talk about it here, okay?"

"Y-yeah," he shrugged and sat back down. "Sorry if I upset you."

"Don't be. It's just a bit of a touchy topic for me."

The rest of the day flew by as I waited to go home. I spent all night cooped up in my room doing homework and contemplating the drawing in silence.


	11. >Chapter Eleven<

Friday rolled around, but Michael and I hardly talked. It wasn't that we didn't want to talk, but we didn't seem to know what to say.

I received several sneers and insults throughout the day. People apparently still thought I shouldn't be here. They thought I should go back to the States. Or better, kill myself. I just ignored them, walking past coldly.

The school day proceeded as usual and I drove home afterward. The weekend was far too short, and but the next few days went by without a hitch. I just seemed to float through that week, unaware of the happenings of school. My head was stuck in a haze of silence and smoke, and no matter how hard I tried to shake off the cloud it simply reformed a moment later.

Finally, at lunch on Friday Michael struck up a conversation.

"So, Kara. Um, I was wondering if you wanted to come over tonight. I'm having a party, and I think you'd have fun. Some of my older friends are coming and they're pretty cool people. It's kinda an open invite thing, so anyone can come. But I just figure I'd invite you anyway," he shrugged and looked at his food intently.

"Sure. What time is it at?" I asked and looked up at him.

"It starts at seven-ish, but won't actually get fun till probably eight. You can come over whenever though."

"Should I wear something dressy, or casual or in the middle?"

"Whatever you wanna wear. Doesn't really matter. There'll probably be a lot of people though, so you should wear something you feel cute in." He winked playfully, making me laugh.

"Okay, cool," I nodded. "I'll be there."

"Awesome," he smiled as the bell rang for the next period. "Wanna sit together in art?" He fell in stride next to me a we both made our way to art class. We hadn't been sitting together for the entire week, our friendship barely there.

"I'd like that," I smiled. The rest of the day went by slowly as I counted the minutes until the party.

When I got home, I trudged up the stairs and to my room, thinking of what I could wear. I rummaged through my closet, searching for something cute enough to impress Michael's older friends.

I tried on outfit after outfit, dress after dress, and collapsed on my bed in frustration. I glared at the clothes hanging on the rack, wishing I could make cuter clothes magically appear.

That's when I noticed a dress bag hanging in the farthest back corner of my closet. I hadn't seen it before, but I got up and went to see what it was. I took it out, unzipping the opaque black bag, then gasped.

It was a light grey dress with a delicate black lace overlay. The front was modest with a fairly high neckline, but as I took it out to look at the back, I saw that the grey fabric plunged down to form a low back, while the black lace continued over where my back would be. It was beautiful.

I hurried to try it on, checking how it looked in the mirror. The dress was snug, emphasizing what curves I had, and hit my mid-thigh. I turned to look at the back and smiled. The dress covered enough that it wasn't inappropriate, but small enough that it looked sexy. I was going to drop jaws tonight.

I looked at the time, which read 5:36 pm. I still had a few hours, so I decided to actually do my hair and makeup.

I padded over to the bathroom off of my bedroom, pulling one of the large pallets off of a shelf on the wall. I'd never even opened it, on account of the fact that I hardly ever wore much on my face. But now I had a use for it. I popped it open to reveal an artists' array of colors, ranging from deep, rich purples, to fair pinks and yellows, to bright, vibrant greens and oranges, to smooth aquas and grays.

I settled on a smoky eye, but instead of using black and brown, I used a dark grey on my lids and blended it into a beautiful turquoise color. It took me about half an hour to get it to my artist's standards, but it looked amazing after.

I then proceeded to do my eyeliner, trying to get the wings as even as humanly possible, then mascara and soft pink lip stain. Looking at the time, I grabbed the flat iron out of a cupboard. I still had about an hour and forty five minutes before the party, so I straightened my hair, pulling up the two front pieces and tying them back. The look frame my face wonderfully, and I marveled at how different I looked.

When I had about ten minutes before the party actually started, I went to my mom's closet and picked out a pair of black, strappy heels. I knew they would kill my feet, but beauty is painful, right?

I got in my car after grabbing my phone off the desk in my room and opened my messages before starting the vehicle. I tapped on the conversation I was having with mom and texted her:

_From: me_

_Hey mama. Michael invite me over to a party. I'll call if it gets too bad, but I might be home late. Don't worry if I don't respond to texts. There will probably be loud music. Not really sure. Anyway, I love you and I'll be home tonight. Xoxo_

With that, I put the key in the ignition and backed out of the driveway, then made my way to Michael's house, ready for the party.

~~~~~~~~~~

Music pounded from two tall speakers on either side of Michael's lounge room. It was good music too, like blink 182, Panic! at the Disco, Fall Out Boy, and Nirvana. So I really didn't mind at all.

But what I did mind was the amount of grinding that was going on. When Mikey said a few people, he was totally lying. There were at least a hundred people there, all crowded together in a huge moshpit, bodies drenched in sweat and hair flying in all directions.

I had to admit, some of Michael's college friends were cute. Really cute. They all seemed like really nice people, if not a little too eager for a girlfriend. I was currently talking to one of them named Matt. He had long black hair, snake bites, and light blue eyes, as well as one of the sharpest jawlines I'd ever seen.

"So how old are you?" he said loudly over the pounding beat and clamor of the crowd.

"18. You?" I almost had to yell back. We were leaned near to each other, yet it was still difficult to hear.

"20. I'm not going to college though. I'm pursuing a career in the music industry." Matt looked down at the ground, his hands in his pockets.

"That sounds awesome! I'm probably going to be an artist." Even though I knew he was probably the nicest guy in the world, I still felt awkward talking I people other than Michael. And Luke, I guess.

Matt pulled his phone from his pocket and I saw the screen was lit up as someone tried to call him. "Oh man, I'm sorry. I've gotta take this. Catch you later?" he said, moving toward the door.

"Yeah! See ya!" I nodded and moved toward the kitchen where the food was. There were drinks on the counter, as well as snacks. I grabbed a few chips and ate them, looking around. People were mulling around, laughing and talking loudly. Most had drinks in their hands, and I figured that most were drunk.

"Hey! Kara!" came Michael's voice as he emerged from around the corner. "I'm glad you made it." He smiled and hugged me.

"Of course," I laughed. He smelled slightly of alcohol, but I just ignored it. "This is some party Mikey."

"Yeah. I had a better turnout than I'd expected," he nodded. "Oh, did you see that Calum came?"

"Oh?" I said. Calum, the boy from the hallway. I wasn't sure if that was a good thing or not.

"Michael!!" came a shrill cry from the next room.

"I'll be right back okay? Gotta make sure nothing's going on," he smiled and hurried away.

I just stood there next to the counter and nibbled on chips while looking at my phone. Mom hadn't texted yet, but I wasn't worried about that.

I had just locked my phone and was about to go back to the dance floor when a pair of muscular, tattooed arms circled around my shoulders, pulling me against a warm body. I panicked, looking down at the person's arms in fright.

Then I saw a skull tattoo on one of them and relaxed slightly.

"Hi," Luke's voice purred in my ear. "I didn't expect to see you here, Kar."

"What do you need Luke?" I asked quietly.

"Just saying hi," he chuckled. His breath was clear of the taint of the alcohol everyone else was gulping down, and I wondered why he was acting like this.

I was about to try to get out of his grasp when he brushed the hair at the base of my neck back and placed his lips ever so lightly on the skin there. I froze, every muscle tensing as he kissed me gently.

"Luke..." I whispered, closing my eyes.

"Yes?" His breath was hot on my skin, making it prickle slightly.

I stayed silent, unsure of what I was going to say in the first place.

"Would you like me to stop?" he asked before kissing my neck again, a bit higher up this time.

I thought for a moment, weighing the pros and cons of the moment. I secretly craved this. Ever since the moment I saw him, this was exactly what I wanted with him. This kind of small, tender moment. However, I wasn't sure if that was in my best interests. Would he just take me home for a night then dump me out on the street the next morning? 

But he had come to visit me in the hospital. That had to mean _something,_ right?

Making up my mind, I shook my head slightly. "No, I don't."

"Then loosen up will you?" he kissed up higher. "I'm afraid you might snap from the tension."

I tried to relax, leaning into him more than before. He chuckled quietly and turned my face toward his so he could place kisses along my jawline.

I shivered under his feather light touches, even though his body was hot against my semi-exposed back.

"Should we take this elsewhere?" His lips paused millimeters away from mine, turning up in a smirk.

I wasn't sure what that would entail, but I nodded anyway. How bad could it be? 


	12. >Chapter Twelve<

It turns out, the situation got worse. _Way_ worse.

Luke guided me upstairs to one of the empty bedrooms. He opened the door and held it for me as I took a hesitant step inside. As I entered the door shut loudly behind me, the lock clicking. I whirled around, almost falling in my heels.

But Luke caught me before that could happen. His arms caught my waist, and his lips caught mine, pressing together softly at first, then more intensely.

I gasped, pulling back a fraction of an inch to look at him. His blue eyes were wild and beautiful as they peered into my own green ones. His cheeks were flushed, his fingers clutching at the fabric of my dress.

"One second please," I whispered, hating to break the moment. I leaned down and undid the clasps on my shoes, then set them aside. Without them, I was about three inches shorter, so Luke had to bend over even farther to kiss me, but he didn't seem to mind.

He took my face in his hands as I turned back to him, and kissed me gently, not like before though. This was sweet and tender, not hungry and impulsive. He took care with my mouth and my cheeks and my hair. He touched me lightly, not forcefully, as if asking if this were alright.

In return, I kissed him back, my fingertips running down his smooth cheeks. His lip ring pressed into my lips, but it felt perfect. His hands trailed down my sides and came to rest on my hips.

Hardly breaking the kiss, he whispered against my mouth to jump. I did, and he latched his arms around my waist as I did the same around his neck. My legs wrapped around his middle and clung on as he moved toward the dresser.

Placing me carefully on top of it, he now had to tilt his head back to kiss me. It felt odd to be taller than him.

His lips strayed from mine, traveling over my jaw and down my neck. His hand moved up my arm to the top of the sleeve. He slid it down slightly, exposing my shoulder as his lips reached the base of my throat. I leaned my head against the wall at my back and sighed, my fingers tangling in his hair as I tugged at it gently.

Then, his lips were at the skin beneath my ear instead of the base of my throat. I was wondering why he'd moved them so abruptly when he bit down lightly. I groaned quietly and I felt him smile against my skin, biting down a bit harder.

"L-Luke-" I gasped, my back arching off the wall. The pressure decreased as he sucked on the patch of skin, a grin on his mouth.

"Luke," I whispered. He gave my neck one final kiss before looking at me. The smirk on his face made my heart stop.

"Just wait until tomorrow to look at that one," he whispered back, making me flush deeply.

"Um, I don't want to go too far, you know-" I stopped as he nodded. "Why are you all of a sudden into me?" I murmured, looking down at his tattoos. They were beautiful.

"I've _been_ into you, Kara," he lifted my chin with a finger. "Since that moment I saw you first, I knew you'd be perfect. And look how that's turned out," he placed his lips on mine again.

"But _why?_ Why do you like _me?_ I just don't get it." I said a little louder, my voice not in a whisper anymore.

Luke sighed, placing both hands on the edge of the dresser and leaning into them. His arms tensed from supporting his body weight and they rippled under his tattoos, making me blush. "Because. You're amazing. You are the most humble person I've met in my life. You are such a good artist, yet you hate people giving you compliments on your pieces.

"Also," he continued. "You are so sweet and kind. Even when you were yelling at me last week, I couldn't help but notice how you seemed uncomfortable while raising your voice. Thirdly, you are the most beautiful girl I've seen in my life. I catch a glimpse of you in the hallways and my stomach does flips, my heart exploding from how gorgeous you are." He brushed his fingers across my cheek, smiling softly. "What isn't there to love?" he whispered.

I inhaled slowly, my breath shaking slightly. The heat radiating off of his skin warmed my cold hands as he leaned in to kiss me again briefly. The scent of him enveloped me, drawing me in with a hint of cinnamon and something sweet.

"I'll take it slow," his lips quirked into a little smile against mine a he picked me up again, one hand under my thigh to hold me up and the other at the small of my back. He laid me on the bed, leaning on one elbow so he hovered over me. He placed himself so I could feel every curve of his stomach and chest, but I wasn't baring his weight. "Promise." His lips moved more against mine, the two pairs fitting together like a key in a lock.

I wasn't really aware of anything in particular after that point. Just general feelings and thoughts and events. His shirt was lost at some point in the process, and my hair had gotten unpinned, hanging in a curtain as I found myself on top of him. I remember the taste of his tongue against mine, the sound of his low growls as I tugged on his hair gently, the contours of his chest, his arms, his stomach, his back, all hard muscle and heat under my curious fingers. I remember the countless whispered words, passing from my lips to his, from his lips to mine.

I remember how perfectly we fit together, two pieces of a puzzle, two parts of a whole that had finally found one another in a world of similar figures and fakes. It was the best night of my life.

~~~~~~~~~~

Pounding. Was it music? No, it couldn't be. It was inside my skull, driving nails through my brain and making me wince in agony. I knew I wasn't hungover. I hadn't had anything to drink at all last night.

I then noticed I was lying in a bed, and wondered if I was still at Michael's house. So I painstakingly opened my eyes to find sunlight streaming through lace curtains. I yelped as it blinded me for a moment, covering my face with my arm. I was in my room somehow, though I don't remember driving home last night.

I lay there on my pristine white bed, sore as all hell, my muscles and joints stiff and hard to move as I attempted to get up. My efforts were in vain, as I collapsed back onto the pillow, a fresh wave of pain exploding behind my forehead.

I turned my head to look at the patterns cast by the curtains on the sheets and wondered what time it was. I reached for my phone which rested on my nightstand and pressed the home button. It was almost ten in the morning and I groaned.

After a minute or two, I tried to get up again, this time succeeding. I swung my legs over the side of the bed and stood carefully. I looked at myself an notice I was in an unfamiliar pair of sweats, as well as a blink-182 shirt that I didn't own. Who's clothes were these?

I pulled the shirt up to my nose, inhaling deeply. I smiled as I smelled Michael on the clothes. I vaguely remember that before things got too crazy last night I'd grabbed them to wear instead of my expensive dress. It serve me well, apparently.

I padded slowly over to my bathroom and didn't turn on the light. It would be too bright, and I had a small window anyway, so I could see just fine.

Not that I could have missed my appearance, though.

My hair was knotted, sticking up a bit on the side. My mouth was swollen from hours of kissing and lip biting. My cheeks were red with blood remaining from the events last night. My eyes were smudged with blue-grey, the color no longer carefully contained on my eyelids. But my neck was the most noticeable. Peppered with little marks, I ran my fingers over the hickeys, my mind flashing back to how I got each one. Some were tiny and barely there, but then there was the one near my ear. It was deep purple, in the shape of Luke's mouth.

I felt my mouth curve into a gentle smile at the thought of Luke. Last night had been like nothing I'd ever experienced. It was better than I could have imagined, even though we kept most of our clothes on. As a matter of fact, the only piece of clothing that came off was Luke's shirt, now that I thought about it.

But that didn't matter to me. The way he'd treated me, like I were the most valuable thing on the planet and he had the chance to take care of it. It made my heart sing as I left the bathroom and walked downstairs, praying mom was at work already.


	13. >Chapter Thirteen<

I tried to be quiet as I walked downstairs in case mom was home. I didn't want her to see my neck, especially the hickey near my ear. She'd be upset if she saw them.

I grabbed a bagel from the bag in the cupboard, as well as a single-serving container of cream cheese and a knife, then padded back upstairs. I made it to my room without her knowing.

I sat in my hanging chair, texting Michael.

 _What happened to you last night? You disappeared after I went to go check on that girl..._ Michael sent after saying good morning.

I hesitated, wondering how much I should tell him. _Oh, uh, I had to go home. I wasn't feeling well._

_Mm. I'm mad. I can't find one of my shirts anywhere. :'(_

_What shirt are you looking for?_ I asked curiously.

_My blink tee?_

I sighed, figuring I was wearing the one he was searching for. _I have it, actually..._

_WHY?!?!?!_

_Because, um, I actually didn't go home after you talked to me... *hides behind Chuck Norris for protection*_

There was a pause before Michael sent: _What were you doing then?_

Instead of simply telling him, I sent him a picture of my neck, not including beneath my ear.

_OH. MY. GOD!!!!! YOU GOT LAID!!!!!!!_

_No I didn't actually. But I was wearing a very expensive dress and didn't want it to get messed up._

_Sure..._

The banter continued like this for hours until Michael had to go out to something with his parents.

That's when I remembered the folded up piece of paper from the hall. I dug around for it, then proceeded to enter the number on the paper.

To: Luke

_Hiya. :D It's Kara_

I awaited a reply for all of about two seconds.

_Hi Kar. How do you look? >;D_

I laughed quietly and sent him the same picture that I'd sent Michael. _Like this_ , was all I said.

There was a slight pause. _Wow, I did a good job._

I felt myself blush at this. _I didn't know you felt that way about me..._

 _Of course I do. How do think I wouldn't?_ His reply made me smile.

 _I don't know. I'm just not used to this, I guess..._ I respond after a moment of hesitation.

 _Wanna go out to lunch today?_ was all he said after that. I blushed, wondering if he was talking about going on an actual date or not.

 _Like, a date?_ I typed the first thing that came to mind.

_If you want it to be a date..._

_Sure. I'd like that. Where are we going?_

A pause stopped the conversation as I assumed he was trying to pick a place to go. _What about that little Italian place? They have really good pizza._

_I don't think I've ever been there. I've seen it, but never gone in. What's it called again?_

_I think it's Roberto's or something like that._

_Sounds good. What time?_ I felt the butterflies in my stomach begin to form as I hugged my knees to my chest.

_What about 2? Is that enough time for you?_

I looked at the time. 1:08. _That sounds great. I'll be ready by then. :)_

_Cool. See you at 2 then! ;D_

_Bai x)_ I sent before standing to go get dressed.

~~~~~~~~~~

Forty minutes later, I was all decked out in my Unicorn Tears pullover with the sleeves pushed up, along with black ripped skinny jeans, a white beanie with "vibes" on it, and my glasses. I put on light makeup and brushed out my hair. Slipping on my black Converse and picking up my bag, I set out.

My car squeaked to a stop in front of Roberto's Pizzeria. It was a cute little restaurant with big front windows and a Spanish tiled roof. I walked in and was greeted by the warmth of the big stone ovens and the scent I fresh pizza. I looked around to see if Luke had arrived yet, then spotted him in the corner next to the window. He was looking at me with a smile.

Blushing, I went to sit across from him. The table was probably meant for a group larger than just two people, but at least we'd have space to eat.

"Hi," I greeted him quietly.

"Hi." He moved the menu he'd gotten me across the table. "Here you are."

"Thanks." I looked up to see him watching me carefully over the top of his menu, like they did in movies. I raised an eyebrow. "Yes?"

"Nothing," he shook his head and looked down at the food options, though I could tell he was smiling.

"Ok then," I chuckled. "What are you getting?"

"What every boy gets. The giant pizza." Luke grinned at me and set down his menu. I realized how handsome he looked, even though he was only wearing a flannel and black skinny jeans.

"Why do you torture you digestive system like that?" I laughed.

"Because my digestive system can handle it," he countered. "What are you going to get?"

"I think I'm going to get the spaghetti." I set down my menu as well and smiled.

"Safe choice. But doesn't pasta sauce stain on white?" Luke smirked and gestured to my white pullover.

I shrugged and nodded. "I could always get the garden salad."

"You should try their white pizza. It has no sauce, but it's still so good." His eyes lit up a he said that.

I laughed, moving my feet a bit further out from under me. I bumped Luke's foot with mine. "Oh, sorry," I said awkwardly. Then I felt his shoe knock against mine. That was how our foot war began. We sat there for two or three minutes just kicking each other, lightly of course, and laughing like little kids. People gave us weird looks, but we paid no attention to them.

Finally, a waitress came over. "Hello," she said in an overly perky voice. "Are you two ready to order?" she asked and glanced at me, before smiling at Luke. She was really going to try to flirt with him?

"Yes," I said quickly. "I'll have the white pizza with pepperoni as well as a Coke." She gave me a thinly veiled look of annoyance before writing down my order and turning back to Luke.

"And for you hon?" she singsonged.

"I'll just have the mega pizza with pepperoni as well. And I'll get a lemonade too," he said and grinned at me. It made the butterflies in my stomach go crazy.

"Alright, will that be all?" the girl asked.

"Yeah, I think so," I said and handed her our menus. She nodded and left. I looked out the window to watch a young couple stroll past us, hands clasped and shoulders leaning against each other.

Would that be us one day?


	14. >Chapter Fourteen<

We spent the entire day laughing. After we ate, Luke asked if I'd like to walk around the area. After going to the local playground, we went and got ice cream at Mickey's, a minuscule shop on the side of the road. And when I say minuscule, I mean that you went in on one side, ordered at the counter while standing in a four foot wide aisle, then you left through the other side door.

But they had the best ice cream there. I got a sundae with vanilla ice cream, chocolate fudge, strawberries, and sprinkles, while Luke got a cone with cookie dough and mint chocolate chip. We sat outside at one of the picnic tables in the park eating our frozen treats and talking.

"So you really put hand prints on your wall?" he laughed, licking away some melted ice cream that was about to drip onto his hand.

"Mm hmm," I nodded, grinning. "They're all over. And every year on my birthday, I'd take a different color and make a new layer higher up on the wall."

"That sounds so cool!" His lips turned up in an adorable grin that made my stomach flutter. "So it's just you and your mum then?" he asked quietly, almost apprehensively.

"Yeah, my dad was in a really bad car crash and died a few days before I was born," I shrugged and ate some more ice cream before it all melted.

"Wow, I'm really sorry to hear that Kar..." He sounded sympathetic as he said this. I tilted my head slightly.

"What about your parents?" I asked curiously.

"Oh, I don't live with them anymore. It's actually just my mum as well, so I can relate to that too... We had a falling out, so I went and got my own flat." He smiled ruefully, licking his cone again. "It's nice to be on my own. I honestly can't imagine living with her anymore."

"Gosh..." I murmured, looking up at the sky. It was clear as far as I could see, the sun shining down intensely. "Does it ever get lonely?"

"Sometimes, but if I get lonely I can always invite people over. That's the nice thing about not having anyone else living there. I can do whatever the hell I want," he laughed and finished off the last of his ice cream. I did the same, and we just sat there together, talking for who knows how long.

Eventually, it started to get dark. "Crap, I should probably get going. My mom might get worried."

"Yeah, don't want you getting in trouble on our first date," he smirked. I rolled my eyes and stood up. We walked back toward the pizzeria, then stopped. "I had a lot of fun today," Luke admitted.

"Me too. I wasn't expecting to learn so much about you," I grinned up at him. "I'll have to check out that flat of yours sometime." I tried to be cute and wink, but it probably ended up looking like my eye was twitching. He laughed, as did I.

"See you on Monday then?" he raised an eyebrow.

"Yeah, see you on Monday," I nodded. He hugged me then, surprising me. I hugged him back, breathing in that wonderful smell that clung to him. "Thank you for today," I muttered into his shirt. The only response was him tightening his grip slightly, before he released me.

"Bye Kara," he said softly.

"Bye Luke," I waved and pulled open my car door. As I got in, I ran over the day's events in my mind. We'd talked for about six hours, with eating mixed in. I'd learned so much about him, that his favourite color was blue, that he was the youngest of three, that his favourite animals were penguins. It was a perfect day, and I wish it didn't have to end.


	15. >Chapter Fifteen<

"I'm home mom!" I called as I walked through the front door. It was almost ten o'clock by the time I get there, and I'd expected her to be asleep in her room. But she was sitting on the couch in the family room, watching a show on the tv.

"Hi baby," she smiled and waved, her eyes not leaving the screen.

"I'm gonna head upstairs and go to bed," I told her, putting my door on the first step.

"Alright. Did you have fun with that boy?" she asked curiously.

I hesitated for a moment, before blushing. "Yeah. I had a great time," I responded softly. "Night mom."

"Night Kar. I love you," she called as I started up the stairs.

"Love you too. Don't stay up _too_ late," I laughed. Making my way to my room, I shut the door behind me and settled on hanging chair. I pulled out my phone and texted Luke.

_Me: Hi_

_Luke: Hiya :-)_

_Me: I wanted to say thanks for today. I had a lot of fun._

_Luke: You're welcome. I did too. You got home alright?_

_Me: Yeah. My mom was fine with me getting home a little late._

_Luke: Good. I wouldn't want to make a bad impression on the first date. ;D_

_Me: Soooooooooo............if that was a date........what does that make us???_

_Luke: What do you want it to make us?_

_Me: Idk. What would you say?_

_Luke: Weeeeelllllllll.....it could make us bf/gf...if you're cool with it, that is. :-)_

I blushed darkly. _Really?_

_Me: (-:_

_Luke: So is :-)/(-: like our always now?_

_Me: O_o.............did you really just- omg. OMFG YOU REALLY JUST SAID THAT I LOVE YOU EVEN MORE NOW!!!!!!!!!!!_

_Luke: Wait.........you love me :-)_

_Me: ...............Idk maybe..............._

_Luke: Hehehehe she loves me!! ^-^_

_Me: I ONLY SAID MAYBE!!!_

_Luke: I'll win this one Kara. No matter what you try to say, you already said you love me. It's okay. ;-D_

_Me: ...........idk what to say to that._

_Luke: Don't worry little penguin. I love you too ( >^-^>)_

I froze, a small smile plastering itself to my face along with another dark blush. First, that nickname was too cute. Second, did he really mean it?

_Me: Really??_

There was no response. I waited for about five minutes for him to text back, but he didn't. Suddenly, the silence of my room was broken by the loud ringing of my phone. I jumped, looking at the caller ID. It was Luke.

I quickly picked up, grinning like a crazy person.

"Hi," I said softly.

"Hey penguin." I laughed a bit at the name, feeling the butterflies in my stomach explode. "What? Are you laughing at me?" He tried to sound hurt, but failed.

"No. I just love that nickname. It's so cute," I leaned my head on my knees, still grinning.

"That's your contact name in my phone," he laughed.

"Aw!" I hid my face in my knees, though from who, I wasn't sure. I was the only one in here. "So why'd you call?" I asked curiously.

"Well, I wanted to say good night," he began. "And I just figured it would be more romantic to call you instead of text you."

I giggled a little before replying. "Goodnight to you too then!"

"Wait! I didn't even say i- well, I guess I did, actually," he laughed. Was that nervousness in his voice? "I hope you sleep well and that your dreams are sweet like you are. I-I love you Kara," he ended in a near whisper. That's when I really blushed.

I didn't know what to say to that. I was so stunned that he'd been the first one to actually say it. I never would have expected him to be the one to say it, but it made me the happiest girl in the world when he did.

"Kara? You still there?" he laughed quietly.

"Y-yeah..." I whispered. "I love you too Luke. Th-thank you. I hope you sleep well too." My voice sounded terribly nervous, and I was extremely surprised, and relieved, that it didn't crack under all the pressure.

"See you at school, little penguin. Night," he said gently, sounding like he had a huge grin on his face.

"See you then. Now I have to come up with an adorable name for you," I laughed.

"Yeah. Bye." He sounded reluctant to go, but also relieved that he'd called.

"Bye," I said, staying on the phone for a moment longer before clicking the "End Call" icon on the screen. After I'd hung up, I flung myself onto the bed, hugging a pillow against my chest. I laughed then, the sound muffled by the pillow. I lay there, giggling with pure elation and giddiness for about ten minutes before I got up and changed into a baggy shirt and shorts.

As I was about to go to bed, I heard my phone vibrate on the desk. Running over, I saw I had a text from Luke. I unlocked the phone and looked to see what he said. There was a picture of a little penguin with a bow on. Beneath it was a simple "Goodnight :-)". I decided not to respond, sure that if I did I'd get into a conversation with him again.

I locked my phone, turned off the light, then crawled under my sheets. I couldn't sleep now, so I just lay there, staring up at the ceiling, my mind buzzing from the day I had.

After a long time, my eyes drifted shut and I fell into a deep, dreamless sleep.


	16. >Chapter Sixteen<

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this picture is one my close friends drew. I just figured I'd Include it so you could see it.  
> (PS I hope if anyone is reading this you like it so far ^-^)

I spent all of Sunday in my room either drawing, listening to music, doing homework, or texting. I texted Michael and Luke frequently, smiling when my phone buzzed with a new message. I was getting very close with the two of them, especially Luke.

_Me: So what is this dance I've been hearing about on twitter?_

_Luke: Oh. Autumn Formal? Its just like what you Americans have at your high schools. It's our equivalent of homecoming, I guess._

_Me: Have you ever gone?_

_Luke: Yeah. I went last year. It was kinda dumb though._

_Me: Mmmmmmmm_

_Luke: Why the long mmmmmm?_

_Me: Idk :-)_

_Luke: Lol (-:_

_Me: :---------)_

_Luke: Hehehe nice nose. I have something to ask._

_Me: Yeah??_

_Luke: Do you wanna maybe go to autumn formal with me?_

_Me: Of course!_

_Luke: Cool! It isn't until February, but I figure then you'll have time to find a dress or whatever. :-D_

_Me: Aww! Yeah! Thanks Luke. That made me so happy._

_Luke: I'm glad._

_Me: ( <^-^<)_

_Luke: ( >^-^>)_

_Me: Hehehe_

_Luke: You're so adorable._

_Me: Lol you are too. Now I have to do some history homework. So you need to shush._

_Luke: Aw. Alright. Love you._

_I felt myself blush, not used to having a boy say that to me._

_Me: Love you too._

I closed my phone, setting it beside me on the desk as I tried to focus on my history assignment. It was focusing on recent event in Australia, so it was still somewhat foreign to me, seeing as I'd only been here for about a month now.

Wait, only a month? I'd moved here just after New Years, and it was now almost February. I'd come before the school year had begun, but the little bit of summer that I'd been here was very mundane and uneventful.

Yet in a month I'd only made about three friends and made many enemies. Though that wasn't all that many friends for most people, that was the amount I'd had back in America. So I was used to it.

I gave up on the history and decided to draw something. I pulled out one of my leather-bound sketchbooks and opened up to a clean two pages. Setting my pencil to the paper, I started drawing the outline of a feminine figure. I drew a beautiful woman's face, then an idea popped into my head.

Her skin morphed into tree branches and leaves, water droplets on the surfaces of petals. Lilies floated behind her, and once I was done drawing the picture, I added pinks and yellows to the flowers as well as her eyes.

I looked at the clock once it was finished and saw that it was eleven at night. Hadn't I started this at around three?! I closed the sketchbook and slipped it into my schoolbag. I wanted to show the art teacher tomorrow, as she loves seeing what I draw at home.

I turned off the light and crawled into bed, already in shorts and a tee, and was too tired to go do my nightly routine. I fell asleep quickly, my dreams all connected by the roots of a beautiful woman's hair.

~~~~~~~~~~

I walked to my locker the next morning, my sandals hitting the hard floor quietly. I weaved between groups of people as usual, keeping my head down the whole time, but as I tried to get around one boy, he moved in front of me. When I tried again, he simply blocked me again.

Finally looking up, I saw why he stopped me. It was Luke, and he was grinning down at me.

"Hi penguin," he laughed, hugging me. I hugged him back, still not used to the concept of having a boyfriend. "So I guess this means we're together officially?" he muttered into my hair.

"Yeah. I guess I does," I grinned and looked up at him, arms still around him.

"Good. Then that means I can do this," he smiled again before he kissed me softly. I giggled, kissing him back for a moment before pulling away.

"Luke, people will see you kissing me. I don't want your friends to find out. I don't think they'd like that we're dating," I said, my smile faltering slightly.

"Who cares about my friends? If I want to go out with you, I will. Screw them."

I blushed, then nodded. He turned so he was next to me , his arm slung over my shoulders as we started moving toward my locker together.

"So how was your day yesterday?" he asked curiously.

"Pretty good. After my history homework I ended up working on a drawing until eleven. I spent like eight hours on it!" I laughed, moving hair out of my face.

"I don't think I need to even ask if it's good or not. Knowing you, it amazing. What did you draw?"

"I guess I could show you," I shrugged as we arrived at my locker. He took his arm from my shoulders, leaning against the locker next to mine as I unlocked it. I pulled my things from my bag, placing the journal on top before shoving the bag in the locker and shutting it.

"Here," I said and opened to the two-page spread an held it up for him to see. We'd started walking down the hall together, and he stopped in his tracks when he saw it.

"Oh my gosh," he gaped. "Kara, this is amazing!" Luke looked from the drawing to me, then back again. "How are you so good?!"

"Aw look! Suicide Girl has a friend!" Kelsey's voice rang out in front of us. I looked up to see a girl I hadn't expected to be Kelsey. She had long chocolate brown hair, green eyes, and soft features. "Whatcha got there hon?" She snatched the journal from my hand, a smug look on her face.

"Hey!" I cried, reaching for it. But she simply moved away, looking at my drawing. "Give it back!"

"Ha! So _this_ is what you do in your free time. Pretty good," she smirked, showing her friends. "What do you think girls? Should I give it back?"

"Kelsey, are you serious right now?" Luke yelled, grabbing her wrist and whirling her around. "Don't fuck with Kara anymore," he growled, glowering down at her as he plucked the sketchbook from her hand. His eyes seemed to darken and his jaw clenched shut. "Do you understand me?"

Kelsey looked terrified when he'd first taken ahold of her arm, but now a sly smile played on her lips. "I'm making no promises. You don't scare me Lukey," she sneered. "You'll pay for this, bitch," she glared at me as she yanked her hand from his grip. "Let's go girls," she said to her friends, then walked away haughtily.

As Luke turned to me, I just looked at the ground. I didn't even know what I was feeling, there were just so many conflicting emotions. But I kept from flinching as Luke wrapped his arms around me, whispering how sorry he was into my hair.

He'd looked just like he had in my dream...


	17. >Chapter Seventeen<

The first three periods of the day dragged on as I waited for lunch. I just wanted to talk to Luke and Michael. Finally, the ending bell for third period rang and I rose from my seat. Walking out, I bumped into a girl with long, curly black hair, light-ish brown eyes, and a skin tone that was almost like a dark tan.

"Oh, sorry," I apologized, blushing unconsciously.

"It's cool," she laughed. "You're Kara, right?" The girl was slightly taller than me, so I had to look up a bit.

"Yeah. And I'm also really bad at names. What's yours again?" I said awkwardly.

"Oh, it's fine. I'm Malaya Massey. This is the only class we have together, other than lunch, of course," she smiled, flashing her dimples.

"Huh," I said quietly. "Do you sit with anyone at lunch?" We walked toward the cafeteria, nudged along by the crowd of other students.

"Sometimes I sit with a few of my friends from the football team, but other than that normally just my friend Eve," Malaya shrugged.

"Would you like to sit at my table today?" I asked. I'd been trying to be less introverted lately, but it could be really hard sometimes. I had to take baby steps, right?

"Sure. I'd like that!" She smiled and we entered the lunchroom, greeted by the usual clamor of high school students eating and talking. "Do you have to buy today? Cause I am."

"Yeah, I do actually. I forgot to pack a lunch this morning. Wanna go out your things down at the table? Or should we just get in line?"

"Let's put our stuff down. If we're going to have to wait a while, might as well not have to carry our books too." Her accent was soft on her voice when she spoke, and was a unique blend of Irish and Australian.

"So where are you from?"

"My dad is Irish and my mum is African-American. We moved here from Ireland when I was about six, so I've been here a while," she replied as I took her to our table. Neither Michael or Luke were there, so we simply left our books on the table and got in the lunch line.

"That's cool! I'm Italian and Irish, with a little bit of Hispanic too. I'm obviously from the U.S. but I bet you already knew that."

"Yeah. What's Kelsey's problem, anyway? What did you ever do to her?" Malaya looked from me to where Queen Bitch herself sat, surrounded by her little clique.

"I guess she hates me because I exist." I laughed a little at the fact that I'd done nothing to pit Kelsey against me. She just hated me from the start.

"Well don't pay any attention to her and the rest of the Bitch Squad," she laughed as we reached the food.

"What are the rest of their names?" I asked, reaching for an apple and some French toast: Luke had me hooked.

"Well there's Kelsey of course, then Nina and Annie are her right hand girls. Those are really the only three you need to look out for. The rest couldn't remember how to breath without Kelsey," Malaya explained, picking up a piece of pizza and a bottle of water. We went and paid, then walked back to the table to sit.

"Alright. Thanks," I smiled. The guys were at the table now, and Luke was sitting next to where I'd placed my things. I plopped down beside him, smiling a bit as he swallowed his food.

"Hi guys." I had asked Luke if he wanted to sit with us at lunch and he agreed instantly as if he were going to ask himself. "Is it OK if Malaya sits with us too? She in my math class and she's really cool," I asked, looking as she sat down between Michael and I.

"Sounds good," Luke nodded. Michael was looking down at his pasta, and I thought I saw blush on his cheeks.

"Yeah. Sure," he said softly. I shot a glance at Malaya, trying not to grin. She smiled slightly, then took a bite of pizza.

"So that's Michael, and this is Luke," I introduced them.

"Yeah. I've seen you guys around school but never really met you," she shrugged.

We talked all through lunch, laughing and telling stories. It was really nice to have friends that I could joke around with. It almost made me forget about all the problems happening in my life.

Almost.

~~~~~~~~~~

After lunch ended, I kissed Luke goodbye until later, then hugged Malaya before heading to Art with Michael.

"So," I started, watching my feet. "Malaya's really nice, isn't she?" A smile grew in my face as I thought of her nickname for Kelsey and the "Bitch Squad".

"Yeah..." he said quietly. I glanced over and saw he had a small smile on his face as we walked. "She's really cool."

"What do you think we'll do in art today?" I was trying to keep the conversation going so it wouldn't get awkward.

"I don't know. Probably more stuff with drawing people," he shrugged. "I suck at drawing people."

I laughed as we entered the art room. It was one of the biggest classrooms in the school, with a high ceiling, tall windows, and eight long, wooden tables spread about the space. There were student-dyed silk tapestries on the walls, which were also plastered with examples and other student art work. There was no extra space on a single wall, making the whole place feel cozy and inviting.

"I'm sure you can't be _that_ bad, Mikey."

"Well compared to you, I might as well draw stick figures. But I'm still pretty bad," he laughed as well.

"Hello Kara. How are you Michael?" Mrs. Kamora welcomed us from the front of the room.

"Hi," I replied softly.

"Good, how are you?" Michael asked at the same time.

"I'm great, thanks for asking," she smiled. "You two can go grab your sketchbooks and set up. Today we're doing hand models, so grab a wooden hand from the front table and pose it however," she instructed, then went to her desk and grabbed a stack of papers.

"Oh, Mrs. Kamora, I drew something yesterday," I said after a moment.

"You did?" she clapped her hands together. "Would you show me?"

I laughed at her excitement and flipped open the leather-bound sketchbook to the drawing. Walking over, I handed her the book.

"Oh, Kara, this is absolutely marvelous!" she sighed. "The touches of color are just enough, and the detail in the branches is impeccable!" She looked up at me, a smile still on her face. "You are truly an amazing artist, dear."

"Thank you," I blushed and accepted the compliment. "I appreciate that. It's sure took me long enough!" I laughed.

"How long was that?"

"About eight hours. No big deal," I said sarcastically, making her laugh as well.

"You should be very proud of this sweetheart," she handed me the sketchbook again.

"Thank you," I smiled again and took it. Crossing the room, I retrieved my art class sketchbook and a wooden posable hand, then went and sat down next to Michael as others started to trickle in.

At the end of class, there were some varied results of how the hands turned out. Mine were very good, but Michael's? Well, let's just say that he was right when saying he wasn't very good at drawing people or human body parts...


	18. >Chapter Eighteen<

I made it through the rest of the day, though barely. I just wanted to talk to Luke. That's it. We texted back and forth during class, and thankfully neither of us got caught. But it didn't feel the same as talking face-to-face.

When the final bell rang, I quickly made my way to my locker, put my things in my bag, and turned around to go to Luke's locker. I was looking down at my phone, in the middle of typing a response to a text he'd sent me, when I ran into someone. I looked up, panicking a bit, only to find Calum.

He turned around quickly as I muttered an apology and tried to walk away. "Kara, wait," he placed a careful hand on my shoulder. "I want to apologize."

I stopped and looked at him. "What do you mean? Why are you apologizing to me?"

"For the first time we talked. I was being kind of pushy. I'm sorry about that," he smiled.

"It's fine I guess," I shrugged.

"I was just trying to help. Kelsey is a real bitch sometimes."

"Yeah, I know. Thanks." I turned to leave again, but he fell in step with me. I decided not to argue and tell him to leave me alone. It wasn't worth it.

"So," he said awkwardly. "What going on between you and Luke?"

I blushed, looking down. "Um, how come?" I asked quietly.

"Well, everyone seems to be talking about it..."

"Really?!" I said, mortified. "What are people saying?" Did I even really want to know?

"Just that you're together. Why?" he looked down at me curiously.

"It's just...nothing." I shook my head. "Yeah, we're going out if that's why you asked."

"Kara," he started slowly. "Be careful with Luke. He's not as perfect as he seems. I don't want you to get hurt..." Calum sounded sincere, but his words ignited a fire inside me.

"What does it matter to you?" I said defensively. "You barely know me!" I looked up at him angrily as I stopped near a corner in the hall.

"It's just... Luke doesn't have the best reputation when it comes to being a heartbreaker," he explained.

"Well, I'll take my chances then." I whirled around and stormed off towards Luke. I spotted him standing at his locker and tried to calm down before he saw me like this.

"Hi Luke," I mumbled as I stopped beside him. He smiled and wrapped his arms around me.

"Hey Kar," he kissed my hair. Stepping back, he looked at me. "You ok?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. Don't worry about it," I shrugged. It was probably in my best interest not to tell him what Calum said.

"You sure?" A small line appeared between his eyebrows as he frowned slightly.

"Yeah," I forced a smile.

"Okay..." He took my hand in his, leading me outside to the parking lot. "What do you have for homework?"

"I have chemistry, and literature. That's it though."

"I have music theory, algebra, and history," he sighed. We were approaching my car, but he still gripped my hand.

"I'm probably going to end up taking forever on mine," I said honestly. "Chemistry makes me cringe. I suck at it."

"If you need help, I rock at chem," he winked.

"Right," I rolled my eyes and laughed.

"No, seriously. I'm good at science," he said in a truthful tone. "My mom is a math teacher and she taught me everything I'd ever need to know about it, which helps in science," he shrugged.

"If I have trouble I'll text you, ok?" I said as we reached my car.

"Or better yet, you could call me. Then I'd get to listen to your beautiful voice," he replied as I turned to look at him.

"We'll see," I winked. He backed me up against the car then, placing his hands on my cheeks. I looked up at him, my breath stopped. He leaned down and placed a loving kiss upon my mouth, stroking my jaw with his fingers. I kissed right back, but he broke off before it got too crazy.

I grinned as he took a step back, then opened my car door. "I love you Luke. I'll most likely talk to you later." You climbed into the driver's seat.

"Love you too, Kara," he smiled back and shut the door for me. He waved as I backed out, looking like an idiot but not seeming to care.

I drove home with the stupidest smile on my face.


	19. >Chapter Nineteen<

The next few weeks blurred together in anticipation of autumn formal. Each week consisted of the following:  
• Wake up  
• Get dressed and eat  
• Go to school  
• Enjoy lunchtime with friends  
• Go back to class  
• Go home  
• Do homework  
• Shower  
• Go to sleep  
• Repeat

My life was getting way too repetitive. Until a week before the dance, that is.

~~~~~~~~~~

"So, class, today we will be doing a group activity. You'll need to get into groups of threes," Mrs. Kamora instructed. Michael and I glanced at each other even though we were seated right beside one another. Who else would be in the group though?

"Um, hi, Kara?" came a wispy voice from across the table. I looked over to find Eve standing there, looking extremely uncomfortable. "Would I be able I join your group?" she asked quietly, tucking a strand of her maple brown hair behind her ear.

"Of course! I'd love that," I smiled, welcoming her to the group.

"Oh, thanks," she smiled. Her eyes crinkled at the edges, adding to her overall impression of innocence and adorable-ness. She sat down across from me on the bench, smoothing down her skirt and pulling her hands up into her sweater sleeves.

"No problem. I'm really glad you asked, actually. I've been meaning to talk to you for a while. I'm not sure if you remember or not, but that one day when I was getting ice cream, I saw you at the store. Ever since then I've been wanting to talk," I smiled warmly.

"Yeah, I remember that," she nodded. "I was a bit too shy to say much more than hello..."

"Oh no, it's totally alright," I assured her.

"Does everybody have a group?" called Mrs. Kamora from up front. She was met with a chorus of affirmative grumbles. "Alright, I hope you chose people you work well with because you will be working in these groups for the rest of this term, possibly a bit into next term depending on how far we get," she nodded.

"Now, class, the project we will be doing is a very special one. It will require both art skills, as well as communication skills. You will be making portraits of each of your group mates, but not in the way you'd think. You will not be drawing them how you see them, but how you feel about them." She clicked the mouse to advance to the next slide of the PowerPoint she was showing. A few examples popped up.

The drawings were amazing, not made up of lines, colors, textures, or anything in a normal portrait. No, the people were made of words. They seemed to be describing what the person was like, things that they had said, things that they liked. Each separate group of characteristics made up a different part of the face, which looked like a real person.

The eyes were made of their physical characteristics, the cheeks made of their personalities, the forehead of what they believed in, the nose of their background. The lips were comprised of things they had said, the ears of their favorite sounds, the eyebrows and hair constructed of words others used to describe that person. And each group was colored how it would look on the person. For example, the eye in the words were blue for one girl, her skin dark tan and her hair long and blonde.

"As you can see, this project will require a vast amount of knowledge about your partners. So I would suggest setting up times to meet and talk about the things you'll need to know. I'll pass out the packet of things I'd like you to have for this, but don't worry about how thick it is. You will not need to use all of the items listed."

When we received our packets, and I sighed from the fact that we were picking what we would do. It had to be close to ten pages. I flipped through it, finding things like favorite traits in others, ethnic background, personality, family, and so many others.

After explaining it a bit more, Mrs. Kamora let us discuss which information we'd like to use. The three of us settled on personality, physical features, race, beliefs, favorite things, and family. After that, the class bell rang, signaling that we had to leave now.

"It's really nice to finally talk to you, Eve, I smiled. "Are you going to autumn formal?" I asked as we gathered our things.

"Yeah. But I still have to get a dress," she nodded shyly. Hopefully this project would get her to open up a bit...

"Would you like to go dress shopping with me?" I asked with a smile.

"I'd love to!" she agreed happily.

"Alright, what about tomorrow? Say, noon maybe?" Tomorrow was Saturday, exactly one week from the dance. "We could meet at that little boutique. The one down the street from the Chocolate Koala?"

"That sounds awesome," Eve smiled, looking genuinely excited.

"Alright! See you tomorrow then," I replied, hugging her lightly before we went our separate ways.


	20. >Chapter Twenty<

"I like this one," I tugged a dress from the rack. It was pastel blue, with a long flowy skirt and thin straps. "What do you think?"

She came over and ran her finger over over the soft material. "It's gorgeous. Should I go try it on?" she asked, her eyes lighting up.

"Of course!" I grinned. At the moment we were searching for Eve's dress, then we'd look for mine. It was slightly more difficult to find one for her on account of her slight frame, but I felt more comfortable with her already.

"Alright," she nodded. We walked over to the dressing rooms and she entered one. A few minutes later she opens the door. "I like this one," came her sweet voice as she finally emerged.

The dress looked amazing on her. It hugged her small waist and flared out, looking a bit like a flower.

"Yeah, but do you _love_ it?" I asked, noting her word choice.

"Well," she hesitated. "It's beautiful, but I'm not sure if it's really... _me_ , you know?" She looked down, playing with the skirt.

"If you aren't sure we could always keep looking," I shrugged. "We have all day."

"I actually saw one that caught my eye, but I'm not sure. It's yellow so I might look like a lemon..." she giggled.

"You should try it on!" I grinned. "Should I go get it?"

"Would you mind?" Eve looked up.

"Not at all! Where is it?"

"Um, I think it was over by the window. It's short and yellow. You can't miss it," she smiled widely. I nodded and retrieved it for her. "Thanks," she said as I handed her the dress.

She backed into the dressing room, quickly changing into the dress. A minute later, she emerged in the new dress, a smile plastered to her face.

"What do you think?" she asked curiously.

I stood there, stumbling for words, before I thought of what to say. "It's perfect." And it was. The delicate yellow fabric hugged her waist, a sash circling her torso beneath the bodice. There was a jeweled embellishment where the sash and the single chiffon strap, adding sparkle to the otherwise fairly simple piece.

"You think so?" she laughed, spinning slowly. She looked at herself in the full-length mirror and gasped. "It's beautiful..." she whispered.

"I think you found your dress," I grinned.

"Now to find yours!" She went and changed back into her jeans, t-shirt and cardigan. Holding her dress carefully we made our way back to the dresses.

"I want something simple..." I muttered, more to myself than anything else. "Simple and flowy..."

We looked and looked, trying on several dresses, before Eve held up one I hadn't noticed before. "What about this?" she grinned.

I stared, taking it in. The fabric was white and sheer, with a slip underneath. It was airy and light, with intricate stitching on the shoulders. The neckline was modest, but I didn't care. It was perfect.

"I have a good feeling about this one," I replied with an equally large grin.

"Go try it on then!" she handed me the dress and sent me toward the dressing room. I entered it, locking the door behind me. Undressing quickly, I slipped the dress on. It brushed my thighs, and the neckline was high, but I couldn't stop smiling once I looked in the mirror. It somehow made my pale skin look darker, as well as making my hair pop out.

"What do you think?" I opened the door to show Eve. She grinned, her eyes lighting up.

"I love it! Though I feel like it could use something..." she thought for a moment, before scampering away and returning with a slim belt in her hands. "This," she put it around my waist.

"Great idea Eve!" I thanked her and went to look in the larger mirror. The dress suited my figure beautifully, and I knew this was it. "We both have our dresses," I looked at her excitedly.

"Let's go ring out," she nodded. I changed and we went to buy our things. I bought the belt Eve had picked out as well as the dress, while she just got her dress. After we checked out, we decide to go and grab a coffee at the Chocolate Koala.

"Are you excited for the dance?" Eve asked as she took a sip of her passionfruit tea (she didn't like coffee).

"Yeah," I nodded. I heard the door open behind me, but naturally I didn't look back to see who it was. It could be anyone, right? "I can't wait to see what Luke looks like..." I blushed.

"So you two really are a thing?" Eve raised an eyebrow and smiled.

"Yeah, I guess so," I took a sip of coffee. Looking out the window, I watched people pass by, some hurrying off to unknown places, others strolling past leisurely.

"Kara?" came a voice to my right. My gaze snapped over, and I found Ashton standing there with a smile an a cup in his hand.

"Hi Ashton," I smiled. Standing I went to give him a somewhat awkward hug.

"How have you been?" he asked quietly looking down at me with veiled concern on his face.

"Better. Much better,' I nodded and looked down at my feet.

"I'm really glad. That Luke guy seemed worried..." he smiled slightly.

"Yeah, well, we're kinda going out now..." I blushed and looked up at him.

"Really?" he grinned. His eyes glanced over at something, and his expression changed slightly.

Following his gaze, I saw he was looking at Eve. "Hey, Eve, this is my friend Ashton," I introduced him with a smile.

"H-Hi..." she blushed and smiled at him. "I'm Eve- well,Kara said that already, but... yeah..." she stuttered, making me curious about why.

"It's fine," Ashton laughed. "So, if I remember correctly, its about time for autumn formal, no?" he said and took a sip of his drink.

"Yeah, we were actually just getting our dresses," I pointed over my shoulder to the boutique.

"I'm sure your dates will be speechless," he winked.

"Of the two of us, only I have a date," I shrugged. "But we're going in a group so it doesn't really matter."

"I'm sure anyone would be lucky to go with you, Eve," he smiled at her, causing her cheeks to darken further.

"Do you want to sit?" I asked, nodding to the table.

"Sorry, but I've gotta run. My boss needs me at the studio. You should text me sometime and we can go grab a bite," he suggested.

"Yeah. That would be nice."

"Cool," he nodded. "It was nice meeting you Eve," he said to her, his own cheeks reddening slightly.

"You too," she replied softly.

"Bye Kara," he hugged me quickly before hurrying off.

"Bye!" I called and sat back down. "You alright?" I asked Eve with a small smile.

"Yeah," she nodded, trying to act normal. "He's kinda cute, that's all..."

"Aw, Eve! That's so adorable!" I said excitedly. "What about going to the dance with Ashton?"

"I'm sure he'd be busy, plus I hardly know him..." she shrugged.

"I'll take that as a yes. I'll invite him to come with the group and you two could hang out. If you're comfortable with that, I mean," I added quickly.

"Alright," she smiled, looking intently at her cup. "I guess it couldn't hurt..."

"Awesome!" I grinned. "He's only nineteen, so he could pass for a twelfth year," I thought aloud. "This could work."


	21. >Chapter Twenty-One<

I drove home after about another hour of talking with Eve. We just sat and chatted, drinking our coffee and tea, and once our drinks ran out, we just talked more. I learned tons about her, and told her tons about myself.

Now, I knew her favourite color was pale green, her favourite band was Echosmith, her favourite class was photography, she wanted to be an artist when she grew up, and so many more things. I never thought this shy, petite girl could have so much to say.

When I reached my house, I entered carrying my dress. I had hardly stepped through the door when mom was on top of me.

"Oh my goodness Kar! I need to see what you got!" she hovered by my side excitedly.

"Alright mom," I laughed. "Let me put down my bag first." I walked into the kitchen and set my purse down on the table. I then unzipped the garment bag covering the dress to show her.

She gasped, coming to look at it closer. "Oh Kara, it's beautiful!" she mused, smiling at me.

"Mom, you haven't even seen it on me yet!" I laughed.

"Well try it on for me!" she said eagerly.

"Alright then," I picked up the dress, smiling at her enthusiasm. "I'll be right back," I said, making my way up to my room to change. I did so as fast as I could to show her. When I did, she squealed like the teenage girl I always knew was inside of her.

"Kara! You look stunning!" She wiped at tears pooling in her eyes.

"Thank you mom, but you don't have to cry. It's not prom or anything," I reminded her.

"I know. But you've come so far from that girl you came her as. You're talking to people, going to a school dance, you have a boyfriend..." She wrapped her arms around me, hugging me close. "I'm so proud of you, she whispered.

"Thanks mama," I smiled to myself.

~~~~~~~~~~

"Hiya," I smiled as I saw Luke. I ran over, wrapping my arms around him.

"Hi," he laughed, kissing my head. "It's nice to see you so happy," he mumbled into my hair.

"It's nice to see you not wearing long sleeves for once," I looked up at him. And it was true. His arms were showing for once thanks to the almost ninety degree weather (thirty-something degrees in Celsius since that's what they use here). He had on his "YOU COMPLETE MEss" shirt, which always made me laugh.

"Yeah, well, if I had my arms covered today I think I'd die of heatstroke," he smiled down at me. "Lets go do stuff," he said happily as he took my hand.

Thanks to it being Sunday afternoon, we decided to hang out. We walked down the street hand-in-hand past the pizza shop we had eaten at. I had déjà vu then, thinking back to when I saw that couple walking by with their hands linked. I had wondered if that would be us one day, and here we were, not even a full two weeks later, doing just that.

"We should go to that park nearby," I suggested and leaned my head against his arm as we made our way down the sidewalk.

"That would be great," he agreed. We kept talking as we walked to the park. He asked how my weekend had been going and I told him I'd gotten my dress for the dance. "I can't wait to see it!" he grinned.

"I can't wait to show you," I grinned back.

"Wanna go on the swings?" Luke asked with a childish smile as we reached the park. There was a set of maybe ten swings to one side along with a playground.

"Of course!" I laughed. "Race you," I said before I took off running. He beat me on account of my shorter legs, but I really didn't care. As we reached our destination, I got up onto a swing, standing on the seat as I held the chains. I looked down at Luke with a grin, loving the fact that I was taller than him like this.

"I beat you," he said smugly.

"Great for you," I rolled my eyes and leaned back and forth to start moving.

He climbed up on the swing next to me, having to bend his knees slightly so he didn't hit his head on the bar above us. I laughed a bit at how innocent he was acting. It contrasted greatly with his appearance, the kiddish nature contained in a tattooed, pierced body.

"Luke?" I asked after a moment of almost pure silence that was only broken by the birds and the squeak of the swings.

"Yeah Kara?" he looked at me with a smile.

"Tell me about your tattoos," I said quietly. "I already know about the skull, but what about the others? Do they have stories too?"

He jumped of his swing, grabbing a chain to stop it as he sat down. "Each one has a story," he confirmed. "Each one represents an event in my life. Which would you like to hear first?"

I got down and sat on the swing as well, leaning toward him. "This one," I placed a finger on his forearm. The three birds on his skin flew toward the skull on the other side of his arm, the closest one being the biggest while the furthest was the smallest.

"That was one of my first ones. Each bird represents one of my family members. This one is my mom," he pointed to the largest bird, "The middle is my oldest brother, and the last is my other brother. They're flying toward the skull because they helped me through that time in my life, and it's like the birds are coming to the rescue." Luke's voice was somewhat thick as he spoke, and I knew that this tattoo had true meaning to him.

"And this one?" I trailed my finger up his arm to the dream catcher in the crook of his elbow. "What does this mean?"

He smiled, looking from the ink to me. "That one is supposed to remind me to 'catch my dreams', so to speak. I figured a dream-catcher would depict that well."

"I love that idea," I grinned. "Very clever. And this?" I gestured to the group of roses on his upper arm. In the middle, there was a banner that read "Kills", which must mean something.

"Life always kills us even though it seems like a beautiful thing. Hence the roses; they're beautiful, but the second you try to pick one you get a thorn in your hand."

I gestured to many other tattoos, learning each story. As he moved his other arm to stretch, I noticed a circular bit of ink on the inside of his bicep. "What's that?" I pointed.

"This one?" he asked and placed a finger on it. I nodded, looking at it again. Upon closer inspection, I realized it was a compass. "It's supposed to help me 'navigate through life', but sometimes I still get lost," he shrugged. "Any others you'd like to know about?" he smiled.

"One more," I scanned the remaining ink for one I found interesting. I settled on a pair of quotation marks on the side of his neck. "How about these?" I traced the small marks.

"The quotes?" Luke's voice hitched slightly, as if the tattoo brought him bad memories. "That's what my dad said to me before he left..." he looked at his hands, a delicate frown playing on his lips.

"But there aren't any wor- oh..." I realized mid-sentence what he meant.

"Yeah. He didn't say anything. He just walked out. I haven't seen him since I was five."

"I'm so sorry," I muttered. "I thought it would just be a scenario like mine when you originally told me it was just you and your mom..."

"I think we need some ice cream. Enough intense conversation for one day," Luke said after a moment. He stood from his swing, smiling down at me. He stepped in front of me, taking hold of the chains of my own swing. I had to look up at him, tilting my head back to see his face. He gently kissed my forehead, before stepping back. "Let's go."

I stood and brushed a bit of dirt from my legs, before I followed Luke from the park. We walked to the same ice cream shop as last time, and I got the same thing as before. We sat outside and talked over plans for the dance, and I informed him that I'd invited Ashton to tag along.

"So you think Eve likes him?" Luke grinned as he finished off his ice cream.

"Yeah, I know it," I nodded. "I thought it was so cute. They both got all nervous and awkward. Eve turned cherry red, though I won't tell her."

"That's so sweet. This Ashton guy sounds pretty awesome. I've heard about him before since he was only two years above me, but I never knew him."

"He's so nice. I think you two will be really good friends," I nodded and finished my ice cream as well. Looking at my phone, I realized I was late getting home. "Crap. I've gotta go," I looked back up at Luke. "My mom wanted me home ten minutes ago so we could have dinner together."

"Yeah. I should probably get going too," he agreed and stood. I did the same, and we walked to our cars. "See you at school," he wrapped his arms around me and kissed my head.

"Bye," I said into his shirt. Taking a step back, I kissed him on the cheek, then got in my car.

As I drove home, I thought about the things he told me today. The pieces of his past that he shared with me. I smiled to myself and kept driving.

Luke Hemmings truly made me happy.


	22. >Chapter Twenty-Two<

Sitting on my bed later that night, I scrolled through tumblr in search of a good room idea. Mom had brought up the topic of redoing my bland room, so I decided to look for inspiration. "Hey Soul Sister" by Train played in my headphones, the light tone lifting my mood even. higher than it already was.

I jumped as my phone vibrated. A text popped up on the top of the screen, and I saw it was from an unknown number. Tapping the icon, I read the message:

_Hiya. Sorry about this. I forgot to get your number. It's Malaya by the way. Michael gave me your number. :)_

I smiled. Thankfully it wasn't some random creep who was texting me.

 _Haha. It's cool. What's up?_ I replied a moment later.

_Not much. Sitting at home watching Netflix. How about you?_

_Just looking at room ideas. Mine is super boring..._

_That sounds kinda fun. Fine anything interesting?_

_Yeah. There's this one that's really cool. It still has white walls but its really artsy and it would fit with what I was going for. But I'm not sure._ I sent her a picture of what I'd found. (See attached picture)

_Looks like it could be cool._

_That's what I thought too. I really like how it has that lazy but artsy feel ya know?_

_Yeah. Do you want any help with whatever you decide to do?_

_That would be awesome!! ^-^_

_Just hit me up with a date and time and I'll be there girl!_

I laughed and looked at the time as the song changed. It was nearly eleven an I was exhausted, so I replied to Malaya.

_I think I'm gonna get some sleep. Can't be too tired for tomorrow. -__-_

_Same. I just finished season four of AHS and I'm super sleepy._

_I didn't know you liked AHS!! We have much to talk about tomorrow! :D_

_Evan is life..._

_Yes. Yes he is. Now let's go to bed._

_Night!_

_G'night_

_Is that's racist joke? Really? -_______-_

_;D_

I locked my phone and set it beside my bed once I'd paused the music. I then got up to brush my teeth and got ready for bed. That night I had dreams of ink and words, darkness with a story behind it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Hey cutie," Luke said as he came to lean on the locker next to mine. "How'd you sleep last night?" he asked.

"Not bad," I shrugged and put my things in my locker. "I had a weird dream, but that's all I can remember about it..."

"I'm glad," he smiled. "Let's head to class, yeah?"

"Sure. I honestly didn't really feel like coming to school today, but I have to talk to Malaya so I did," I admitted as I shut my locker and turned to him.

"So you didn't come so you could see your awesome boyfriend?" Luke pouted dramatically, making me laugh quietly.

"Nope. Just to talk to Malaya," I said innocently and smiled up at him.

"Wow, thanks Kara," he scoffed. "I appreciate that." We started walking toward our first classes, which for me was going to be the worst class of the day. I'd be surprised if I didn't fall asleep.

"Luke!" came a somewhat familiar voice from behind us. Luke paused and looked behind us, a grin appearing on his face as he saw someone who he was apparently friends with. I turned around as well to find none other than Calum rushing towards us. "Hi Kara," he greeted me awkwardly as he stopped before Luke. "Hey mate," Calum clapped Luke on the back.

"Mornin' Cal," Luke replied. He looked at me then, throwing an arm around Calum's shoulders. "Kara, this is my best friend, Calum."


	23. >Chapter Twenty-Three<

"Wait..... You guys are best friends?" I asked, thoroughly confused.

"Yeah, what's wrong?" Luke asked just as confused.

"Oh, n-nothing..." I shook my head. Calum hadn't really been rude the two times I talked to him. I just got a weird vibe from him, I guess.

"Alright then." Luke shrugged and turned back to his friend. "We still on for Friday?" he punched Calum's arm happily.

"Of course we are. Since when have we missed a Friday night gathering?" Calum rolled his eyes.

"True. True."

"Is autumn formal this Saturday or next Saturday?" I asked in confirmation.

"This one. I can't wait to see you in a dress," Luke grinned and let his arm drop from his friend's shoulders. "You're going to be so beautiful," he pulled me to him, placing a kiss on my head.

"And I'm pretty pumped to see you all dressed up too."

"Okay lovers. Let's not be late now," Calum complained beside us, making bosh Luke and I laugh.

"Fine," Luke sighed and took my hand in his. "His loss though," he muttered in my ear, causing me to bite back a laugh. We made our way toward the science wing, where I had Chemistry.

"This is me," I said as we reached the room. "Time to be bored out of my mind."

"Have fun," Luke laughed before kissing my head and leaving for his class. I entered my own, sat at my desk, and got out a sketch pad. I opened to a new page and started sketching.

Since I was in Chemistry, I decided to draw atoms in the order of the Periodic Table. Yes, that's how boring this class was.

I'd been drawing for a while, and class had started a long time ago, when I heard my name.

"Ms. Jennings!" said the teacher, Mr. Tendim as he tapped on my paper irritatedly. "I asked you a question," he repeated as I looked up, obviously embarrassed. "But you were too busy doodling..." He glanced down at my paper and stopped.

"I'm sorry sir-" I began.

"Is this the Periodic Table?" he looked at me, impressed.

"Um, yeah. But it's atoms I each element..." I replied quietly.

"And you have this memorised?" I nodded, and he chuckled, shaking his head. "I'll let it slide this time, but don't let me catch you doing it again. Got it?"

"Yes sir," I nodded, shutting the book and putting it under my chair with the rest of my things.

"Now, as I was asking before, what is the most reactive element?" he asked as he made his way back to the front of the class.

"Fluorine," I answered instantly.

"Good! Now class..." The rest of the class dragged on, then it was off to Math (I still wasn't used to calling it Maths...), German, then lunch, Art, English, and Study Hall. Hopefully Math and German would go by fast...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Good job Kara," Malaya laughed, taking a bite of her cookie. "Mr. Tendim is, like, the hardest teacher to pis off. You must have really been ignoring him!"

"It's not my fault that class is boring as hell!" I said in defense, making everyone else laugh as well.

The table seemed extra crowded today, as had myself, Luke, Michael, Malaya, Eve, and Calum. As antisocial as I usually was, I actually didn't mind the conversation and company.

"So, is everyone excited for autumn formal?" Michael asked through a mouthful of pizza.

"I am," Eve nodded.

"Same." Luke smiled at me, making me do the same.

"I can't wait to go out for food," Mikey grinned. "That'll be the best part!"

I rolled my eyes, getting up to throw out my trash. As I walked over to the trash can, I noticed Kelsey glaring at me. I averted my eyes, hurrying back to my seat.

As I sat down, I felt Luke bristle beside me. "What?" I looked at him.

"Nothing," he shrugged. "Kelsey was looking at you, wasn't she?" he added softly after a moment.

"Yeah. So?" I turned my gaze to the table. "I'm fine."

"Alright. So, Mikey," he looked at the red-haired human vacuum. "You going to the dance with anyone?"

"I don't know." Michael practically turned as red as his hair. "Maybe..."

"Who?" Malaya asked curiously, a bit of sadness tingeing her voice.

"Well, um... maybe, ya know, if you want..... Would you like to go with me?" he asked her, and I smile at how awkward he was. It was so endearing.

"Sure!" Malaya was blushing as well, a huge smile plastered on her face.

"Cool," Michael smiled. "What about you Eve? You going with anyone?"

"No, I don't think so. The only person I'd possibly want to go with doesn't really go here anymore..." she shook her head.

"And you Cal?" Luke smiled at his friend across the table.

"Yeah, I'm going with Petra. It'll probably be one of our last dates though. I'm getting kinda sick of her," he shrugged. Player much? Why would anyone just say they were getting _sick_ of their boyfriend or girlfriend?! That's so rude...

"Ah, I see." Luke nodded just as the bell rang. We all got up, said bye, and went to our next classes. Michael and Eve joined me as we walked to Art.

"How about that Calum guy?" Michael scoffed. "Who does that? Asking their girlfriend to a dance, then just dumping them 'cause they're done with them..."

"I know. It's just wrong!" I agreed.

"They haven't even been together that long, either. That's what also bothers me."

We kept talking as we made our way to fifth period. Entering the room, we found new art taped up on the walls. They all seemed to be examples of the same project, as there was a similarity between all of them: they were all parts of the human body. Arms, legs, hands, shoulders, feet, backs, stomachs, they were beautiful.

We sat through an explanation of the project, and I found it was what I had guessed. We had to draw any (appropriate) part of the body that we wished, and we had to make it unique somehow.

I immediately knew what I would do, and I could clearly see it in my mind. I would draw an arm, and it would be special because it would be wreathed in flowering plants.

Once we started, I ended up finishing mine in one class period. Everyone else would have to finish tomorrow. It turned out wonderfully, and as I handed it in, I felt pride swell in me. It looked so realistic, and very impressive.

Gorgeous, really...


	24. >Chapter Twenty-Four<

The next several days went by in a blur of excitement, boredom, and over-dramatic dance proposals. I witnessed everything from giant signs, to flowers and chocolate. There was even one boy who blasted music from a portable speaker and gave a curly-headed girl a bouquet of daisies, saying some cheesy lines that had to do with the songs, I guess. It was honestly so adorable.

"I think we girls should get together tomorrow to get ready for the dance," I suggested at lunch on Friday. "The guys can come get us once we're ready."

"I think that's a great idea!" Malaya nodded. "Where should we meet up?"

"You two could come to my house. I think my mom will die if she doesn't meet you," I laughed.

"Sounds good to me," Eve smiled from across the table.

"Cool. You could come over whenever, my mom should be home all day tomorrow."

"Alright!" Malaya nodded as the bell rang. "Bye guys," she said standing up.

The rest of us followed suit, and I turned to Luke before leaving. "Bye Luke," I smiled up at him.

"Bye Kar. See you after school," he smiled back and kissed my forehead before we headed to our next classes.

••••••••••••••••••••

"Make sure you get their faces proportional!" Ms. Kamora said loudly as we worked on outlining our partner's faces. I was drawing Eve, she was drawing Michael, and Michael was drawing me. I was excited to see how each one turned out, even if they sucked.

"So Mikey, how excited are you for tomorrow?" I asked as I drew the curve of Eve's jaw.

"Pretty excited. How about you?" He sounded like he was smiling, but I didn't look. Models have to be still after all.

"I can't wait to see Luke all dressed up," I laughed. "Oh and Eve, Ashton can come. He texted me last night that he was coming for sure."

"Okay," she nodded slightly, and her cheeks turned a delicate pink. I smiled.

We continued like this for the rest of class, then before I knew it Saturday had arrived and Malaya and Eve were knocking on the front door.

I rushed downstairs to open the door, but mom beat me to it.

"Hi girls, I'm guessing you're the friends Kara invited over?" She smiled widely at them, welcoming them in.

"Yes we are," Malaya nodded with a grin. "I'm Malaya Massey," she introduced herself.

"I'm Eve Pulker," Eve said quietly after Malaya.

"Well girls, make yourselves at home. You can go on upstairs and do whatever you'd like. Call if you need anything," mom nodded and smiled before leaving us to our own devices.

"Hey guys," I smiled and hugged them each, then we headed upstairs, where they laid their dresses down on the bed. "So. What should we do for the-" I paused to look at the time. "Five hours that we have? I don't think getting ready should take five hours."

"Wow, when you said you needed some interest in here, I didn't imagine your room was so white..." Malaya laughed and looked around.

"Yeah. It's kinda bad," I agreed.

"Is that artwork in there?" Eve asked, curiously pointing to my many sketchbooks.

"Yeah. You can look if you want. Just know that I've drawn some pretty weird things before," I nodded. She picked one out and started slowly flipping through the pages. Every now and then she'd make a comment about one thing or another.

"So, is your dress pretty?" Malaya asked, as she still hasn't seen my dress.

"It's gorgeous. It's white and flowy and just so cute. What about yours?"

"I can just show you," she grinned and opened her garment bag. Inside lay a beautiful purple dress that looked a bit shorter than knee-length, and it had a high neckline but no sleeves. Around the waist was a beaded belt, and the skirt looked like is would move at the slightest provocation.

"It's beautiful!" I grinned at her.

"Hey, Kara?" Eve said softly as she looked closely at a drawing. "Is this... L-Luke?"

"What?" My gaze snapped over to her.

"Is this Luke?" She asked again, turning the sketchbook so we could see the drawing of Luke from my dream.

I sighed, stepping over to sit on my hanging chair. "Yeah it is. But it's not what you'd expect. I had this dream- well, more like a nightmare, and I woke up, drew what I saw in it, and that's what happened," I pointed to the drawing.

"It's cool, but I don't think I'd show Luke if I were you," Malaya said.

"I wasn't planning on showing anyone but I forgot it was in there," I shrugged. "Guess it would have happened eventually."

We talked for about two more hours, then decided we should start getting ready. Makeup was first, and I went with a simple smokey eye, red lip stain (which was put on right before the boys came), winged eyeliner, and mascara.

Eve chose a warm brown eyeshadow, along with eyeliner, mascara, and soft pink lip gloss. Malaya went with a light, shimmery purple eyeshadow, eyeliner, mascara, and a darker red lip stain. After about an hour and a half we were done with that and moved on to our hair.

Malaya wanted to straighten her hair, a task that took nearly half an hour but turned out wonderfully. Eve decided on a simple French braid with a small yellow ribbon at the end. I chose to leave my hair the way it was, slightly curling some parts to give it more interest. We all hair sprayed our heads before going out to change. It took us the remaining hour and fifteen minutes to finish getting ready, and soon there was a ring of the doorbell from down stairs.

I stood from where I'd been sitting, a bit unsteady in the heels mom let me borrow, but regaining my balance quickly. "They're here!" I said excitedly as I grabbed my small clutch.

"I can't wait to see how Mikey cleaned up," Malaya grinned.

"I just can't wait to eat!" Eve smiled widely.

"Preach girl!" Malaya agreed dramatically, making us all laugh.

"Let's go," I smiled as I heard voices downstairs. We made our way out of my room and down the hall to the top of the stairs. The first thing I saw was Luke. And boy did he look amazing.

His dress shirt was crisp and pure white, pulling slightly over his chest and upper arms, a silky black tie hung from his neck, and his hands were pushed into the pockets of his black skinny jeans. I wouldn't have complained about his outfit even if he were getting married.

My eyes connected with his, and we both smiled widely. His hair was styled into his usual quiff, and I could just see the quotation marks on the side of his neck from under the collar of his shirt.

I made my way down the stairs as quick as I could without looking desperate (or tripping), and wrapped my arms around Luke as soon as I was on the floor. He wore a different scent tonight, a richer, somewhat spicier smell that made my head swoon. I inhaled deeply, loving every second of breath.

"You look astonishing Kara," he bent down to whisper. His lips pressed against the skin beneath my ear, and I shivered slightly.

"I could say the same for you," I laughed softly.

He pulled back to look at me. "I hope you don't mind the skinny jeans. Dress pants just don't really do it for me," he grinned.

"I don't mind the jeans, but I did notice you smell different?" I raised an eyebrow.

"Is it good? I just got it?" He laughed, his coming to hold mine.

"I love it," I assured him. He nodded and kissed my forehead softly.

"Hey, Kara, you look awesome!" Mikey said from beside us. I chuckled and looked over to see the now blue-haired boy grinning at us. "We also match now," he joked.

"Yeah! We do, don't we," I laughed. Mikey wore a black dress shirt, along with black skinny jeans, black Converse, and a purple tie. It looked very elegant, honestly.

"Hey, watch it Clifford. You're both already taken," Luke joke from beside me, making us all laugh.

"Don't worry Hemmings, I know you'll kill me if I try anything," Michael laughed.

"Hey Kara!" I turned to find Ashton behind me. I grinned and hugged him tightly.

"Thank you for coming Ash," I said softly in his ear before letting go.

"No problem Kara," he murmured back, then released me. He looked good, in a blazer, a white shirt, a black bow tie, and black skinny jeans, as well as slightly dressier shoes than Luke and Michael's Converse.

"Picture time!" Mom called as she walked in with her camera. "First we'll do a group shot, then each couple together. How does that sound?"

Pictures went by in a blink, then we were off to the dance. We decided to get food afterwards, which at the time sounded like a good idea.

For now though, it was off to the dance.


	25. >Chapter Twenty-Five<

<Luke's POV>

I sat beside Kara on the way to school, and I couldn't stop looking at her. The only way her hair framed her gentle face, how her hazel brown eyes stood out because of the dark makeup surrounding them, everything about her was beautiful. Everything.

"Who's ready to go endure several hours of tasteless music and horrible, very inappropriate dance moves?!" Michael called from the driver's seat. We were all in the large van he had for some reason. It was big enough to fit all of us but Calum and Petra, who were going to dinner before hand anyway. I honestly felt bad for the poor girl, getting led on by him. But that's Cal for you.

"Of course," Ashton laughed from behind us. "That is definitely something I didn't miss about school."

I turned in my seat to look at the older boy. "So what do you do since you're not in school anymore?" I asked curiously.

"I work at a video shop. I used to work at KFC but they kinda fired me for always drumming on the counter," he grinned.

"You're a drummer?" I raised my eyebrows.

"Yeah. It's my passion, honestly. I've always wanted to be in a band but I don't really know anyone who can play instruments..." he shrugged.

" I play guitar," I smiled. "We should jam sometime!"

"I play guitar too!" Michael volunteered from in front of us. "Can I join?"

"Yeah man," Ashton laughed. We pulled into the parking lot, finding the closest spot we could before exiting the van. I got out on the same side as Kara, helping her step out as her heels looked like they would drag her to the ground at any moment.

"Thanks," she smiled as I closed the door behind me. "I probably would've fallen on my face..."

"No problem Kar," I smiled and kissed her head. She laughed softly before we started walking in. The music was audible from outside, the bass and beats pounding through the concrete walls.

"I can hear the tastelessness already," Malaya said, dramatically placing a hand on her forehead as she closed her eyes and tilted her head back. "It might be the death of me..."

We all burst into laughter, and I couldn't help but notice this was one of the first times I'd really heard Kara laugh so hard. It was gorgeous. Her nose scrunched up a bit and I felt the urge to kiss her then and there, but refrained from doing so as our friends were around.

"This will definitely be interesting," Eve sighed, walking close to Ashton but, unlike the rest of us who held hands, they weren't really touching at all. I could sense the attraction between the two of them and it was so sweet.

"Ready for your first Aussie dance?" I grinned down at Kara.

"Ready as I'll ever be," she smiled back. I reached in front of us, pulling open the door and holding it for everyone before entering myself. The music was much louder already and we weren't even at the dance itself yet...

"Let's go then." I threaded my fingers through hers again and together we entered the gymnasium. Passing through the doorway, there was a noticeable difference in the temperature and humidity. It was hot and sticky in here, whereas in the hall it was cool and dry.

We walked over to where they were holding jackets and purses, and the girls all handed the teacher working their clutches. After that, we were about to leave when Kara stopped me.

"Just a second," she said over the pounding music. She then undid her heels and slipped them off, placing them against the wall where countless other pairs of painful-looking footwear sat. Barefoot, she returned to where I stood, the material of her dress flowing around her as she moved. "Ready!"

We made our way over to where the rest of the group stood near the snacks. A wonderful choice of spots, if I say so myself. Kara leaned her head against my shoulder, and I smiled to myself.

"Nice spot you guys have here," I laughed over the music as we reached the others.

"My idea," Michael shouted excitedly through a mouthful of brownie.

"So are we going to dance at this dance or what?" Malaya asked, sounding excitedly impatient.

"I'm not really much of a dancer..." Kara said from beside me. I looked at her curiously, shaking my head.

"Neither am I. But who cares. At least we won't be doing that," I gestured to the crowd on the dance floor. There was more grinding than a gear factory in there!

"I guess. But just for a little while okay?"

"You got it kid," I smiled and led her to dance.

It was spectacular. She twisted and turned, her hair getting in her face, and her dress spinning outward. I let myself go, though I had a feeling I was still being criticized...

We danced for what felt like hours, both slow and fast, pressed against one another and not, when the next thing I knew she was gone.

"Kara?" I called a bit nervously. "Kara! Where are you?!" I couldn't find her anywhere, not through the this mass of bodies around me. I suddenly felt a hand on my shoulder. "Kar-" I spun around to find none other than the devil herself.

Kelsey.

"Oh silly little Lukey," she cooed, her face close to mine so she didn't have to talk so loud. At least that's the reason I used. "I'm not that stupid little American girl," she pouted dramatically.

"Go away Kelsey," I pushed her back slightly, unable to get very far away thanks to the surrounding bodies. She grabbed my wrist tightly, her long nails digging into the flesh there. I winced slightly before wrenching my arm from her grasp. "Screw off!" I yelled.

"But Lukey, I still love you," she said softly in my ear. "I want you, Luke. You don't need that little suicidal bitch when you could have me back."

I froze at her words. She placed her hands on me, pulling on my collar gently, then running her hands down my chest, my stomach, and letting them rest on my waist. I shivered at the touch.

"Take me back Lukey. I want to be like we used to. I love you so much still baby, and I want you back. I want _us_ back..." she breathed, kissing the skin just beneath my ear. Her lips trailed over my jaw, slowly working their way to my own. Her hands rested on the back of my neck now, tugging softly on the hair there. I groaned at how stupid I had been.

This girl knew all my weakness.

"Come back baby," she muttered, her lips faintly brushing mine. I just stood there with my eyes closed, trying to keep my head straight. I had to get away from Kelsey. I had to find Kara. Something might happen to her and I need to get to her first.

"I love you Luke," she whispered before crushing her mouth to mine in a desperate attempt to gain me back. She bit down on my lower lip playfully, slipping her tongue into my mouth. She tasted sweet. Too sweet. Like when you have too much sugar and get sick because of it.

There was a strangled cry from the left of us, and I instantly knew it. I came back to life, shoving Kelsey off of me. She helped in surprise, crashing back into the person behind her, but I didn't care. All I cared about was the small girl fleeing from me. The girl who's hair faded to blue, who's white dress trailed behind her as she ran through the crowd.

All I cared about in that moment was Kara


	26. >Chapter Twenty-Six<

<Kara's POV>

**_[WARNING: May be triggering near the end, so if you have trouble reading that kind of thing, I will do a brief synopsis of this chapter at the end in the notes, so you can just go there. Stay strong. <3]_ **

Tonight was perfect. I lost myself to the pounding beats and bass that rattled bones. The atmosphere was unlike any I'd experienced before. It was feverish and demanding and so fast-paced it left me gasping for air.

I danced and danced, not caring what anyone thought about me. But only for tonight. Tomorrow, I would care again. But not tonight.

Luke was the most perfect person there, looking elegantly rugged with his sleeves unbuttoned and rolled up to the elbows, exposing his tattoos. His hair gradually got messier as the night wore on, mainly because of me. He insisted on kissing me at any chance he got, and often times it would escalate pretty fast.

He would gently press his lips to mine, a hand on the small of my back while the other tilted back my chin. I would wrap my arms around his neck and push my fingers through his silky hair. The next thing I would know, his hand was grazing my leg, his mouth against my neck.

I was completely devoted to this boy. He had me wrapped around his finger, and I wasn't going to leave any time soon. Not if I could help it.

After several hours, the whole feel of the dance shifted. Good music started to play, starting with Green Day's Jesus of Suburbia. Everyone started going nuts and the moshing got ten times worse. One moment I was pressed up against Luke, still intoxicated by the scent of him, and the next there was an unfamiliar set of arms around my waist, a new smell entering my nose. My eyes snapped open, only to find Calum standing there.

Calum, of all people.

I had to admit though, he looked pretty damn good. His hair was swept up into a sort of quiff, a black jacket covering his arms and a white t-shirt. He had on black skinny jeans, just like the rest of the guys in our group, and a small grin adorned his full lips. Of course, he had nothing on Luke, but then again, they were attractive in different ways.

"Do you mind?" He placed his lips near my ear so he wouldn't have to yell.

"Not really. I guess it's cool," I shrugged even though I was slightly uncomfortable. But only because I knew his reputation when it came to girls.

"Good. Luke's been hogging you all night so I just decided I'd take a turn," he said with a smirk in his voice.

"What about Petra?" I pulled back to look at him suspiciously.

"Oh. I told her we were over," he said as if it were the simplest thing in the world. I scoffed, rolling my eyes.

"So why are you dancing with me exactly?" I asked and raised an eyebrow.

"Because you're hot as fúck," he grinned. "What other reason do I need?"

"Well a reason not to is the fact that I'm dating Luke," I yelled, pushing at his chest. But it did nothing to get his arms off my waist. He smirked fully now, a sly and cocky gesture that only infuriated me more. "Let go!" I struggled against him.

"Aw, come on Kara, you don't need Luke. I want you, so isn't that better?" He placed his lips close enough to my ear that they brushed my skin as he growled the words.

"No, that's a thousand times worse," I laughed as I gave a final shove that freed me from him. I hurried away, silently praising my slight stature as I could weave through the crowd much easier than Calum could.

"Luke!" I screamed, crashing through arms and torsos. Tears prickled behind my eyes, but I couldn't let them fall yet. Not here at least. "Luke!!"

I stumbled around aimlessly, feeling my anxiety skyrocket. My breathing got shallow and my palms were coated in ashen of cold sweat. I grew shaky, wanting nothing more than to get out of here. Someone shoved me, sending me crashing backward through a girl and boy caught in the middle of a conversation. That was when my panic attack hit its peak.

Standing no more than a foot away was Luke, my gorgeous Luke who was supposed to love me and said I was the only one. And attached to him like the leech she was: none other than Kelsey. I stood there for probably a full fifteen seconds. But it seemed more like fifteen years as I watched her forcefully kiss him. Everything seemed to slow down, the music sounded like it was playing in a completely different building, the lights seemed to dim. Nothing drew my attention away from the terrible sight before me.

A horrible sound ripped itself out of my lungs, making Luke's head jerk in my direction. He shoved Kelsey off of him, reaching out for me, but I was numb as I turned and fled toward the exit. I shoveled through people, positive that I'd lost him in the crowd. I ran to where my clutch was being held, grabbed my shoes, then left in my bare feet.

I ran home as fast as my legs could carry me, which left them burning when I reached my destination, but the burning was nothing compared to what I felt in my chest. I burst inside, hurtling up the stairs fast enough that mom couldn't stop me. I locked myself in my room, and that's when the tears came.

I collapsed on the floor, clutching my chest as ugly sounds burst from my lips and ugly tears showered down from my eyes. That's what I was. Ugly. Obviously I wasn't good enough for Luke. Otherwise he wouldn't have kissed Kelsey. Otherwise he would have never let Calum steal me away.

With my anxiety in full control, I barely had the ability to make a comprehensible thought, much less stop myself from walking into my bathroom and pulling out a drawer in the sink. Taped underneath was the only thing that could help me now. The only thing that could take my mind off of Luke for the moment.

Changing out of the beautiful dress that I didn't deserve, I sat on the cold floor of the bathroom. Staring at the little glinting sliver of metal between my fingers, I wiped at my soaked face, trying to clear my vision.

one swipe on my hip for Luke.

one stroke on the other hip for Kelsey.

one on the inside of my left thigh for Calum.

one on the inside of my right thigh for myself.

Four lines on my skin could release my anger and fear and anxiety better than anything else could ever hope to. Watching the red running from the slits, I stopped crying. What did four more little scars matter when I already had so many? I needed to anyway.

I dabbed at the blood until it stopped, then looked at the clock to find it was almost two in the morning. I sighed and stood up. Washing all traces of tonight from my face, I gingerly climbed into bed, too tired to sleep, too upset to cry, and to lonely to call Luke, because who knew where I stood with him now?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N
> 
> So, as I said in the beginning, here is a brief synopsis of this chapter: Kara and Luke were dancing, Calum was the one who took her from him (when she disappeared in the last chapter). He says how he dropped his old girlfriend and wanted Kara now, which upsets her so much she pushes him away and runs away through the crowd to look for Luke. She starts to have an anxiety attack because of all the people, and when she finds Luke and Kelsey kissing, she runs home and is self destructive.
> 
> I haven't had anyone talk to me about depression or any kind of mental disorder yet, but please, know that I've been through a lot of that stuff myself, so I want you to talk to me if you need someone to talk to. I promise I won't judge you in any way, I just want to try to help in any way I can. I really love you guys, and I want you to be happy all the time. So know that I'm always available, and if I don't respond right away I will. I swear.


	27. >Chapter Twenty-Seven<

I lay there in bed the next morning, just staring at my blank ceiling. I tried to not think at all, especially not about last night. I was allowed to think of anything except last night. Not that I'd want to try to think as my head was pounding.

The four little cuts stung as I shifted slightly, making me inhale sharply. I might as well get up now...

I did, though with some difficulty. The sheets were tangled around my legs, trying to trap me on the bed. I freed myself and almost tumbled to the ground. Thankfully I caught myself on my desk, atop which lay my phone, with the screen lit up. A phone call was coming through and my phone was on silent.

Luke.

I let it go to voicemail as I stared at the screen numbly. I expected to at least feel sad or angry but I felt nothing. No butterflies like I usually got when he called. No fury over what had happened last night. Just a void inside my chest where my heart used to be. The heart that Luke Hemmings stole them shattered.

A text message popped up, and I saw just how many times he'd tried to reach me. Unlocking my phone, I found over one hundred messages and eighteen missed calls. All from him. I hesitantly opened the messages app and scrolled through.

_Kara?_

_Kara!_

_Please answer Kar..._

_I need to know that you're alright._

_What happened back there..._

_I didn't do that... Kelsey just kinda..._

_I don't even know_

_Please respond Kara._

_I'm not kidding._

_You're going to give me an anxiety attack!_

_Don't do this to me. Please Kar_

The last message he'd sent was longer than the rest.

_Kara, I can see that you are obviously upset and don't want to talk to me right now. And I totally understand that. But please. Just let me have a chance to explain it. Whether that's at school tomorrow or if you want to meet up at the park today... I just need to explain everything. I can't handle this silence Kara. Please. I hope you know that I love you and ONLY you. Forever._

I sighed and began typing a response.

_Luke, I am more upset than I've ever been about anything in my life. I have no idea what the fúck happened last night, but I don't think I want to know. I'm done with all the shit Kelsey has caused me, and if you're just another one of her little puppets now, then I'm done with you too. I can't deal with this right now, okay? I have enough on my fúcking plate right now. I just moved halfway across the world to a country where no one seems to like me, and I have all my personal issues too. So please don't get too upset if I cut you off completely. I just can't do this right now._

My thumb hovered over the send button before I shook my head and closed out of the app. I couldn't send it, no matter how much I wanted to. I needed an explanation, which meant I'd have to talk to him of course, I honestly didn't care.

I checked the voicemails he'd left and they were all asking if I was alright and if I'd gotten home safely and warning me not to do anything stupid. Too late.

I switched my shorts out for a pair of yoga pants. I'd found that these were the most convenient pants when I had cuts because they didn't pull or scratch the little injuries. I then trudged downstairs, making sure to leave my phone on the desk.

Mom sat at the kitchen table reading the Sunday paper and drinking a cup of coffee. What an American thing to do. As I slumped down the stairs, she glanced up and smiled.

"Morning sweetheart," she mused.

"Hey mom," I fake smiled.

"You never told me how it went last night," she cocked her head slightly as I walked over to get a bowl of cereal. "Did you have a good time?"

I hesitated, wondering if I should tell her what happened. If I did, she'd just worry about me when she really needed to focus on her career. If I didn't, she'd think everything was going fine and wonder what happened if, and when, I acted a bit off.

"Yeah. It was great mom. I had a ton of fun," I said softly while looking at my hands as they rested on the countertop. I decided I could make up excuses if she noticed how I was acting. She didn't need anything else to worry about right now, especially not me.

"I'm so glad sweetheart," she sighed. She finally seemed to be settling in with work and everything else, and I didn't want to stress her out over some stupid, beautiful boy who had torn my heart right from my chest.

"I think I'm gonna go draw or something," I said after a long, silent moment. Placing the box of cereal back where it belonged, I kissed mom on the cheek before heading to the stairs. "I love you," I choked out, trying to hold back tears that had started prickling behind my eyes.

"I love you too Kar," she smiled at me before returning to her paper. I ascended the steps, entered my room, and shut the door behind me. Walking over to my hanging chair, I curled up on it, just staring at the opposite wall as it rocked back and forth slowly. Silent tears slid down my cheeks, ignored by hands that were unwilling to dry them. I was broken inside by a boy I'd just met. A boy who stole my heart just to give to someone else. Someone whom I thought he hated.

••••••••••••••••••••

I walked down the street, headphones in and hands shoved into the pockets of my shorts. My eyes were cast downward, only looking at the feet of those approaching so I wouldn't run into anyone. It was almost two o'clock, and I couldn't stand being in my room any longer. So I decided to go for a stroll.

The song playing in my headphones was one I was currently in love with that described my feelings perfectly. It was Bring Me The Horizon's newest single Happy Song, and I had it on repeat as I related to it so much. The lyrics just resonated with me.

_But if I sing along_   
_A little fúcking louder_   
_To a happy song_   
_I'll be alright._

I just needed a song that was loud and meaningful right now, and this was the one that fit perfectly.

As I turned a corner, I collided with someone I hadn't seen approaching. My head jerked up, and before even seeing his face, as it was obviously a man, I knew who it was. Turning on my heel, I tried to get away from him as quickly as possibly, but he caught my wrist before I could get to my car.

I tried to get out of his grip, but Luke was stronger than me. I could see he was talking, trying to calm me down, but I had my volume almost all the way up and couldn't hear a thing he said. He popped my headphones from my ears and I gave him a death glare.

"Kara, please! Calm dow-"

"Let me go!" I yanked at my hand again, and he finally released me. I backed away quickly, refusing to look him in the eye. "What the hell do you want?" I hissed, feeling a lump in my throat.

"Kara, last night wasn't what you think it was-"

"Oh. So you _didn't_ kiss her? You _didn't_ let her climb all over you like the rat she is?" I cut him off again, this time looking up at him furiously. "What am I supposed to think when I see the guy who's supposed to be my _boyfriend_ kissing the girl I thought we both hated?! Hmm? Am I supposed to say, 'Oh he's not cheating on me with that slut. He's just being friendly!' No! You were obviously kissing the girl that pretty much fúcking hospitalized me and you expect me to ju-"

I couldn't finish what I was saying as he trapped me against his chest he was trembling, and so was I. Was it the same reason, or was he scared? I shook from pure rage. But he didn't seem angry. Just scared and worried and sorry. I stood there for a moment, arms at my sides, trying to stay strong in my resolve. Then the tears came and I cracked.

I buried my face in his shoulder, twisting my fingers into the back of his shirt as I cried. Standing there on the sidewalk, I broke down. I broke down and I didn't care who saw.

I just wanted to stop hurting...


	28. >Chapter Twenty-eight<

I sat across from Luke at the Chocolate Koala, staring at the steam rising from the little hole in the lid of my drink. Neither of us talked, just sat there awkwardly. I honestly had no idea of what to say, so I kept my lips pressed together into a line.

"Kara, before you get upset, please let me explain what happened..." Luke whispered after the longest time. I hardly heard him over the din of other costumers and the machines making drinks, but I simply nodded.

"Okay. So we were dancing and all of a sudden you weren't with me. I started looking around for you, yelling your name and trying to find you. I was afraid something happened, though I'm not sure what. Then out of nowhere, Kelsey shows up in front of me." I bristled at the mere mention of her name. "She was going on about how she still loved me and how she'd take me back if I just asked and-"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," I cut him off, looking up at him. "She said she'd take you _back_?! Does that mean you went out at one point?" I felt my chest contract. Had Luke really done things with that...that...monster of a girl?

He let out a long sigh, a look of regret coming over his features. "Yes," he answered slowly. "But I left her because of all the things she did. All the people she terrorized and all the lives she ruined. At one point in my life..." he paused, scrubbing a hand over his face. "I-I was as bad as her..." he muttered, his eyes on the table. "I found excitement and happiness in making other people's lives as miserable as mine. I was so wrong to do that."

"Yes, you were," I agreed, getting his eyes on me once again. "I'm sorry, but I don't really believe that you'd be like _her_ ," I shrugged, making him smile a bit.

"Well then your faith has been misplaced because some people might even say I was worse than her." His smile turned sad and filled with remorse. "I used girls, I beat nerds up..." He had to pause, and I thought I saw tears spring into his gorgeous blue eyes. "I did awful things to myself though, too. I made horrible decisions regarding my own well-being. I tried to convince myself that what I was doing was all okay, but now I see that I really _was_ worse than Kelsey," he whispered.

I was lost for words. If this was all true, I wasn't sure how I felt being around Luke, much less being his _girlfriend_. "Look, we don't have to talk about this here if it's too public," I said quietly after a pause. "Y-you can come over to my house and we can talk there. My mom will be going to work in about an hour, but we can go in my room if you want."

"You said you wanted to see my place didn't you?" He smiled slightly. "Would you like to come over now?"

I thought about the offer for a moment. Did I really want to be alone with Luke after what he just told me? If we were at my house, I could make him leave. But if I went to his flat and got uncomfortable I'd have to be the one to leave and risk humiliation. Was I willing to do that for a boy who, even though I knew quite a bit about, I still didn't really know?

The answer to that question wasn't totally certain, but I decided, possibly against my better judgement, to go.

"That would be nice," I nodded and gave him a small smile.

"Alright then. Should we go now?" He started to stand, and I did as well.

"Yeah. Let's go. We have quite a bit to talk about..."

"Do you want me to drive or just follow me?" We left the café together but not physically close.

I thought for a moment. If he drove it would be easier, but would also probably mean he'd have to drive me back if I wanted to leave to get my own car. "I can ride with you." If I was going to do stupid things, I might as well do it thoroughly.

"Alright. Come on, my car is this way."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

We reached a small flat complex about ten minutes later. The car ride was filled with somewhat uncomfortable silence as music played in the background of his old Jeep. The building looked alright, maybe a little outdated, but I didn't mind. Older meant more character.

We took the elevator up to the eighth floor, where he led me down a hall and stopped at a door. Number 813 to be exact. I figured  the number might come in handy if I ever decided to come over.

He unlocked the door, opening it for both of us. Turning on the light, he let me in. I was pleasantly surprised as I entered. The place was very neat, by male standards. Yes, there was a plate or two in the sink, and yes there was a blanket on the ground and a game controller in the middle of the room, along with a few other things, but it was neat otherwise. It didn't smell either, other than Luke's cologne, which I definitely didn't mind.

He made his way to the couch, sitting off to one side and patting the cushion beside him. I slowly walked over and sat down as well, leaving space between us. The silence was almost unbearable, and I almost felt smothered by it.

"Kara, I've changed. Please know that..." Luke whispered. He sounded broken, as if the tension in the air was choking him. "I grew up. I learned that what I was doing was seriously hurting people, including myself. I just need you to know that..."

I glanced over at him, and this time when I thought I saw tears in his eyes, I knew they were really there. Setting my almost-empty cup on the table in front of us, I lay down, placing my head on his legs. Staring at the wall across the room, I wondered what the hell I was doing. I probably shouldn't have laid in his lap, in fact I definitely shouldn't have. But I couldn't help it. My heart overtook my brain for a split second, and there was no going back.

I heard Luke draw in a quiet breath as I came into contact with him, but after a moment I felt his hand brushing over my hair softly. I closed my eyes, trying to resist the urge to reach up and kiss away all his pain and regret. I stayed where I was, trapped in a battle between my head and my emotions. Logic and reason told me even being here was an awful idea, but my feelings toward Luke were still there, if not stronger than ever.

"I believe you Luke," I promised him. "It's just... I was gone all of a sudden because Calum kind of stole me away and was dancing with me and telling me things-"

"What kind of things?" Luke said quickly, his hand freezing in its motion over my hair.

"Disgusting things. How I didn't need you when I could have him." My voice was small in my ears as I thought over what had happened.

"I could kill him," he hissed through his teeth. His hand resumed its motion, and now his fingers combed through the black and blue strands. He moved it back from my face, his fingertips brushing my cheek. The slight skin-on-skin contact set my nerves ablaze, leaving them craving more. I moved my thumb in small, mindless circles over his leg, just above the knee, deep in thought.

"Please say something Kar..." he pleaded after several minutes of suppressing silence.

"C-can I maybe stay here tonight?" I mumbled, realizing it would be problematic to go home right now. I couldn't deal with mom right now. Not with everything that was going on.

"Of course!" Luke sounded surprised by my request, and I could understand why. I had yelled at him not too long ago, and now I wanted to spend the night with him. Talk about bipolar.

"Thanks. I just can't deal with my mom right now. I have a lot to think about..."

"Yeah, I guess you do," he agreed sadly. Slowly, he leaned down over me and pressed his lips to my temple. The contact was very minimal, but I felt all the emotions he was experiencing through it. Pain, fear, regret, and anger were all there, but one thing was more overpowering.

Love. I could feel his affection through his lips, and it made me want to cry. This boy consumed my thoughts lately, and I honestly hope he never stopped doing that. Because as much as he loved me I would always love him more. But right now we were going through something and I had to keep that in mind.

After another few minutes, we decided to watch tv, settling on some random movie on Netflix. I stayed on his lap, and he kept combing through my hair slowly. There almost seemed to be a silent message between us, communicating how we felt and that hopefully things would get better.

After the third movie, I yawned, moving for practically the first time in more than six hours. Luke stretched his arms over his head and I sat up slowly, my legs aching from being curled up for so long. My hair tumbled down, still brushed back from my face.

"Where's the trash?" I asked and grabbed my coffee cup.

"I'll get it," he smiled and turned off the tv. "We should probably get some sleep though. Don't want your mom to hate me."

"Yeah," I nodded. He took the cup and walked over to the kitchen, tossing it into the garbage. I stood and stretched, then followed Luke as he led me to his room.

"You can sleep on the bed. I'll take the couch," he told me softly. Opening the door, I walked in and felt my head spin. I was really about to stay the night here. Was I really that comfortable with Luke? _Yes,_ I told myself. _He's still your boyfriend. He'd never do anything to you._

In the corner against the wall was his bed, which was unmade but looked very comfortable right now. There was a dresser and several guitars along the opposite wall. The window spanned most of the back wall, letting in what would be sunlight, had it not been almost eleven at night.

"You can sleep in your own bed Luke, it's not a big deal. I slept on a couch the first few days I was here," I insisted, turning toward him. I hadn't expected him to already be changing out of his clothes. His shirt was off and being folded and placed in his dresser. He looked at me with an amused look.

"But you're the guest. Don't you know anything about how the whole 'treat your guests well' thing?" He chuckled.

I sighed and shook my head. "Fine, whatever," I shrugged. I then realized how unprepared I was for this to happen. "Dammit..." I muttered, pulling my hair up into a messy ponytail.

"What?" He had pulled out a pair of flannel pants, turning to look at me again.

"I don't have anything to sleep in," I informed him, slightly embarrassed.

"Well it's a good thing I have a whole dresser full of clothes you can wear right here," he laughed, smiling that dazzling smile he so often did. "Here." He pulled out a second pair of flannel pants and a shirt before handing them to me. "The bathroom is right around the corner."

"Thanks," I smiled and went off to the bathroom. Changing quickly, I gathered my t-shirt and shorts and folded them before heading back to Luke's room. I found him sitting on a stool picking at the strings of his acoustic guitar. I leaned against the wall, watching silently as he hummed along to a song I didn't know.

I shifted my weight and the floor creaked beneath me, catching his attention. He smiled at me before placing the guitar back on its stand and walking over.

"That was really good," I pointed out as he leaned against the door frame. His pajama pants were low on his hips, which were in plain sight as he had no shirt on.

"I'll play the whole thing tomorrow. But for now, you need to sleep," he answered quietly. I nodded, and he kissed my forehead. "Good night Kara. Sweet dreams."

"Night Luke," I replied, smiling a bit as he retreated down the short hall to go sleep on the couch. I padded over to his bed, trying not to trip in the too-long pants that were possibly the most comfortable things I'd ever worn. His shirt hung off my shoulders, which were far narrower than his, but I couldn't have loved it more.

I crawled under the sheets, sinking into the spot where he obviously slept since it dipped down slightly. Everything smelled like him, everything smelled like safety and love and the boy whom I hoped I'd never have to part with. I fell asleep to the sound of my own breath, the scent and feel of him surrounding me fully.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"NO!" I screamed, jolting awake. A sheen of sweat coated my forehead and my heartbeat hammered in my chest. My hands shook as I ran them through my hair. Bringing my knees to my chest, I buried my face in my arms and tried to slow my breathing.

Footsteps sounded outside the room, and there was a knock on the door, making me jump slightly. "Kara?" Luke's voice was rough, as if he's just woken up. _You woke him up idiot,_ I chastised myself. "You alright?"

"Y-yeah..." I replied in a shaky tone. "You can come in," I called. The door opened on slightly squeaky hinges, and I saw Luke's silhouette against the beige walls approaching slowly.

"What happened? I heard you yell," he murmured. I watched as he knelt beside the bed.

"I just had a n-nightmare. That's all. Sorry to wake you," I said, trying to hide the sound of tears from my voice.

"Are you sure you're alright?"

"Yeah, I'm good. Thanks for checking though," I assured him.

"Okay. I love you and I'll be in the other room if you need anything. Goodnight." He sounded tired as he stood again and made for the door. As he went to close it, I stopped him.

"Um, Luke?" He paused in the doorway, his body turned towards where I sat on the bed. "Could you, maybe, uh... Could you stay in here? With me?" I asked just above a whisper.

"Of course," he replied. I could hear the smile in his voice as he returned to the bed. Moving over, I let him crawl in beside me, welcoming the heat that rolled off his skin.

He wrapped his arms around my waist, but left an inch or two between us. It was probably so I didn't feel uncomfortable, and I appreciated that, but all I wanted right now was him. I buried my face in his chest, letting the tears trickle from the corners of my eyes as he just held me, his chin atop my head and his fingers drawing lines on my back.

As my eyes finally drifted shut after a long time, Luke kissed my hair. "I love you," he whispered before fading to black.


	29. >Chapter Twenty-Nine<

A slow thumping was the first thing I heard. It was deep and steady, muted by something. Then I noticed breathing. Easy and soft, I rose with each inhalation and sank down with each exhalation. I then felt hot skin under me. My cheek was pressed against it, and my hand rested on it as well. Then I opened my eyes.

A brilliant beam of sunlight pierced the semi-darkness of the room, admitted by the slight crack in the curtains. I could see a few dust motes dancing through the air on lazy, weak breaths of air that were too small to feel. I blinked a few times, clearing my vision, before looking around a bit.

I was situated on the bed with Luke beneath me. My head lay on his chest and my hand on his stomach. His arm was slung over my hip, and his body was turned slightly towards me. I looked at the way my hair draped over my shoulder, trying to hold onto the last bits of sleep left in me, willing them to lead me back into the darkness I had been entombed in mere moments ago.

But I was awake, and there was no going back to sleep for me. I was too worried about what would happen when Luke woke up. Would he be happy? Upset? Unsure of how he even felt? I sure didn't know how _I_ felt.

Slowly, I peeled myself from his skin and sat up, planning on sneaking out before he woke. My body ached from being curled up beside him, and I stretched my arms over my head. I began untangling myself from the sheets, only to have both of my hands trapped in one of Luke's.

"Don't leave Kara..." His voice was deep and rough with sleep as he mumbled the words, still half asleep. "Please."

I sighed, looking at him curiously. He had never looked more attractive. His hair was deflated and sticking up on one side. His tan skin seemed to glow in the half-light. His tattoos stood out in stark comparison to the rest of him, the dark, bold lines contrasting with the soft atmosphere of the moment. He seemed to be a real-life angel, though maybe a fallen one at that.

I didn't respond, just laid back down in his arms. My fingers absentmindedly drifted over the lines of ink on his skin, following each story, each memory they represented. His lips brushed my hair, sending a gentle shiver down my spine. The too-big shirt I wore had ridden up slightly, and his fingers ghosted over the skin on my hip.

"I love you," I whispered after a long while. His fingers had been gliding in circled over my skin, and they slowed to a stop at my words.

"I love you too Kar. More than you understand. I don't want anything to mess up what we have. As long as you want me I'll be there. And when you stop wanting me there, I'll leave if that's what will make you happy. Please remember that."

My breath hitched in my throat as he spoke. My mind was racing and my mouth had gone dry. Did he really mean that?

"Don't give me a reason to want you to leave and I won't make you. Ever," I promised. Looking up at him, I saw a small smile playing on his lips.

"Alright then. I won't be a stupid teenager and make you leave. I promise," he chuckled. Opening his eyes, he rubbed the sleep from them and looked down at me. I smiled a bit, and he did too before leaning down slightly and kissing my forehead. Laying back down, his fingers resumed their slow movement and I settled my head back on his chest.

We just laid there, watching as the stream of light grew brighter and stronger with the sunrise. We probably just laid there for an hour or two, silently enjoying our fragile peace and happiness while it lasted.

The peace was broken by the buzzing of my phone, which rested atop my clothes. I groaned, not wanting to move. Laughing softly, Luke stood and retrieved the device, leaving me momentarily cold and alone. Returning to the bed, he placed the phone in my hand and sat on the edge of the mattress.

I looked at the screen to find a text from mom. Opening it, I read the words:

_Hi Kar. It's mom. I was just getting a bit worried about you. Just wanted to make sure you were alright and everything. I figure you're probably at a friend's house so just text me when you get this. Love you baby._

I smiled, appreciating her concern. I sent her a quick message back:

_Morning mama. I'm actually at Luke's place but don't worry we didn't even sleep in the same bed. I'll probably be home in a few hours. Not sure though. Love you and I'll see you at home. <3_

Locking it, I sat up and looked at Luke, feeling a bit guilty about the slight lie. But I was partly true. We did start off in separate rooms.

"That was my mom wondering where I was. I said I was here but nothing bad happened," I explained when Luke looked at me questioningly.

"Ah, I see," he said a bit dramatically. A sudden smile appeared on his lips, making my heart flutter. "You know what sounds really good right now?"

"What?" I couldn't help but smile as well as I leaned my head on his shoulder.

"Waffle sticks. I have some frozen ones that are really good. We should make them," he suggested happily.

"That sounds like a wonderful idea," I giggled at his enthusiasm. "I don't think I've ever had waffle sticks."

"Well you're having them today! Let's go!" He took my hand in his and pulled me up from the bed. I stumbled a bit and he froze, looking at me with concern. "Sorry if that was a little rough," he apologized quickly.

"Why are you apologizing? My foot just got caught in the sheets. Happens all the time," I laughed. "Don't worry about it. You did nothing."

"Oh, alrighty then. Let's go make waffle sticks!" With that he marched to the kitchen to make breakfast, and I followed close behind.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"These are so good," I said through a mouthful of food.

"Told ya," he grinned, putting another forkful in his mouth.

"I never would've expected frozen food to be this good. Back in America a lot of frozen food kinda sucks," I laughed. Taking a sip of milk, I got a sense of nostalgia. "You know, I used to sit at the kitchen table every Saturday morning and eat waffles and milk with my mom?" I said softly.

"No, I didn't that. But I'm glad you could experience that again. Sort of," he grinned.

I nodded, looking at my plate. "Yeah. Thank you again Luke. For last night and this and just...for being you." My voice was quiet and a bit hesitant. "I'm sorry I reacted the way I did at the dance. I just kinda jumped to concl-"

"It's fine Kara," he cut me off as I put my head in my hands, knotting my fingers in my hair. He lifted my chin slowly, and tears pricked behind my eyes. "I'm sorry it happened in the first place," he assured me with a small smile.

"Please don't try to take the blame for how I reacted, Luke. I could've just talked to you. I didn't have to be so mad at you. I didn't have to lock myself in my room and take a razo-" I caught myself before telling him what I did to myself. But not quick enough.

His eyes widened slightly and he was silent as his gaze flickered to my arms then back to my face. I couldn't keep eye contact and just stared at the surface of the table. I followed the grain of the wood round and round, trying to contain my tears. My fingernails dug lightly into my scalp as I sat there regretting the words that had accidentally escaped my mouth.

"Y-you _what_?" Luke's voice was unlike anything I'd ever heard. It barely came out in a whisper, more a slight disturbance in the air than words. I'd never heard someone sound so...so broken and upset than when he said those two words.

"Nothing Luke. It doesn't matter," I muttered, then stood and took my mostly empty plate to the sink. I placed it under the faucet and turned on the water. My back was to Luke and I let the tears that were already blurring my vision slip silently down my face as I scrubbed at the plate.

I wasn't really sure what happened, but one moment I was standing there washing off the dish, and the next I was up on the counter. My face was buried in Luke's shoulder as he stood between my legs, and his arms were locked around me. Salty tears slid down his bare chest, tears that had leaked from my own eyes, and he just stood there, holding me.

He kissed my neck, my ear, my temple, and everything in between. He murmured that everything would be alright and that he was sorry and that I'd get better, but I knew deep down that I probably wouldn't get better. I'd been doing so well, but I still went back to my razors and pain. I couldn't see how this could ever get better.

"Kara, please look at me," he whispered after the longest time. He stepped back slightly, causing me to do as he asked. "Please don't cry," he pleaded, running his thumbs over my tear-stained cheeks. "How about I play that song on guitar for you? The one you heard last night?" He gave me a reassuring smile and I nodded. "Come on then," he said and helped me to the floor.

We made our way to his room once again, where he sat down on the stool by the wall and retrieved the acoustic guitar from its stand. "I wrote this song, and if I were to ever be in a band, I'd probably force them to learn it," he laughed softly as he tuned the strings quickly. "I've never loved a song more in my life."

"What's it called?" I asked as I plopped down on the floor in front of him. I wiped at my face, drying the rest of the tears there.

"I'm not really sure honestly," he shrugged.

"I'll see if I can help then," I smiled. "Go whenever."

"Okay then, here goes," he smiled. Taking a deep breath, he placed his fingers on the strings and began.

_I need your love_   
_To light up this house_   
_I wanna know_   
_What you're all about,_   
_I wanna feel you, feel you tonight_   
_I wanna tell you that it's alright_

_I need your love_   
_To guide me back home_   
_When I'm with you_   
_I'm never alone_   
_I need to feel you, feel you tonight_   
_I need to tell you that it's alright_

_We'll never be_   
_As young as we are now_   
_It's time to leave_   
_This old back and white town_   
_Let's cease the day,_   
_Let's run away,_   
_Don't let the colors fade to grey_   
_We'll never be_   
_As young as we are now,_   
_As young as we are now._

He continued on, strumming as he went. The lyrics could only have been written from experience, describing exactly how he must have felt while writing them. I sat there, mesmerized by his voice as it flowed from his lips. I'd never heard him sing before, and I wished I'd heard it before now.

As the final note rang out, I realized I'd been staring at him the entire time. My lips were parted slightly, and my eyes were wider than normal. He looked at me and grinned.

"So I take it you liked the song?" He laughed softly and replaced the guitar on the stand. He then moved from the stool to sit beside me, his knees pulled up to his chest and his arms linked around them.

"Yeah. I really liked it. I didn't know you could sing so well," I admitted, blushing a bit.

"Well thanks, that means a lot coming from you," he smiled and nudged me playfully with his shoulder.

"You're welcome," I laughed and bumped my own shoulder against his arm in return.

There was a short silence as we just sat there on the floor together. "If you don't want to talk about what happened, that's up to you," he looked at me again. "Just know that I'll be here when you're comfortable enough to let it out. Alright?"

I looked intently at my hands as I nodded. "Yeah. Thanks for understanding Luke," I smiled and put my head on his shoulder.

"Always Kar," he said with a smile in his voice as he pulled me closer. "Always..."


	30. >Chapter Thirty<

Around noon, I walked through the front door of my house. Mom sat on the recliner in the living room reading some book or another. When she heard the door swing open, her head turned to face me.

"Hi sweetheart," she smiled.

"Hey mom. I'm sorry I didn't tell you where I went. I didn't expect that to happen. I'll make sure I text you next time," I apologized and walked over to her. "I had a good night though," I promised as I bent down to hug her.

"That's great. Luke's parents were home I assume?" As awesome as my mom was most of the time, sometimes she was a bit too protective...

I wasn't sure if I should tell her that Luke had his own place. She got uncomfortable when I was at a friend's house and their parents weren't home. I really didn't new her telling me I couldn't go back there, but I also hated lying to her.

"Um, don't freak out.... But he has his own flat just outside the city," I said hesitantly.

She was quiet for a moment, before he let out a deep sigh. Slowly taking off her reading glasses, she looked at her hands. "Kara," she started. Her tone of voice somewhat worried me. "You know how I feel about your friends parents not being home-"

"I know. But like I said. We didn't even sleep in the same room. Nothing happened, I swear," I interjected quickly.

She looked up at me. "But, as I was going to say, I think you're old enough to be responsible and make good decisions." I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding. "I trust you not to be stupid, so don't make me regret it, okay?"

"Yeah. Got it mom," I nodded with a small smile.

"Good. Now go do whatever. I want some peace and quiet. I finally got a Monday off for once," she said and laid back int the chair, closing her eyes.

"Wait. Today's Monday?!" I looked at the lock screen of my phone, and sure enough it said today was Monday.

"Yeah. Why?" She looked at me curiously.

"Do I not have _school_ today?" I raised an eyebrow.

"I don't know. I figured since you stayed at Luke's last night you guys didn't have school today," she shrugged. "If you do though I can always call you in sick."

"Halfway through the day?"

"You're my kid. I can call you in when I want," she laughed.

"Thanks mom. That's why I love you," I kissed her on the cheek and bounded up the stairs to my room. The tune of Luke's song was caught in my head, playing over and over as I grabbed a change of clothes and went to take a shower.

I stood under the hot water and thought back to last night. That made me remember the nightmare I'd had before I woke up. The memory made my stomach tighten and a shiver run through my whole body despite the temperature of the water.

_The room was hot and sweaty, with hardly enough space and air to breath. I was pressed against Luke, guided in my movements by the crowd around us. The heavy music was so loud it physically hurt me, but I couldn't care less._

_His hands wondered over my sides, up and down my arms, tangling themselves in my hair, which hung damp in my face. I kept mine clasped behind his neck, feeling our bodies move against each other._

_No words were exchanged between us. None were needed. A silent communication passed from one to the other, and I could practically feel his skin buzzing with elation._

_Then suddenly he wasn't there. I saw him moving through the crowd away from me, almost seeming to be dragged along by someone or other. I hurried after him, making sure I didn't lose him in the suffocating mass of bodies._

_I burst out of the giant mosh pit and stopped dead in my tracks. There against the wall was Luke and another girl whom I couldn't make out in the dim light. He had her pinned to the brick, his hands gripping onto the material of her dress. Her nails dug into his back as she kissed him forcefully._

_However, the longer I stood there, the clearer it became that she wasn't the one kissing him, but rather he was kissing_ her _, practically swallowing the girl whole. She didn't seem to mind one bit though, just welcomed him right in._

_After a few agonizing moments, they parted. Luke turned to face me with a cold grin and shifted slightly. That's when I saw who the girl was: Kelsey. He had been kissing Kelsey._

_Tears welled in my eyes as I looked between the two. Unable to handle what was going on, I made a break for the door. Bursting outside I found myself in on a side street, enveloped in the comforting feeling of fresh, cool night air. I gasped for breath, wiping at my eyes as I left the club._

_"Where do you think you're going bítch? Who ever said I was done with you?" A hand clamped down on my wrist, holding on so tight it hurt. I whirled around to find none other than Luke._

_"What the hell are you talking about?!" I cried out, yanking at my hand._

_"I said I'm not done with you yet, you little cùnt. Do you even speak English?" He sneered, pulling me toward him._

_I struggled against his grip but he was too strong. "Why are you acting like this Luke? It's not funny!" I yelled._

_"Is everything okay out here babe?" A sickly sweet voice was coming toward us and I instantly recognized it as Kelsey._

_"Why is she calling you babe, Luke?" I asked, thoroughly confused._

_"Why does it matter to you? She's my girlfriend. She can call me whatever the hell she wants," he scoffed. Turning to Kelsey, he grinned. "What should we do K?"_

_"I think she should be in the dirt where she belongs," she smile maliciously at me._

_"I totally agree," he chuckled. With that, he flung me against the wall. I crashed against the brick, my head cracking agains the hard surface. Unable to stand, or breathe for that matter, I fell hard to the ground. My head sp_ _un_ _and my lungs felt like they'd exploded. I tasted metal in my mouth and the back of my head stung to high heaven._

_"Anything else love?" Kelsey sounded far away as I tried to concentrate on the pebble in front of my face, trying to stay still to lessen the pain a bit._

_"Anything you'd like," he replied sweetly._

_"How about her anorexic little tummy. What about a nice li_ _ttle_ kick _-start. Maybe she'll eat then!" She giggled as if it were the funniest thing she'd heard._

_"Please stop!" I croaked._

_"Begging for mercy already?" Luke knelt down beside me with a look of fake pity. "How pathetic," he spat._

_Suddenly a foot made contact with my lower abdomen. If I thought I couldn't breath before, I was wrong. I instantly curled into a ball, not that it would do much to help the pain. My eyes were going all fuzzy and I could see little black dots here and there._

_"More? Or should we leave her here?" Now their voices were far away_ and _muffled._

_"She's not worth our time. Let's get outta here and go have some real fun," she giggled again._

_I heard their footsteps retreating and weakly called out. "No... No! Please! No!"_

I shook the dream from my mind. The water was getting too hot, and I turned around to turn it off. Climbing out, I found the mirror was completely fogged up. Wiping at a small part of it, I just stared at my reflection for a moment, unsatisfied with my features. As usual.

Getting dressed, I just tried to remind myself that Luke had changed. He would never do that to me, and he wouldn't go back to Kelsey.

Or would he?


	31. >Chapter Thirty-One<

I picked up my phone, flopping down on my bed. I pulled up my contacts and sent a message to Malaya and Eve.

_Hey guys. Um can we meet up somewhere after school? Or can you maybe come over my house? I need to talk. Thanks! Xo_

It took a few minutes before I got a response from both of them.

_From: Malaya_

_Of course girl! If you wanna stay at home I'm down for coming over._

_From: Eve_

_Sure. I could come over too if you want._

I smiled, sending a reply:

_Thanks. You can come over. Whenever is fine, but sooner would be better._

I stood up again, walking out into the hall. "Mom! Malaya and Eve are coming over after school. Is that alright?" I called down to her.

"Sure sweetie. I'll be leaving in about an hour and a half for a late lunch with a colleague of mine, but I think they're responsible girls," she replied.

"Thanks mama!" I retreated back into my room to sit a draw until they came. The product was a sketch of a girl with wild hair, pulled together in a complex braid. Hanging from her hair were feathers and two dream catchers to scare away her nightmares. It was quite beautiful, really. I heard the doorbell go off about three hours later and I hurried downstairs and opened the door, finding both girls just beyond the threshold.

"Hey guys! Come on in," I stepped aside and greeted them. Once inside, I shut the door and smiled again. "Want anything to eat?" I gestured to the kitchen.

"Is that even a question?" Malaya laughed.

"I'll have something small. I'm going to dinner tonight with a friend," Eve replied, blushing slightly.

"And who, may I ask, is this friend?" I giggled and nudged her with my elbow. It had only been a little while, yet I felt like I didn't need to be shy with any of the people in our friend group anymore. Well except maybe Calum, but he wasn't really a full part of the group.

"Just a friend. He graduated already," she shrugged, her cheeks darkening as her smile broadened.

Malaya and I looked at one another in excitement as a mutual discovery passed between us. "Are you going to dinner with Ashton?!" She jumped up and hugged Eve enthusiastically. "Oh my gosh Eve!! That's so cuuuuuute!!!"

We all started laughing at Malaya's response. "It's just to Macca's or something like that. Nothing fancy in the slightest," Eve tried to settle our perhaps overly-excited friend.

"Still. Are you considering it a _date_?" She wiggled her eyebrows playfully and Eve rolled her eyes, her smile still plastered to her face.

"I don't know. Maybe..." She shrugged and looked at her feet. "We just had a great time at the dance and decided to have another go at it."

"I'm so happy for you," I grinned happily. At least the others had fun even though I...didn't, for a lack of better words...

"Thanks. Now I think Malaya needs food already. She couldn't stop saying how hungry school made her on our way over here," Eve laughed.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"So... You slept together, but didn't... _sleep together_?" Malaya asked, clarifying the story.

"Yeah. Because of the nightmare. I yelled and he rushed in. But before he left I asked if he'd stay, and after that, I slept the best I had in months," I shrugged.

"That's too cute," Eve sighed from her spot on the rug. "You two are perfect together honestly."

"I guess..." I shrugged and picked at the fabric of the hanging chair I was perched on. I hadn't shared what Luke confided in me. They still didn't know what he had done in the past, though they were aware already that he and Kelsey used to go out. I wasn't sure if it was my place to tell them.

"You are! The quiet, shy artist getting the rough and tough bad boy of the school! It's like one of those cheesy romance novels!" Malaya flipped over onto her stomach from where she was sprawled out on my bed and grinned at me. "It won't be long until you guys will be at his place doing more than just sleeping in the same bed," she winked jokingly.

We all burst into laughter, but I had a feeling she might be on the right track. How long would it be now until I was going to his flat every day after school? Isn't that what happens in those sap stories she mentioned? The girl falls head over heels for a boy that leads her on for a while, breaks her heart, then somehow mends it? I hoped that wasn't how we would be...

But at the same time that was almost exactly what I wanted. I didn't mind if I got my heart broken. Right now, Luke made me feel like I actually might belong somewhere, with someone. And that someone was him. As far as I could tell, he wanted to make sure nothing bad happened to me, and that I was happy, and I'd never had anyone (other than mom, but she didn't count) want to do that for me. And to be completely honest, it felt amazing.

"I just hope there's a happy ending to this all..." I smiled hesitantly. I hoped by saying that I wasn't tainting the chances that it would all end well. Because that really was what I wanted.

"I'm sure it will. You two are like two puzzle pieces, meant to be together!" Malaya assured me.

"Besides, in the long run, what's the worst that could happen?" Eve shrugged. "He's a boy, after all. And boys tend to screw up. But if you care about him enough, and he cares about you enough, then you'll be alright."

Her words were true and with good intention, but these two had no idea how many things could go wrong...


	32. >Chapter Thirty-Two<

It turns out that after Monday, I'd end up going to Luke's flat every day after school for the rest of the week. School, the awful place that I endured for the better part of my day, was a mere obstacle I had to get through in my wait to go to Luke's place.

Don't get me wrong though. I love talking to all my friends and even Calum, though it's quite awkward still. But I obviously enjoy being with Luke a bit more.

After I had stayed the night, I decided to put the whole dance situation behind us, as did he. I apologized for reacting the way I did, he apologized for...his contribution to the event... After that, we hadn't talked about it too much, and I was thankful for that. I didn't really need a reminder yet.

It was finally Friday, and I made my way to the cafeteria for lunch, Malaya walking beside me.

"I just can't wait for them to come. If they perform Truce I think I might die," she said, going full-on fangirl. She had been telling me about how her mom had bought her tickets for the Twenty One Pilots show in two months.

"I just can't believe how close your seats a-" I began before a peal of obnoxious laughter interrupted me from behind.

I took a deep breath, closing my eyes as Malaya placed a hand on my arm. "Ignore them Kara," she murmured reassuringly. We turned the corner to enter the cafeteria, and I quickly looked behind us to find exactly what I hoped wouldn't be there.

Kelsey.

We hurried over to get in line, and as soon as I saw her little herd sit down at their table, Kelsey with her back to the lunch line, I let go of the breath I'd been holding. Malaya gave me a sympathetic look, wrapping an arm around my shoulders. "It's alright Kar. If you don't give her the power to hurt you, she won't be able to."

"That's the thing. I don't know how to take that power away from her," I sighed, looking around for Luke and Michael. I found that Michael was ahead of us in line, but I couldn't locate Luke. It shouldn't have been that hard, considering his height...

I had just reached the front of the line when I found him sitting at our usual table. I wasn't sure why, but a feeling of slight relief spread through me when I saw that he was there. Maybe it was because of Kelsey...

I got a salad and a water bottle before punching in my student ID to buy the food. I waited a moment or two for Malaya, then we both made our way to the lunch table.

The only way to get there, though, was to pass by Kelsey's table.

Sure there were other ways, but the other paths were congested with ravenous high schoolers sitting at lunch tables that weren't all that far apart. The aisles were a death trap of chair legs and human legs that we'd never get through.

Keeping my eyes on the floor, I hurried past _her_ table, praying nothing would happen. I made it almost to safety, to Luke, when I was doomed.

"Oh, hi Kara," came that sneering voice from behind me. My pace faltered as I clenched my jaw, willing myself to stay quiet. I finally reached the table and quickly sat in the seat beside Luke. He was glaring at Kelsey as he placed an arm around my shoulders, pulling me into his chest.

"Aw, come on Lukey. Don't give me that look," she laughed. "You seriously stayed with that little pity case? How sweet. You've changed, I see," she taunted further.

"Just shut those slùtty lips of yours Kelsey. I don't want to hear it," he said forcefully over his shoulder, his hand coming to lace with mine. "Just ignore her Kara. She's just a bìtch," he assured me softly. I nodded and opened my salad.

"But Lukey, don't you think she wants to hear about all the fun stories we have together?" I felt Luke tense around me, his muscles bristling at the mention of what he had done in the past.

"How we used to show people like her what the inside of a locker felt like and gave them silly little nicknames?" Kelsey's whole group giggled at that one, and I realized how much the noise level had dropped in the large room. People were obviously paying attention to this, which I didn't want.

"The best was the time we convinced that girl, oh, what was her name again?" From where I sat I could still hear the mocking sarcasm dripping from her words. "Tess was it? Anyway, remember that time when we convinced whatever her name was that she wasn't worth the space she took up? Remember how she was found dead in those woods? Hanging from that tall tree, just dangling there with a note in her pocket? I remember reading it. She said it was partly because of me, but mostly because of y-"

"Enough!" Luke shot up from his seat as he said the single word forcefully enough to send vibrations through my entire being. "I said shut up, so you'd be better off keeping your mouth closed. Unless you want something _really_ bad to happen to it," he threatened in a furious, growling tone. From the way his voice sounded, I knew he had made his way to Kelsey's table.

"Don't try me Lukey. I can still end you," she scoffed.

"See if I give a solitary fúck. Spoiler alert: I won't." His voice was dark and terrifying, only making me wonder how much scarier it would have been to see his face as well.

With  a final growl, he stalked back to where I sat frozen and unresponsive. All I could think about was the image created by Kelsey's words. I could just see that poor girl dangling from a tree branch, her eyes bloodshot, face a splotchy purple color, the signs of struggle clearly displayed within the claw marks and cuts from the rope that dug into her ski-

"Kara!" Luke's voice was filled with concern as he snapped me back to reality. I took a shaky breath and glanced at him. He gave a relieved sigh before pulling me against his chest. His one arm was situated around my shoulders while the other cradled my head, his fingers brushing back the loose strands of hair from my face.

I hadn't realized I was crying until the material of his shirt was wet beneath my skin. I cried into his chest, not caring who saw, especially not Kelsey. The bell rang loudly, making everyone rise from their seats. Except us.

"What do you have for the rest of the day?" He whispered the question, his lips brushing over my temple.

I wiped at my tears, trying to stop crying as the cafeteria emptied. "Art, History, and Maths," I mumbled, my voice thick. "Why?"

"We're leaving early," he stated simply. I started to protest when he tipped my head back to look at him. "You won't be able to do anything in class anyway, not judging by the way you're acting right now. You can come to my place like you do every day. We won't have to tell your mum if you think she'd get angry. But you're not staying here. Got it?"

I nodded slightly, making him smile and kiss my forehead softly. "Good. Let's go then," he murmured before standing.


	33. >Chapter Thirty-Three<

I sat in the passenger's seat of Luke's car, my head against the window and my hand propped under my chin. Music played softly from the speakers, and from what I could tell it was some Good Charlotte song. Usually Luke would be jamming out to any song by them, headbangs and all, but he simply sat there, white-knuckled and silent as he drove toward his complex. 

"Kara, are you alright?" Luke asked as he pulled into the parking lot. Finding an open spot, he parked the car and looked at me.

I shrugged, not sure how to respond. I wasn't alright, but I didn't know how to say what I felt. My mind kept going back to what Kelsey had said about that poor girl, and it sent shivers down my spine to think he could have been capable of doing something like that.

"Let's just go inside," I mumbled and unbuckled my seat belt. I went to open the door, but it was still locked. Looking at Luke, I found him just siting there, glaring at his hands. "Luke..." I placed a hand on his arm, causing him to shift his gaze.

"Yeah..." He slowly pulled the keys from the ignition and unlocked the doors. We got out, he relocked the car, and we went up to his flat. Once inside, I went over to sit on the couch after slipping off my shoes. He went to the kitchen to get food, or so I assumed.

He stood facing away from me, his hands gripping the counter and his back and shoulders visibly tense through his tight shirt. His head was bowed and I thought I saw his shoulders shaking.

"Kara," Luke said after a very long silence. The tone of his voice was unlike anything I'd ever heard. There was pure, raw emotion in it, and I can tell you one thing. It wasn't happiness. It was anger and humiliation and shame and sadness.

"Luke?" I asked in a small voice, worry twisting inside me.

"I'm not safe for you," he forced out. "I've done-" A sob choked him, making me flinch slightly. "I've done _horrible_ things, Kara. And you don't seem to understand that... I'm not trying to push you away, b-but you need to understand that..." Luke sunk to a low crouch, resting his head on the edge of the counter, atop which his arms rested.

"Don't you get that I don't care about what you did in the past?" I didn't know what to say. I hadn't expected this to happen. I wasn't sure what I should do, because he hadn't fallen apart in front of me before.

"You just don't understand!" The volume of his voice scared me a bit as his hands balled into fists. "No matter what I do, I can't get rid of those things I've done! I'm just going to end up hurting you, and I can't tell you enough." He stood again, running his hands through his hair. "I'm not healthy for you, but I can't stay away from you. You're like one of the cigarettes I used to smoke all too often. I know it's just a relationship that's bound to end in flames and pain, but I'm addicted."

I was frozen, not even daring to breath in the midst of this outbreak. He spun around to face me, and I instinctively gave a slight gasp. Tears glistened on his cheeks, leaking from his slightly bloodshot eyes. Eyes that contained storms worse than any hurricane, eyes that, once captivating, now held pain and regret and fear. His jaw clenched and unclenched, his bottom lip trembling slightly as he watched me with those stormy eyes.

"Luke, please calm down..." I whispered, moving to stand up. But he seemed to flinch away, as if my rising from the couch would physically hurt him. I tried to understand why he was doing what he was doing, but I couldn't.

"Please don't do this Luke," I shook my head slightly. "I know you might have done bad things before, but I don't think you're willing to go back to that person. I don't think you want that. So I don't care about all those things. Don't you get that?"

"Why would you want to stay with someone like me though?" If I thought he'd sounded broken before, I was mistaken. This was the voice, the trembling, quiet voice of a boy who was so shattered, all that remained were grains of sand. Sand that, once upon a time, had been one beautiful piece of glass, a sculpture perhaps, that over time withered and crumbled to dust.

"You don't know anything Kara. You don't know what I've done," he shook his head. "The things I've told you about are nothing compared to others. You really don't get what a horrible person I am." Luke let out a sob, knotting his fingers in his hair and squeezing his eyes shut.

" _I_ am the reason Tess hung herself. _I_ am the one who told her she'd never be worth anything, the one who burned her so many times with the dying embers of countless cigarettes. I'm the one l shoved her to the ground, into lockers, the one who bruised and battered her...." He covered is face with his forearms, pulling at his hair. He was leaned against the counter as he rocked back and forth slightly. "And you know what she did to me?!" He yelled the words, making me jump. Tears flooded my vision as he took a labored breath.

"She did absolutely nothing Kara! That girl never would have hurt a fly! She _never_ fought back, she never told anyone about what we were doing to her! She just took it all in silence, then one day it was all too much so she decided to go jump from a tree branch and die!"

At this, Luke slid down to the floor, laid his forehead on his knees and cried. He cried and cried as I crept over. I sat beside him, doing what little I could to try and ease his pain. I knew it wouldn't make much of a difference, but I'd rather tell myself I tried to lessen his suffering than say I did nothing at all. I wrapped my arms around him, resting my head on his shoulder as he cried.

I wasn't sure when or how, but after a long time we found ourselves curled up on the couch as golden light streamed through the window. Luke had calmed down to some degree, but his breathing was still labored. I was settled beneath him as his head rested under my chin, his hand splayed out on my stomach as I held him. I ran my fingers gently through his hair, trying to soothe him.

"I'll be right back," he croaked finally, then stood on somewhat shaky legs and retreated to get something from his room. When he returned, I found the last things I'd expected in his hand.

A single cigarette and a small black lighter.

"If you want you can stay in here, but I just... I need to calm down or I might do something I'll end up regretting..." The sadness in his voice was almost too much for me to handle as I shook my head.

"I don't want you to be alone right now..." I murmured and stood. Walking to the door, I slipped on my shoes and turned to face him with a small smile. "You don't deserve that."

He chuckled darkly. "Believe me Kara. I don't deserve you in the slightest. Didn't we just go over that?" There was a bit of ruefulness in his voice as he pulled on his shoes and opened the door.

Shaking my head slightly, I walked out of the room, closely followed by the sound of the door closing and Luke's footsteps. We made our way down to the ground level, then out a door leading to a courtyard that I hadn't seen yet.

He led me over to a bench, where he sat and pulled out the lighter. Silently, he placed the cigarette between his lips, ignited a small yellow flame, then lit the end of the cigarette carefully. Letting the flame go out, he took a long drag before he brought two fingers to his mouth to remove the little roll of chemicals from his lips. Leaning back, he closed his eyes and exhaled through his nose, his breath clouded with smoke.

As much as I hated smoking, and trust me, I had reason to despise it, I had to admit that this boy made it look like an art.

After a few more draws, practically all the tension that had permeated his muscles before was gone. He lounged on the bench, eyes shut, as I stood slightly off to the side, trying not to gag from the pungent smoke.

Finally, once half the cigarette was gone, he opened his eyes. His pupils were dilated, though they quickly narrowed as they were exposed to the fading sun. He glanced over at where I stood rigid against the wall, a small smile playing on his lips.

Luke sat up, rolling the half smoked cigarette between his thumb and index finger as he leaned forward, elbows on his knees. "I'm sorry about earlier Kara..." He murmured, his eyes caught on the small object in his grip. "I'm sorry if I scared you."

Sighing, I went against my instinct and slowly sat beside him on the bench. I wasn't sure how to feel about the scent of smoke and his cologne, but it definitely wasn't _bad_... It almost seemed like just his cologne itself was missing something before and the smell of cigarette smoke was the final puzzle piece.

"You're right though. According to what you've told me, you _have_ done some awful things. And I can't deny that," I started, swallowing hard. "But you also need to know that what I said was true as well. I am willing to look past all of those things because I'm honestly in love with you. I love everything about you, Luke. And that includes your flaws and your past and your future. And you need to realize that."

Hoping that he wouldn't get upset, I slowly eased the remains of the cigarette from his grasp. He watched as I rolled it between my fingers, contemplating whether or not I should do what I was about to do.

"My aunt was a smoker you know," I said softly. "She had been smoking for almost thirty years when she developed lung cancer. They tried everything to save her. But in the end, nothing worked and she died. That was my Christmas gift. A phone call that my aunt and possibly closest friend was dead. You know what that means?" I looked up at Luke, who's gaze was fixated on my eyes already.

"No," he whispered, shaking his head slowly.

"That means I detest smoking. I hate it because it killed possibly my best friend. But you know what? I don't care that you smoke. In fact, if it helps you and you're willing to risk your health, I won't stop you. And you know why? Because I love you. I love you so much that I just want you to be happy. If smoking does that for you, so be it."

He was silent, watching as I, in the heat of the moment, made a split-second decision. Disregarding everything I'd ever told myself about smoking, I slowly raised the cigarette to my mouth with a trembling hand, pausing to look Luke straight in the eye before I closed my lips around the end and took a breath in.

Smoke filled my lungs and mouth, making me almost choke. Almost. After the initial panic I felt in my chest, I told myself to just relax. Once I did it wasn't so bad. I wouldn't do it again, but it wasn't so bad.

I coughed as I exhaled the smoke, trying to get it all out. Luke chuckled beside me as he retrieved the cigarette from my fingers. Once I stopped coughing I looked at him with a small smile.

"Why did you do that if you're so against smoking?" He wore an expression of curiosity and amusement.

"To prove how much I love you," I shrugged. "Also, because I wanted to see what I was missing out on, I guess..." I gave a shy smile and looked down at my lap.

"Could've gone worse, especially considering that was your first time," he laughed.


	34. >Chapter Thirty-Four<

I had gotten an idea for what my room should be as Luke and I sat there in the courtyard talking yesterday. We'd stayed out there until it was too dark, then we had gone inside for about two hours to do what homework we had before I had to go home.

It was the next day after school and I'd asked if we could go to my house today so I could start on my room. I now sat cross-legged on my desk, a brush in my hand and a pallet beside me. Luke was on my bed, a hand splayed out on his chest as he watched me intently.

I painted designs onto the blank, white wall. I wanted to decorate them with one-of-a-kind hand done artwork so it would mean something. I had gotten an idea and immediately looked for a good spot on the semi-covered walls.

"That's beautiful Kara..." he said after a long silence. His voice was soft, but the silence amplified it. I turned to smile at him quickly, before returning to the planet I was painting.

"Thanks Luke," I replied, reaching down for more paint. There was rustling behind me, and then Luke's hands here on my stomach, his chest pressed to my back, his head leaned on my shoulder.

"I have an idea..." he mumbled into my hair, kissing the back of my neck gently.

"And what's that?" I smiled to myself.

"Well right now you'd consider the wall your canvas, right?" His voice grew slightly mischievous, and I nodded.

"Yeah, I guess."

"So turn me into your canvas..." he breathed in my ear. The feeling sent shivers down my spine, and I didn't know what to say.

I finished the planet I was on, then cleaned my brushes and turned to Luke. "I'd love to," I nodded with a smile.

He grinned, taking my hands and helping me off the desk. "Where should I paint?" I examined his cluttered skin.

"I have a spot," he smiled and pulled his shirt over his head in one fluid motion. No matter how many times I saw him like this, I still got a little breathless. "Across my shoulders, see?" He turned around to show me his broad, empty shoulders. No ink was present there, just empty, pure skin.

"How did I not think of your back?" I chuckled, more to myself than anything.

"I'm not sure," he laughed and glanced back at me. "Do you think that'll work though?"

I ran my fingers down the unmarked expanse of his skin and nodded. "It's perfect. What should I paint though?"

"Something meaningful. Something that you would want tattooed, should you ever get one or not," he suggested.

I looked at the wall, at my half-done artwork, and smiled. "Sit on the bed. I know what to do," I instructed.

As he settled back on my bed, I grabbed my paints and a fine-tipped brush and turned back to Luke. He was sitting cross legged on the sheets, looking at his arms.

"I'm sorry if this tickles," I warned as I got paint on my brush. "Here goes," I muttered to myself as I set the brush to his skin.

Lines and colors bloomed on his back, coalescing into an image. He hardly batted an eye as the bristles glided over his skin, leaving cool paint in their wakes. Usually this would tickle, but he seemed completely unaffected by it.

After about two hours, I stepped away and admired my work. The solar system was stretched across his back, the sun situated on his left shoulder, with the rest of the planets in their respective order. I'd left out Pluto as I hadn't made enough room for it, but otherwise it was fairly accurate.

I paused for a moment, and everything was completely silent as I looked over the art of his body for the umpteenth time. The ridge of his spine, the lines of hard muscle, the wings of his shoulder blades, the way his neck corded when it was bent down like that. This boy didn't need any paint or ink to be a work of art.

"Done," I announced softly. He sighed, straightening up a bit.

"How's it look?" Luke glanced back at me with a smile.

"Like something I'd get tattooed," I grinned. Leaning down and being extra careful with the semi-wet paint, I kissed his neck sweetly. "Should I take a picture so you can see it?" I suggested.

"Why not," he nodded. "I'm sure it's beautiful anyway though," he added as I retrieved my small camera from its place on my desk. Returning to where I'd been standing previously, I turned it on and waited until the screen showed the art on his skin. Shifting the focus, I snapped a photo of my work and smiled.

Handing him the camera, I kissed his cheek. "Take a look, Mr. Canvas Man," I giggled. He smiled and took the camera from me. After a long moment of silence as he took in what I'd done to him, his gaze was shifted onto me. There were practically stars in his eyes as he smiled.

"How are you so good?" Luke chuckled softly. I shrugged and felt my cheeks turn pink. "Kara, this is beautiful..." he whispered, looking back at the picture.

"Thanks Luke," I replied softly. "The paint isn't the real art in this picture though..." I said almost inaudibly. It was more of a thought that I hadn't meant to say aloud.

And as much as I prayed that Luke hadn't heard me, he looked back at me, laughter in his eyes as he smiled. Turning so he faced me fully, he circled his arms around my waist and tugged me down to perch on his lap. I blushed as I remembered that he had no shirt on, but that didn't stop me from resting my head against his hot, inked chest.

"That, my love, is where you are wrong," Luke whispered and kissed my hair. We sat there for a long time, just two very vulnerable, very broken people that fixed one another and made each other strong.

Eventually Luke shifted beneath me. "Do you think this paint is dry yet?" he asked quietly.

I nodded. "Definitely. How come?" I removed my head from his chest to look at him curiously.

"Because I need to go do something now. And you need to come with me to do it," he stated as if it were obvious. "And I should probably wear a shirt in public, though some people might not mind," he grinned.

"I wouldn't," I shrugged with a smile. Reaching behind him, I handed Luke his shirt a bit reluctantly. "So where are we going then?"

"That's a surprise," he smiled and carefully pulled his shirt on. "Now get shoes on. We need to go before they close for the night."


	35. >Chapter Thirty-Five<

<Luke's POV>

It was so difficult to sit there while she painted on my back. It wasn't that I was uncomfortable, because I honestly could've sat there for hours with her. But the paintbrush was so insanely ticklish! Not only that, but the paint felt like ice against my skin. I thought I'd get used to the feeling after a while, but that didn't happen.

When Kara was finally finished and sitting in my lap, my mind was running crazy. For the last few days, I'd been thinking about how much she meant to me. I wanted a permanent reminder of that, for when I wasn't with her and even if, God forbid, something were to happen to our relationship. I don't ever want to forget what she's done for me, because whether she knows it or not, she has done so much.

The way I wanted to do that was to get another tattoo. One that somehow related to her. I'd been thinking of something simple, like finding out what her favorite flower was and getting it over my heart, or something cheesy like that.

But now I had something meaningful from her. Something that no one else could've done, no one else could have created.

I had her art.

And now I wanted to make it permanent.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Luke, seriously," Kara sighed from the passenger's seat of my car. "Where are we going?"

I glanced over at her, smiling as I saw she was already looking at me. "I told you Kar, it's a surprise!" I laughed at her impatience and returned my eyes to the road. "Don't worry. We're almost there."

"Alright. Can I at least know if I'll like where we're going?"

"Depends," I shrugged. I stopped at a red light, spotting our destination to the left. "But you're about to find out," I smiled as the light turned green. "Because we have reached our destination." I pulled into a small parking lot and found a spot before looking at her.

She stared out the window at the LED sign in the window, her mouth slightly agape. I grinned as she turned her gaze to me.

"Why are we here Luke?" Her voice was soft in the space between us.

I thought about how I should tell her what I wanted to do. "I want to make you permanent..." I almost whispered after a long moment.

She was silent as she tried to figure out what I meant. The moment she did, realization dawned on her face as her eyes widened slightly.

"Come on," I smiled and opened my door. She just sat there for a moment before she got out as well. I walked around the car and took her hand in mine, kissing her head.

"Are you sure you want to do this Luke?" Kara sounded unsure as we walked up to the door. "I mean, what if something happens...between us?"

"Don't worry about that. If anything were to happen to what we have, which I don't plan on, I never want to forget what you've done for me. This way you'll be a part of me, even if you aren't there." I placed my hands on either side of her face and leaned my forehead against hers. "And now I have something perfect to do that."

"If you really want this, I guess I can deal," she nodded and smiled a bit.

"Good. Because I would've done it anyway," I grinned and placed a small kiss on her lips before pulling open the door and letting her in before I entered as well.

The familiar buzz of tattoos being etched into skin and the smell of ink and antiseptic greeted me like an old friend. The dimly lit walls were plastered with tattoo ideas, and several people sat in reclined chairs, most of them with expressions of immense pain on their faces.

A greeting was called out from the far end of the parlor, drawing my attention to the person who spoke.

Diana, a close friend of mine, sat beside a young, very tattooed woman. Her bright orange and blue hair was pulled back into a messy bun, exposing her sharp features. Green eyes crinkled at the corners as she smiled toward me, and she beckoned us over. I recaptured Kara's hand in mine, leading her to where Diana was situated.

"Her name is Diana, and she's done every tattoo I've ever gotten. She's the only person I'd ever trust to do something like this because, as you can see," I gestured to all my ink. "She knows what she's doing. And she does it very well." Kara nodded, her eyes wandering all over the walls.

"There's my best customer!" Diana laughed as we reached her. "Let me just finish up here then I'll help you, sound good?"

"Of course," I nodded and grinned. "We're gonna go sit down 'til you finish," I gestured to the sitting area up front. She nodded and returned to the ink she was working on. Kara and I went and situated ourselves on one of the three couches in the front of the parlor. I wrapped an arm around her shoulders, pulling her against me. Her head rested against my collarbone, her arms linked around my middle.

"You're positive you want what I painted on you forever," she asked again.

"A hundred percent sure. I love you so much. It's like yesterday when you decided to take a drag," I chuckled, as did she.

"Yeah, well that won't be on my skin for the rest of my life," she retorted.

"Same idea," I shrugged. "This is how I'm proving I'm all yours and you're all mine." I kissed her head again, inhaling the scent I knew so well.

We sat there for a bit longer before Diana and her previous client made their way to the front to check out. Once the woman thanked her and left, Kara and I stood and strode over to the desk.

"Alright then. What can I do for you today Luke?" Diana smiled and placed her elbows on the counter, leaning on them. "And may I ask who this cutie is who decided to tag along?" She smiled at Kara.

"This is my girlfriend, Kara. And I'm actually here today to get a tattoo of something she painted," I explained with a smile.

"Well it's nice to meet you Kara. I'm Diana, though Luke might have already told you," she chuckled and put out her hand.

"Nice to meet you too," Kara responded softly and shook the hand offered to her. "He told me about how you've done all of his tattoos. I must say, I'm kind of in love with your skill."

"Well thank you sweetheart, but I'm just another tattoo artist," Diana waved the compliment off.

"Seriously. They're beautiful. You have a very close attention to detail."

"Hence why I came back to you for this tattoo," I added.

"Well let's see what you want, shall we?" Diana straightened again and walked around the counter, leading us to the back of the parlor again. "Where are we talking about inking this time?"

"My back," I said simply.

"Finally!" She threw her hands in the air dramatically. "Kara, you must mean a ton to this boy. He refuses to get tattoos on his back. I've been waiting for the day I get to take a needle to it," she laughed, coming to a stop at her station.

"She does mean a ton," I agreed, looking down at Kara with a smile.

"Ya know what? I think we should do this in the back room. That'll be more comfortable," Diana said before beckoning us along. She opened a door I'd been through a few times for larger tattoos and I had to admit. It was more comfortable back here.

"So what kind of tattoo are we talking? A cross? A bird?" she asked as she prepared everything she'd need.

"It's painted on right now if you want to see," I said honestly after a moment.

She stopped cleaning a needle with rubbing alcohol for a moment, looking up at me with surprise. "Really? I'd love to see it."

I nodded and released my hold on Kara's hand to remove my shirt carefully. I felt the paint crackle slightly, hoping it didn't get too messed up. Turning around, I showed her.

A small gasp came from Diana as she looked at the planets displayed on my skin. "You painted this Kara?" She asked in wonder that I could relate to completely and raised her pierced eyebrows.

"Yeah. It could be better though," Kara shrugged modestly.

"Well I'll try to do it some justice," Diana chuckled. "You're very talented sweetheart. Maybe you should be the tattoo artist here instead of me."

I stepped over to where Diana was. "How much do you think something this big will be?" I asked her quietly.

"Not sure. We'll see when it's done, alright kiddo?" She smiled.

"Sure," I nodded.

"Now do you have a picture of this since I'll obviously have to take the paint off to clean your skin?" She asked as she finished preparing the ink and needles.

"Yeah. Kara has one on her camera," I nodded, glad that I'd told her to take it with us. She retrieved the photo and handed the camera to Diana.

"Alright then. Go on and sit down and we can get started," she instructed. I nodded and settled on the chair made for back tattoos. I'd never had to use it. Until now. Nervousness set in then, something I usually felt right about now. But this time is wasn't really for me.

I felt more nervous for Kara than myself. I was now beginning to regret bringing her along, simply because she'd have to see me in a very pained, vulnerable state. I would say that after all my tattoos that I was immune to the pain, but that was a lie. It still hurt like hell, I just knew what to expect now.

"You ready bud?" Diana inquired from behind me. I heard her pull up her chair and equipment, along with the familiar sound of a rubbing alcohol pad being opened.

"Yup," I nodded and looked at Kara, who had sat down in a chair before me. I smiled, and she decided to move the chair closer so she could hold my hand. I wasn't sure I'd need it, but it might have just been her. She's very empathetic after all. Besides, it was still comforting.

"Alrighty then. Let's begin," Diana said and used the frigid wipe to remove the paint of the sun from my left shoulder. "Should this one be in color?"

"Of course. You can outline it in black if you think that will look better though," I nodded, keeping my eyes on Kara. She kept a smile on her face as she sat there quietly.

"Okay. You know the drill by now. It'll hurt, as you're probably aware. Watch out there Kara. He might cry a little," she joked before turning on the large metallic tool in her hand. The loud buzzing was all too familiar to me.

The next thing I knew, my skin was on fire and ink spread slowly and painfully over my back. I tried not to black out from the feeling, though I might have slipping out of consciousness once or twice. I'd never gotten such a large and detailed tattoo at one time, much less one with color. It was probably the most painful thing I'd ever been through in my life.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Alright Luke, you're all done," Diana said after four hours. Her voice sounded slightly detached and far away. "You did great buddy." She gently placed bandages over the raw skin of my back and helped me sit up.

"How's it look?" I asked, my mind foggy from the pain. It tingled through my body, not only contained to the area of origin.

"Luke, it looks amazing..." Kara whispered, placing her hands on my cheeks. "You were so brave," she added and pressed a gentle kiss to my forehead, which was covered in a sheen of sweat.

I nodded, closing my eyes. Diana had begun putting everything away, so it was essentially just Kara and I. "I'm glad it looks good. It hurt like a motherfúcker," I let out a shaky laugh.

She smiled and rested her forehead against mine. "I still can't believe you did that for me Luke. You looked like you would pass out any second honestly," she said softly.

"Well believe it. And I think I actually did pass out once or twice," I nodded. "How much Diana?" I called back to her.

She was silent for a moment before responding. "It's on the house Luke."

"What are you talking about?" I asked incredulously and turned slightly (and very slowly) to look at her. "I have to pay you for that. It too like four hours!"

"Yes. Four hours I had with no other obligations. You're my best customer Luke. You always insist on paying me full price for everything, even when I offer you a discount. Plus this one is special to you. I know how much a significant other can mean to a person. So I refuse to accept any money you will try to give me, got it?"

I sighed, shaking my head and smiling slightly. "Fine you stubborn woman. Am I set to go then?"

"Yup. You know the way to take care of it, I'm sure. Once you feel like you can stand you're free to go," she nodded.

"Thank you. More than I can say. How many days should I give this one to heal?" I asked, slowly easing myself off the chair. My legs were stuff from sitting for so long and by back burned, but otherwise my head was clearing by the second.

"I'd say five to seven days. You'll need to wear the bandages to school if you go. No exceptions. I'll not have four hours of hard work getting infected," she answered sternly.

"Got it. Thank you again," I said and finally stood all the way. I swayed on my feet  a bit, but almost immediately Kara was there, her arm slung low on my waist. She was very careful of my shoulders, and I was grateful for the support.

"You're very welcome Luke. Take care," Diana answered before Kara and I made our way to the car. She decided to drive to my apartment, as I had difficulty even sitting in the car. As it was, I had to lean against the dash board.

When we reached my apartment and we were inside, Kara helped me onto my bed. I had to lay on my stomach as my back obviously wasn't an option. She'd also helped me get my shirt off as it was difficult for me to raise my arms above my head.

She sat beside me on the bed, brushing my hair away from my face as I tried to stay awake. "Do you want me to stay the night tonight?" she asked quietly.

I would've shrugged had it not been so painful. "If you want to, it would be nice. But if your mom wants you home that's fine too," I mumbled.

"I'll stay tonight. In case you wake up in the middle of the night and need something. I wouldn't want you to be alone if something happens," she explained. I nodded and watched as she stood and walked to my dresser. "Can I borrow some pants to sleep in again?" Her cheeks flushed that delicate pink I loved seeing as I nodded again.

"Second drawer from the top," I mumbled, my eyes fluttering shut with exhaustion. "You can sleep on the bed if you want, too," I added. There was plenty of space, even with me on my stomach.

"Alright. I'll be right back," she nodded before she made her way to the bathroom. A minute or two later she returned with her blue and black hair in a very messy but attractive bun and a pair of my flannel pants hanging loosely onto her hips. She had taken off her t-shirt, now in just a sports bra and the pajama pants.

I raised my eyebrows at her attire, making her blush yet again. "It's hot in here," she muttered, making her way to my bed.

"I'm not complaining. Believe me," I chuckled. She climbed in beside me, running her fingers over my lower back slowly until I was practically asleep.

"I love you so much Kara," I whispered, hardly aware of anything anymore.

"I know," she replied with a kiss to my temple before I drifted into the depths of sleep. 


	36. >Chapter Thirty-Six<

<Kara's POV>

It was awful.

Watching the pain play out on Luke's face for a solid four hours was a terrible experience. I kept expecting him to cry out due to the obvious agony he was in, but the most that left his mouth were shaky breaths and quiet grunts.

The way he clung to my hand was heartbreaking. His eyes were screwed shut the entire time, sweat beading on his forehead. I wanted to wrap my arms around him and kiss the pain away, but I obviously couldn't do that, and it practically caused me physical pain.

Now, waking up next to him on Saturday morning, I didn't move so as not to wake him up. He needed sleep right now to get better, so that's what he would have. I didn't even mind the fact that I couldn't leave the bed due to his arm, which was slung over my stomach.

Last night had been a bit rough. He'd accidentally rolled onto his side or back a few times, and the result was him jolting awake with a gasp of pain. I had been sleeping lightly all night in case anything happened, but it still surprised me every time.

As I looked at him carefully, sleep still laced through his body, I noticed how peaceful he was. Yes, there was ink covering his body, and a metal ring in his lip. Yes, there was hard, lean muscle beneath his skin and he would still be intimidating to some people.

But it was when he was asleep that I could really appreciate the details this boy held.

The laughter lines near his mouth. The shallow crease between his eyebrows as his eyes ran back and forth beneath his eyelids as he navigated through some unknown dream world. The way he took long, slow breaths that made the muscles in his back shift slightly each time. He looked so at peace, as if the pressure and stress of wakefulness wouldn't dare touch him.

I shifted slightly beneath his arm, and in his slumber he moved it off my stomach. Not what I was going for but I guess now I could move mostly freely as I turned so my body faced Luke. I very lightly traced the lines of ink on his bicep, careful not to go too high on his arm in case it would hurt him. The motion would have been enough to mesmerize me back to sleep had it not caused an increase in his breathing.

I paused what I was doing, praying he would go back to sleep, but he did no such thing. Instead he let out a soft groan and rubbed at his eyes.

"Try to go back to sleep Luke," I whispered as he opened his eyes. He smiled at me and scrunched his nose at my request.

"Why would I do that when there's a pretty girl in my bed?" His sweet smile became a cheeky grin as I rolled my eyes.

"I'm going to choose to ignore that comment," I sighed. "How's your back feeling?"

"Like shít. No, I take that back. Like flaming shít. That's what it feels like," he replied with another groan. "It wasn't too bad though...until you mentioned it."

"Well sorry I'm a worried girlfriend who's boyfriend was stupid enough to get a huge tattoo across his shoulders!"

"Well sorry I'm the stupid boyfriend who wanted to show his worried girlfriend how much she means to him!" He replied in mock anger.

I rolled my eyes and started to get out of bed when the bed shifted and Luke's  arm caught me around the stomach, pulling me back down. I fell back, my head bouncing against the pillow as his appeared overhead.

"Where are you going so fast?" He raised an eyebrow and smiled quizzically down at me.

"To make breakfast?" It came out more as a question than a statement as butterflies started to form in my stomach.

"You're staying right here with me."

"Luke, I'm starving. Plus I have morning breath," I crossed my arms over my chest as he brushed a piece of hair behind my ear. So much for that messy bun I guess.

"Kara, remember that I'm a boy. Boys don't care about bad smells." Now it was his turn to roll his eyes as he brought his lips down gently upon mine.

"Luke, remember I'm a girl. Girls _do_ care about bad smells," I mimicked him when he pulled away. With a grin, I ducked under his arm and scrambled off the bed. He sighed as he saw me standing already. "Do you have any mouthwash?" I smiled sweetly.

He sat up all the way now and nodded. "I have an extra toothbrush and toothpaste in the left-hand drawer if you want. It could be yours for when you stay the night since when you do it's usually never planned," he laughed.

"Sure. Be right back," I smiled once more before turning and making my way to his bathroom. Sure enough, I found a toothbrush and toothpaste in the drawer, which I proceeded to use. As I went to spit out the minty stuff, I felt a leg brush mine and sure enough Luke had crept in silently.

"Figured I might as well get up too," he said when I looked at him in the mirror. I could tell how hard it was for him to not shrug when saying it.

"Didn't Diana want you to change the bandages when you woke up?" I asked, suddenly remembering her instructions.

"I don't really remember, but it sounds logical. Can you help?" Luke looked at me helplessly and I smiled.

"Of course I will. Like she said, don't want four hours of work getting infected right? So what do I do?"

"First you have to take these ones off. Just peel off the tape around the edges," he explained, turning away from me so I could easily access his back in the narrow space.

I reached up grasping the corner of one of the four pieces of tape. Tugging on it, I peeled it down and off before placing it on the counter and starting on the next. I went slowly and carefully in case it hurt, but Luke didn't say a thing until I told him it was all off.

"Now just take the gauze off. But slowly please. It always hurts the first time," he warned. I nodded and began. The first strip made him tense up slightly. The bottom piece wasn't as bad. But the middle section, which covered most of the tattoo, made him inhale sharply as it left his skin. I gasped too.

Even though his back was red and the places where there was ink were slightly raised and swollen, my work was displayed practically the same as when I'd painted it. The lines were crisp and neat, and the colors Diana had used were almost the exact shades I'd used as well. She had captured everything I tried to capture, only her work was permanent.

"What? Does it look like something's wrong?" There was a touch of panic in his voice.

I hesitated, unsure of how to describe what I was feeling. "N-not at all. Luke..." Tears sprung to my eyes. Tears I'd held back last night because I'd wanted to stay strong for him. But now they rushed forth like a dam had burst inside me. "I just can't believe you'd do something like this for me..." I whispered.

"Well of course I would Kara. Haven't you realized by now that you've changed me? You've made me a better person? Now whenever I look at this I'll think of you. And if anything were to happen to us, I'd never do anything to get rid of or change this. Because I'd never want to forget you," he turned around again, leaning down slightly as he took my face in his hands. "This is how much I love you," he smiled and kissed my forehead, brushing away the tears that slipped from my eyes with his thumbs.

"But I saw how much pain you were in Luke. If what you're saying is true, _I_ caused that pain. You got the tattoo because of me, so therefore you wouldn't have been in that much pain if it weren't for me," I mumbled, looking down.

"And every second was worth it. Every time I thought I'd pass out from the pain I peeked over at you. Not once did I see you crying and that reminded me to be strong. You're my heroine, but you're also my rehab. Does that make sense?" He ghosted the pad of his thumb over my bottom lip slowly, catching a tear that had fallen that far.

"Kinda," I nodded.

He sighed. "What I mean by that is you're my biggest weakness. I'd give up anything for you. I'd give up _music_ for you. But you also make me so much stronger than I ever could be alone. I mean really, I just got this tattoo because of you, right?" He smiled and kissed my nose. "Now does it make sense?"

I nodded again, sniffing. "Good. Now I think I'm gonna keep the gauze off for a bit because this actually feels a bit better than it did before," he chuckled and kissed my lips finally. I kissed him back for a moment before we both pulled back.

" _Now_ can I get breakfast?" I raised an eyebrow.


	37. >Chapter Thirty-Seven<

Waffle sticks yet again.

They're now my favorite food here in Australia. He'd also introduced me to the best variation today too. You put some whipped cream on them, along with chocolate syrup and strawberry slices and it's the best thing ever. Plus whenever I have them I'm with Luke so that makes them even more special....

We sat on the couch eating our waffle sticks and watching reruns of Teen Titans since there was a throwback marathon going on. And to be honest, I think this was one of my favorite moments I'd had with Luke so far.

I was surprised at how comfortable I was with him already. I mean, we'd only known each other for a few months and I was already walking around his flat in nothing but his pajama pants and a sports bra.... But I didn't feel weird and it was nice.

"How's your back?" I asked as our laughter died down.

"Still hurts but I think it's healing faster than anticipated," he nodded with a heart-warming grin.

"Must be the waffle sticks," I giggled. "I can't believe we went through a whole box already!"

"Well when I'm in the equation food doesn't last too long," he pointed out.

"Very true," I nodded.

Our attention was recaptured as the show came back on, opening on a very romantically awkward scene involving Starfire and Robin.

"I say she should just kiss him already," Luke sighed. "She's totally whipped."

I laughed at his last comment before agreeing. "Yeah really. It's not that hard." With that, I found an opportunity. Grinning, I turned Luke's head so he was looking at me before I pressed my lips to his. "See? I mean how difficult would it be?" I laughed after pulling back.

Luke chuckled beside me, shaking his head. "Sly move, Kara. Ten points to Hufflepuff."

"Hey! If anything I'm a Ravenclaw! And I'd say that was worth more than ten points," I retorted in a mockingly upset voice.

"Fine. Do it again and you automatically win whatever those points go to," he laughed. Shrugging, I did just that. Kissing him again, a smile on my lips, I placed my fingers under his chin, noticing the slight stubble there.

"The House Cup this year goes to Ravenclaw then," he whispered, his lips brushing against mine as we pulled back slightly.

"Sly move though, Luke. Ten points to Hufflepuff," I winked as I moved back further. He rolled his eyes and picked up his plate. I did the same, and we walked over to the sink together to rinse off our dishes. We then went back to the couch,  where Luke sat with with his legs up and his lower back against the arm rest. He pulled me down to sit between them, and I rolled my eyes at the huge grin on his face.

"Is this a problem?" He asked smugly as I laid against his chest.

"Not at all," I murmured and closed my eyes. I felt his hands brush back the hair in my face, before he slowly pulled out the hair tie holding it up. I looked up at him in amusement as a faint blush appeared on his cheeks.

"I like playing with your hair," he explained. Another moment where I could tell he wanted to shrug but couldn't because of his shoulders.

"Go for it," I chuckled and shifted so he could have full access to it.

I could tell he was smiling as his fingers combed through it. Sometimes it's funny how something like playing with another person's hair can make someone happy. I felt him section off my hair, my curiosity growing as to what he was doing.

After several minutes, he stopped whatever he was doing, and leaned in close to my ear. "Do you have that hair tie?" He whispered. I nodded with a laugh and handed it to him. He put it in then placed my hair over my shoulder. I looked down to find a braid.

Luke Hemmings just braided my hair.

And like a pro, may I add....

I paused before looking back at him in disbelief. "How is it possible that my boyfriend can braid hair better than I can?" I raised an eyebrow and looked back at what he'd done.

He would have shrugged again and smiled. "I just made two sections and took little pieces from each side and crossed them over," he replied, as if it were the simplest idea known to man.

"Wow. And you just decided to do that out of nowhere?" I laughed.

"I guess so," he nodded.

"You intrigue me Luke Hemmings." I smiled and shook my head before leaning against him again. I had almost fallen asleep when a familiar tone played in Luke's room. I recognized it as my mom's ringtone on my phone and immediately jumped off the couch, practically sprinting to pick up the phone.

Frantically answering, I was met with a very motherly, upset tone. "Kara Haylee Jennings, where have you been?!" Mom sounded very upset with me.

"Oh my gosh mom! I'm so, so sorry!" I sighed, mentally facepalming so hard. "I forgot to call! I stayed over at Luke's house last night after he-" I cut myself off before telling her about the tattoo. "He took me out and then wasn't feeling well, so I stayed over to make sure he was alright," I told her, mostly speaking the truth.

"I've been trying to text you all morning though," she retorted with exasperation.

"I'm so sorry. My phone was in the other room and I had it on vibrate. I'm really sorry mom," I groaned. I saw Luke enter slowly in my peripheral vision.

"Well I need you here in a bit soon, so please come home eventually," she replied after a long silence.

"Alright mom. I'm sorry again. Love you."

"Love you too sweetie. See you later." There was a faint click and the call ended. With it came a huge sigh from me and that oh-so familiar pair of tattooed arms wrapped around my shoulders.

"I'm sorry if I got you in trouble," Luke whispered in my ear.

"I'm fine. She was just worried because I usually call her when I stay the night and I forgot to last night. I didn't get in trouble though," I shook my head and let him pull me against his chest again. It felt nice in his arms, safe, like nothing could ever hurt me there.

"I'm still sorry."

"Don't be. I need a little drama in my life," I chuckled and closed my eyes. "It's good for me."

"But not too much drama. Because it not good for you, which isn't good for me."

"Good point." I smiled to myself at the luck I had stumbled upon since coming to Australia.


	38. >Chapter Thirty-Eight<

The rest of the week passed by without a hitch for the most part. I helped Luke with his shoulders, and when it was finally time for him to take the bandages off for good I couldn't have been happier with the results. Diana had done better than I could've imagined.

It was now Saturday around noon and the whole gang was piled into Michael's car. It was just big enough to fit all seven of us. That number was made of Malaya, Eve, and myself, along with Luke, Michael, Calum, and Ashton. Apparently on Wednesday night Ash asked Eve on a date, to which she obviously said yes.

It was still a bit odd to think that he had saved my life...

"Here we are," Luke announced from beside me. The others started unbuckling their seat belts as Mikey parked the car. 

"What are you talking about?" I asked with confusion. There was nothing but trees out here. Trees and old concrete.

"You'll see," he just grinned. Getting out of the car, I walked around to take his hand in my own, leaning lightly against his arm. "Come on."

Once everyone was out, we started into the woods. The trees were pretty far apart, dappling the ground with late afternoon light. What I would give to take a picture or draw this moment right now.

"Almost there," Luke whispered and twined his fingers through mine. He kissed my hair, making me smile.

Then I saw where we were going. An old metal rod stood in the cracked cement. It looked like it used to be a sign, but the only thing remaining was the post. Behind it, there was a rectangular hole in the concrete, and I could see steps descending into the inky black below. Was it a tunnel?

"Time to to get the full Sydney teenager experience, Kara," Ashton said from behind me. I turned to roll my eyes at him, making Eve grin.

"He's right though," Michael mused and smiled at me. Malaya nodded, and I just smiled at how cute everyone looked. Mikey had his arm wrapped around Malaya's shoulders, and she had hers wrapped around his waist. Ash had Eve on his back, her arms clasped around his neck loosely and her feet clasped in front of him. I knew that she probably wasn't all that heavy, but judging by Ashton's arms it wouldn't have been a problem either way.

The only one who was alone was Calum. I felt a pang as I saw him watching the ground, a few paces behind the others as he carried a large bag, the contents of which I still didn't know. For once he wasn't making snide comments, and I felt for him. Once upon a time, I was that person, the awkward single one in a group of people who were dating. Like a seventh wheel.

"Careful on the stairs," Luke warned a we came to the old stone steps. They dipped in the center from who knows how many years of use. I just prayed they weren't slippery.

"So what's the story behind this place?" I asked quietly as Michael pulled out a flashlight. Turning it on, the powerful beam sliced through the shadows, illuminating our decent.

"Fifty-some years ago, this used to be a town. Everything around us wasn't there," Mikey began excitedly. "Now, this town was a pretty big train stop. It gathered a lot of business from the railroads, so when the subway was developed they thought it was a great idea, so they started one of the first underground railways in all of Australia."

"These townspeople though," Eve continued as Michael paused. Our progress down the stairs was fairly slow as they were pretty narrow and steep. "They still lived in mainly wooden houses. So one day, this is where the story gets unclear, a house caught on fire. Then the next house, and the next. Pretty soon, all that was left were the stone parts of buildings and ashes."

"So the town just burned to the ground?" It came out more as a statement than a question.

"Yeah," Luke replied. "But the subway system still remained. Which is what brings us here." From his voice I could tell he was smiling.

"There's a tradition we have here." Ashton spoke up from behind me. "And the tradition is that any student in their last two years of schooling should come down and spray paint something on the wall of the subway."

"The stairs end so be careful," Luke warned suddenly. Sure enough, after three more steps there were none left. I looked back the way we came and found the surface was far above.

"So we're gonna spray paint in the dark?" I asked, looking around. Even with the powerful flashlight, we were still surrounded by darkness that was practically tangible.

"Oh no," Malaya laughed. "Some bloke came down here a few years ago and did everyone a huge favor."

"And what was that?" I asked in utter confusion. She simply walked to the nearest wall and, with some help from the flashlight Michael held, found a small contraption.

"Whomever it was put some generators down here, and did this..." She plugged something into an outlet and suddenly light burst into existence. There were twinkle lights strung along the walls, illuminating the tracks. Every so often there was another generator that powered another string of lights. It was beautiful really, since some strings were simple white lights, and others were the multi-colored ones.

"Woah..." I breathed, feeling Luke's hand slide into mine. I leaned my head on his arm, as I stared at the walls and lights. Then the wall on the other side of the tracks caught my attention. _This_ was what they were talking about. _This_ was the kind of art I could look at for the rest of my life.

Names crowded the surface, letters in every color imaginable, all in different handwriting. Some were small and neat, others were big and messy, while still others were done like true graffiti, in large, blocky letters. In addition to the names, there was also artwork. Several people had made their mark by painting intricate designs, simple masterpieces, as well as quite a few crude, immature pieces, considering these were still teenagers who did all this.

The sight was pretty breathtaking.

"Isn't it amazing?" Luke mumbled into my hair, kissing my head softly.

"I don't even know what to say about it," I whispered as the others began to make their way to the left along the tracks. The path on the right was in light and intimidating looking, so we followed the glowing lights to the end of the paint.

"What do you think you'll paint?" He wrapped his arm around my shoulder as I now looked at an empty slab of concrete wall.

"I want to make a piece of art. I don't want to just have my name. That's too boring," I muttered.

"Sounds like a good idea. You should do something special. Something that'll mean a lot."

"Like a planet..." I whispered.

Luke chuckled beside me. "As long as I won't have to get it tattooed again, go for it,"he replied sarcastically, making me laugh. "Cal. You got the paint?" He called, his voice bouncing off the stone surrounding us.

The dark-haired boy nodded and set down the bag he'd been carrying. "Sure do!" He crouched down and pulled the zipper open, revealing probably thirty different spray paint cans, all in different colors. "Pick your color Kara," he offered and stood back up.

Making my way over, I smiled a bit and nodded. "Thanks," I said quietly and retrieved a black can as well as two rush Browns, tan, white, and a light brown. Returning to my spot, I popped the cap off the black and shook it very well.

"I've never spray painted before," I smiled at Luke.

"Just think of it as drawing but you can't touch the paper," he advised as he picked out a deep blue paint.

I nodded and slowly began. I made an outline of the planet fairly quickly, including the rings circling it. Soon it was time for the color. It ended up looking like a cross between Jupiter and Saturn, and I was eventually satisfied with the result. By the time I'd finished, I was immune to the smell of the spray paint and everyone else had taken to watching me, as they were all finished.

I added a signature beneath one of the rings and replaced the now much lighter cans in the bag before turning to the others. They all stared in awe at the piece on the wall, and I felt a surge of pride. That was _my_ artwork on the wall, _my_ talent and skill. They stood there gaping at something _I_ had created, and it felt nice.

Once they'd all snapped out of whatever spell they'd been put under, I accepted the compliments they all gave me, and I was thankful for the fairly dim lights as I was probably bright red.

"How about we go adventuring in the tunnels a bit?" Michael grinned and pointed the flashlight into the tunnel a ways.

"I don't know Mikey," Ashton hesitated. "I've done that before and it wasn't really the best idea ever..."

"Well what happened?" The colorful headed boy asked.

"Let's just say it's darker than you expect and you might end up with a broken leg..." Ashton chuckled.

"You broke your leg?" I asked in surprise.

"No! Not me," he laughed. "My friend did. His foot slipped as he was walking along and fell into the tracks. Ended up dislocating his leg, shattered his shin, and since we're underground I had to go back up top to get service to call an ambulance. Which meant I had to leave him down there alone. It was pretty terrifying."

"I vote we _don't_ go adventuring then..." Calum spoke up as he zipped up the bag of paints.

"Yeeeaaahhh....... Probably for the best," Michael agreed.

"So what now?" I raised my eyebrows and looked around.

"Now, we go out to eat!" Malaya laughed and threw her hands in the air. "Food, here we come!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"I don't think I could eat another bite if you paid me a million dollars...." Michael groaned.

"Well, for a million dollars I could," Malaya chuckled. "But any less is a no deal."

If grinned and leaned back against the back of the booth. We sat in a retro-themed diner that I'd never seen as it was on the way to the subway. We decided it would be a good place to eat on the way home.

"I think those were some of the best fries I've ever had, if I'm being honest," Eve sighed. "Too bad they're all gone..."

I, along with everyone else, burst into a laughing fit at the forlorn look on her face. It was a tragic expression, really. But the fact that it was caused by the lack of fries made it hilarious for some reason.

"What time is it?" I asked as we all settled down.

"19:14," Luke grinned from beside me. I rolled my eyes and elbowed him playfully.

"What's the _normal_ time, dummy? You know I suck at military time!"

He laughed, placing an arm around my shoulders and pulling me into his chest. "It's 7:15," he whispered into my hair before kissing the side of my head gently.

There was a small sigh across the table and I looked over to find everyone watching us like we were the cutest thing to exist. Well, the other girls looked that way at least...

"Thanks little penguin boy," I smiled up at him and kissed his cheek. "My mom wants me home by nine. We have plans tonight. We're gonna Netflix and chill," I reminded him quietly, making him nod.

"We should do that one of these days," he chuckled. "Could be fun!"

"Sure. Sounds _awesome_ ," I teased.


	39. >Chapter Thirty-Nine<

I sat on the couch, wrapped in a blanket with a bag of microwave popcorn settled on my lap. My head was leaned against my mom's shoulder as "The Princess Diaries," my favorite childhood movie, played out on the screen before us.

"Kara," mom whispered as the end credits began to roll. It was late night now and I was honestly half asleep.

"Yeah mom?" I mumbled and let my eyes close.

"Can I talk to you about something?"

My eyes opened once again, and I sat up, looking at her. "Yeah. What is it?"

She hesitated, as if what she was about to say was going to upset me. "It's actually about you..." The way she brought her knees up to her chest and laid her forehead against them made her look much younger for some reason.

I swallowed hard and looked at the blanket wrapped around my shoulders. "W-what about me?"

"Not anything in particular," she started. "But I never get to talk to you anymore. I miss my Kar Bar..." She let out a sigh, and guilt overtook me.

I hadn't realized how much time I spent out of the house until now. I went to school, then usually went to Luke's place right after. I normally got home around nine or ten, did what homework I had left, then maybe got something to eat and went to bed. I hardly saw mom anymore, and apparently it was starting to impact her.

"It's just... Before I say anything, I want you to know how proud I am of you for getting out of your comfort zone. I love that you have friends now that you can hang out with and talk to when you need them. And I'm so happy that you have Luke now and you're happy for once...

"But like I said, I never get to see you anymore. You're either at school or Luke's place which, I'll admit, is very adorable," she looked at me with a small smile. But I thought I also saw tears pooling in her hazel eyes. "You're never home anymore, and I feel like I'm missing out on my only baby girl's life..." She seemed to break at the words, and a tear slipped down her cheek. She quickly wiped it away, but I immediately leaned over again and wrapped my arms around her.

"I'm sorry mom," I whispered and felt a lump start to form in my own throat. "I-I didn't realize that you felt like this..."

"I didn't want to say anything because you finally have friends and a boyfriend and you just seem so happy all the time. You get up so well in the mornings, you have a smile on your face, and you talk _so_ much more than you used to. And I didn't want to ruin that..." She hugged me back, burying her face in my shoulder.

"Still. I don't want you to be lonely mom! We just moved halfway around the world. That's the last thing you need right now," I closed my eyes and tried to take deep breaths to keep from crying.

"But after your dad-" she choked back a sob. "After your dad, I wouldn't forgive myself if I ever tried to take away your happiness..."

My heart stopped in my chest and time seemed to freeze. She mentioned him... Since when was she ever alright with mentioning him?

Mom and I had been on our own for my entire life, and we'd made it, though we may have struggled at some times. But the seldom times she ever talked about dad, I could just tell how heartbroken she still was over him.

"I've never told you this Kara, but I need to tell you now," she continued and sniffled yet again. "When your father was in the hospital after the accident, on life support and in a coma, I went to visit him. You were born not too long after that, but I remember you just wouldn't stop kicking me that day. Well, I was sitting beside him, holding his hand, when you started throwing a fit inside me...

"So I took his hand and I placed it over you, and two things happened..." She whimpered into my shoulder as I tried to comfort her the best I could. "You stopped kicking Kara. As soon as his hand was on my stomach you were still, like you went to sleep. Until I had you a week and a half later, of course. But you know what else happened?"

"What happened mom?" Tears threatened to choke me at this point.

"H-he woke up. He felt you and he woke up. I watched as his fingers moved a bit, then his eyes fluttered open. I noticed that his pupils were dilated and as soon as the light hit them they shrank to pinholes. Funny, the things we remember sometimes, huh?" She gave a weak laugh and wiped at her eyes. "But Kara... He looked at me. For a solid twenty seconds we just watched each other. There was happiness in his eyes though. Like he knew something amazing was about to happen.

"He opened up his mouth, whispered how much he loved us both, th-then the monitor went b-blank..." Her words were clipped short by the fresh wave of tears that racked her frame. I finally couldn't handle the pressure anymore and let myself fall apart there on the couch.

Why hadn't she shared this story with me earlier? What was the point if I was going to find out sooner or later?

But... Hadn't she just been waiting for the right time to tell me? I couldn't blame her for that. I couldn't blame her for anything. She couldn't have done anything. She did her best to raise me well, and I appreciate every little thing she had done for me.

"Mom..." I whispered. "I'm so, so sorry....."

"He left us happy though. For that I'm thankful for. And his injuries from that crash were so bad. His suffering was at least shortened..." Mom sat up again, her eyes puffy with tears and her nose red and slightly runny. I hated seeing her like this.

"Why are you telling me all this now mom?" I asked quietly, wiping away my own tears.

"Because I want you to know that I love how happy Luke is making you, but I still want you to be careful with him. I want you to be happy for a long time to come, so if you think he's the one that'll make you happy, he's got my full support. If he hurts you though I'll be on him faster than you can blink."

I couldn't help but laugh a bit at the scenario. My mother, sitting on the couch with me with her puffy, tear soaked eyes and fierce threat.

"I know mom, and that's what makes you so amazing. You are always there for me. Dad would've been happy with how you've raised me. Also, rest assured I'll be careful with him. He _is_ my first boyfriend after all..."


	40. >Chapter Forty<

<Luke's POV>

I sat on my bedroom floor that night, plucking at the strings of my acoustic guitar. Melodies floated through my mind, but there were too many to pin down just one. I leaned my head back against my bed and groaned in frustration. _This needs to be perfect..._ That was the thought running through my head as I just sat there.

Shaking my head, I stood up and walked over to my dresser. Pulling out the top drawer, I dug through some shirts to find what I was looking for; the half-empty box of cigarettes and a little lighter. Picking them up, I slid one cigarette from the box and replaced it among my shirts. Putting them both in my pocket, along with my phone and guitar pick, I grabbed my guitar and made for the courtyard.

Since the interior of the building had a strict no smoking policy, I had to go out there every once in a while when things got...difficult. Sometimes I just got stressed or worked up, and it's not like it's my fault. Had I never met _certain_ _people_ , I'd have never even considered smoking.

I'd gotten better about it though. Before, when I was still with Kelsey, I'd smoke at least once a day. I couldn't help it. She rubbed off on me, and I regret every second I spent in her toxic presence. Now I did it once every few weeks, every few months if things were going well.

Hitting the button for the elevator, I waited for a moment or two for the doors to slide open. I pressed the lobby level and leaned my head against the back wall, closing my eyes. The ride down only took about two minutes, but it was two minutes filled with blissful silence.

Soon, the doors slid open again, and there was someone standing there waiting to go up to their flat. I nodded to him and exited, then made my way to the door outside. As soon as it was closed behind me I knew I was alone in the space. Smiling to myself, I went and sat on my usual bench. I left the cigarette and lighter in my pocket for now, deciding I'd use them when I needed to.

I went back to trying to figure out the melody to the song I was trying to write. It was a special song, one that meant a lot to me... It was supposed to show how, no matter what, there's always a way out of a bad situation. There's always a way you can make it out alive.

And I was writing it for Kara.

Of course, I had already technically written 'Beside You' for her, as that was the name we'd come up with. But that was already partially written, I'd just attached the lyrics her.

With this one, I wanted it to mean something to her, _to us_. I'd already come up with many of the lyrics, and now I just had to figure out which lines to place where.

Suddenly a wave of inspiration washed over me and the chords I had strummed sounded perfect together. I experimented with a few more notes and patterns, and soon I had the chorus. It didn't take me long to find the chords for the verses after that, but something still seemed missing.

A band.

As I sat there wondering how to make this song perfect for Kara, I felt my mind fog up with stress and worry. Slowly, I reached into my pocket and retrieved the cigarette and lighter. Looking at the small stick in my fingers for a moment, I placed it between my lips and lit a flame on the lighter. Holding it near the end of the cigarette, I stopped to think.

Should I really do this to myself? What's the point anymore? I hardly ever smoke anymore, so how hard could it be to just stop? I mean, I had enough reason to since Kara seemed so uncomfortable and shaken by me doing it last time.... Maybe it was for the best.

Letting the flame go out, I let the unlit cigarette dangle from my mouth for a few long moments before I made up my mind. Placing my guitar gently on the bench beside me, I walked to the rubbish and took one final look at the lighter and cigarette before tossing them. Returning to the bench, I felt a wave of satisfaction and pride.

She really did make me a better person...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I held my breath as the phone rang. On the third tone, there was a soft click followed by the sound of a soft, groggy voice.

"Hey Lukie," Kara yawned.

"Morning Kar," I smiled to myself, rubbing my eyes in exhaustion. "How'd you sleep last night?"

She was quiet for a moment, before replying with a simple, "Alright, I guess. What about you?"

"I didn't really fall asleep last night..." I admitted.

"You mean you just pulled an all-nighter for no reason?" Laughter rang out from the other end of the line. Even when she just woke up her laughter brought a broad smile to my face.

"Well, there _was_ a reason I was up all night," I explained. "But you aren't allowed to know that reason yet."

"Why not?" I could tell a fake pout was present on Kara's lips from the way she sounded.

"Because. It's just a surprise. If you're free today I could show you, but if not you'll have to wait at least until school."

"Dammit Luke," she huffed. "I'm going out with Malaya and Eve today... Promise me I'll find out what it is tomorrow though?"

"Or I might just wait until the right time to give it to you," I grinned to myself.

"You're so annoying sometimes..." A soft chuckle sounded over the line and made my insides churn.

"It's a gift, really," I joked. "If it's ready by tomorrow you can have it then. How about that?"

"Alright. It's a deal. So what are your plans for this wonderful day of the weekend?"

"I'm probably gonna stay home and work on your present honestly," I shrugged. "That and sleep."

"Is it really that big?" Kara's voice was almost hesitant, as if she wasn't sure how she felt about it.

"No. Not big, just...important. I want it to be perfect because it means a lot to me, and I want it to mean a lot to you too..." I moved from my sitting position atop my bed to lay on my side, one hand under my head and the other holding my phone to my ear.

"Luke, anything you do for me means the world. You should know that by now," she sighed. "Your existence in my life is enough for me."

"Well I still want it to be perfect so joke's on you," I smiled for the umpteenth time to myself.

"Alright then. I should probably go get dressed for the day..." She sounded a bit disappointed. I could obviously agree since I wouldn't be able to show her the song today, but sometimes it's good to have a day off from being in a relationship. Right?

"Yeah. I should probably try to get some sleep anyway. I love you Kara," I said softly. The words still made me feel so good inside.

"Love you too Luke. Go sleep before you fall over, because you sound exhausted."

I chuckled, closing my eyes. "I'm already laying down."

"Good. See you tomorrow," she replied softly.

"See you then," I agreed before we both hung up and sleep overcame me.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I woke to the sound of my phone going off. Jumping a bit at the loud ringtone, I quickly answered the call.

"Hello?" I hadn't looked at the caller ID before picking up.

"Hey, this is Luke right?" It was a guy, and his voice sounded familiar. Michael.

"Yeah. What's up Michael?" I rubbed at my eyes and looked at my alarm clock. 13:42. Only about four hours of sleep.

"Well, remember on the way to autumn formal how we were talking about maybe getting together to have, like...a jam session or whatever?" He sounded a bit hesitant but excited.

I nodded to myself, smiling a bit. "Yeah. You wanna do that today I assume?"

"Well I figured since Malaya, Kara, and Eve are all going out today, us boys might as well hang out too. Only seems reasonable."

"I think that sounds like an awesome idea. What time are we meeting up? And where?" I pulled myself up into a seated position, scratching my shoulder.

"Well Ashton offered to let us come over his place. He has a little house just out of the city and that's obviously where his drums are so I figured we might as well do that. And Calum's already said yes. So you can go over around like 2:30 or so. I'll text you the address."

"Awesome. I'll be there!"

"Cool. See you then!"


	41. >Chapter Forty-One<

"Nice guitar mate," Michael grinned as I removed my acoustic guitar from its case, placing it on the couch in Ashton's basement.

"Thanks. It's nice to know a guy who appreciates guitars," I laughed and shut the case again. Both he and Calum had arrived before me, leaving me to make an awkward, late entrance.

"So. What kinds of music do you guys listen to?" Calum asked as I turned to face them. Ashton sat behind a pretty large drum kit and a black bass hung from Cal's shoulder.

"Good Charlotte, Blink-182, Green Day, Nirvana, All Time Low, stuff like that," I shrugged. "What about you guys?"

"Good taste. All very good bands. What about stuff like Joy Division, the Ramones, and Jawbreaker?" Ashton twirled a drum stick expertly between his fingers.

"We have the best music taste ever. Just putting that out in the open..." Michael said deadpan. At that, we all broke into laughter. "Seriously though, I love all of those bands. I can play a lot of songs by a lot of them too."

"What do you say we play some then?" I grinned and picked up my guitar, sitting on the arm of the couch.

"Sounds good." Calum nodded.

For the next six and a half hours we played along to our favorite songs by our favorite bands. I learned that all four of us were pretty damn good at our instruments, especially Ashton. He seemed to take drumming very seriously, and by the end of the day his skin glistened with a coat of sweat.

"I'm wiped guys," he huffed as we ended All Time Low's 'Dear Maria.' I gave a nod of agreement, as did Michael and Calum.

"I think that's the most fun I've had in a while," I admitted. And to be honest, other than the time I spent with Kara that was the most fun if had in a long, long time.

"Me too," Mikey sighed. "We should do this more often."

"I think we should make it a weekly thing. Maybe we could even do some videos and put them up online," Cal suggested with a shrug and a grin.

"That sounds like a great idea!" I agreed enthusiastically. Then something popped into my mind. "Can I play a song for you guys? I wrote it for Kara and I just had the idea to run it past you since you all obviously know a lot about music..." I explained slowly.

"Sure mate," Ash grinned and stood, walking around his drum kit to plop down in the middle of the couch. "Play away."

"Okay. Here goes then," I nodded, taking a deep breath and placing my fingers on the right chords.

_She sits at home with the lights out,_   
_Seein' life in different colors._   
_I think it's time that we wake up_   
_So let me take you away._

_We could run down the street_   
_With the stars in our eyes_   
_We could tear down this town_   
_In the dark of the night._   
_Just open the door_   
_We've got time on our side_   
_We can make it out alive._

_Hey we're takin on the world,_   
_I'll take you where you want to go._   
_Pick you up if you fall to pieces_   
_Let me be the one to save you._   
_Break the plans we had before_   
_Let's be unpredictable_   
_Pick you up if you fall to pieces_   
_Let me be the one to save you._

I sang the rest of the song, strumming along. As I played the last chord, I looked up to see the others looking at me closely. You could hear a pin drop, and I didn't know whether that was a good or bad thing.

"So...do you think she'll like it?" I asked, my voice barely above a whisper.

"Like it?" Michael quirked an eyebrow. "She's going to love it man."

"Thanks for sharing that with us too," Ashton added. "I can tell it means a lot to you." I simply nodded.

My gaze was drawn to Calum as he let out a small sigh. "What is it Cal?" I asked curiously.

"It's just... This makes me feel awful about how I've treated girls in the past. Kara just seems to mean so much to you and I-I just... I've never felt that with anyone. And I really want to have that with someone, you know?" He shrugged and glanced at his feet.

It was Michael who stood up and walked to Cal's side, clapping him on the back. "Keep your head up mate. The right girl will come around eventually and she'll change everything. You've just gotta be patient."

"Thanks Mikey," he smiled.

"I feel like something is missing from the song," I admitted after a moment.

"Like a band?" Ashton grinned.

"Yeah. Like a band." I nodded and idly plucked at my guitar strings.

"We could probably help you with that." Michael turned and grinned.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I stood on the metro platform later, after we had finished working on the song. I'd decided before going to Ashton's that it would be easier to take the train than driving and having to figure out all the directions as his place was across the city.

My guitar sat in its case on my lap, and I sat on a bench against a wall. I still had about an hour until the next train, as I had just missed the last one. So I just sat there, watching as trains stopped and boarded passengers, or simply whizzed past. Then an idea struck me.

Opening my guitar case, I retrieved the instrument and placed the case on the ground in front of me. Picking up my pick, I placed my hands on the strings and began strumming the song I'd written for Kara. As the lyrics came, I took a breath and started singing along.

At first my playing and singing went unnoticed. I kept my eyes on my fingers as they shifted on the frets. What few people were still out at this time simply walked past without a backward glance at me, which I honestly didn't mind. Because right there in that train station, I was playing a song I had written for the girl I couldn't live without. If people weren't willing to listen to me, then I didn't want them to.

As I played the last few notes I noticed a pair of legs a little distance away. Looking up I found a girl who looked only a little younger than me looking at me carefully. She wore a black v-neck, a bright purple skirt, and black tights that looked like they were put in a washing machine full of razors. Her studded boots came up to her shins, and her bag had an anarchy symbol on the front. Her short, spiky hair was streaked with red, and black lipstick covered her mouth, which was shaped into a small smile. Her green eyes were trained on me , and we just looked at one another for a long time before she spoke.

"That song must be for someone very special," she began in a soft voice that I wasn't expecting to come out of a person like her. "I can tell by the way you were singing. You sang every word as if it could save the world, as if you might break from all those emotions you probably feel about whomever they're written for. Am I right?"

I nodded, the corner of my mouth quirking up into a half smile. "Couldn't be more correct," I chuckled. "I wrote it for my girlfriend. She means the world to me," I admitted. "I'd give up or do anything for her. So yes. It was written for someone very special."

"She's lucky then. To have a boyfriend that writes you songs must be pretty awesome. You sounded really good by the way. I'd buy your song if I could. But I'm guessing since you aren't being mobbed by crazy girls you haven't been discovered yet, which is a shame." She stepped forward, coming to stand next to me. She removed her bag, placing it on the bench and looking through it. She then pulled out a few dollars and placed them in my guitar case, which still lay open at my feet. "It's all I've got at the moment but I think you deserve it."

I looked at her for a moment, shocked that she just did that. "Th-thank you," I smiled. "What's your name?"

"That doesn't matter. But what's yours? I want to keep an eye out for the day you become famous. Then I'll be able to say I gave you some cash in the subway before you got big," she grinned.

"Well you're actually the first person to every do this, so that's extra bragging rights as well. That's assuming I ever get signed too," I chuckled. "Anyway, my name is Luke Hemmings."

"Well, Luke Hemmings, I look forward to the day I can buy that song," the girl smiled once more before turning and walking away, leaving me to ponder what just happened.


	42. >Chapter Forty-Two<

<Kara's POV>

I stepped through the door to school the next morning, only to be swept into a pair of familiar, strong arms. Luke spun me around once, before placing me back on the floor in a small fit of giggles.

"Good to see you too," I said after I finally stopped laughing. He simply gave me a happy grin before he leaned down to kiss my nose. I wasn't sure if he was aware, but I absolutely loved when he did that...

"How was your girl day yesterday?" He asked curiously as he slung an arm across my shoulders. I leaned into his side and breathed him in for a moment, almost forgetting we were walking down the hall at school.

"Very nice. We went shopping and got ice cream and it was wonderful. How did your day go?" I inquired just as curiously. He _had_ promised to give me whatever this surprise was today.

"Very well. I slept a bit then hung out with the guys. It was a day filled with testosterone and music and I really needed that." He chuckled and kissed my hair.

"You seem to be in a very happy mood today. It's really cute," I smiled and looked up at him.

"Well I do have that surprise to give you. But not until after school. It's not at my place either so you'll have to ride with me because I don't feel like giving you the directions," he winked and gave me a cheeky grin.

I rolled my eyes, playfully shrugging his arm off my shoulders as we reached my locker. "I never thought you were this lazy."

"That and I also like driving you places," he shrugged and pulled his lip ring between his teeth, an action that made me weak in the knees.

I could only smile as I opened my lock, retrieved my necessary books, and relocked it with by bag inside.

"I do actually have two surprises though. One isn't really an object, well technically they both aren't, but I do have something important to tell you," he said softly as I turned to face him.

My brain went into overdrive, wondering what he was about to say. "Yeah?" I cocked my head slightly.

"I, um... Well, when I was working on the main gift I got really stressed. And as you can probably guess, I don't usually handle my stress very well. So I went outside and I was planning on smoking a cigarette to calm me down..." He looked down at the floor at this point and I wondered where on earth he could be going with this.

"But as I was about to light it, I stopped. And I thought, _What would Kara say? How would she respond to me doing this to myself?"_ At this, he looked back up at me with a smile. "So I threw it away." The last part was no more than a whisper that gave me chills.

"You threw the cigarette away?" I asked quietly, trying to clear my head.

He nodded, reaching up to scratch the back of his neck. "Yeah. I mean, I remember how much you hate it and how you reacted to me smoking last time, so I decided I'd stop. For you."

I stood there for a moment, stunned. How did I have enough influence over someone that I could get them to give up an addiction? How much did I truly mean to this boy if he'd give up his stress reliever for me? Just to make me a little more comfortable around him?

"L-Luke... If that's your way of getting rid of your stress and as long as you try not to do it around me its okay..." I shook my head.

"Well if I'm gonna be in a band I probably shouldn't do it an-"

"You're in a band?" I cut him off suddenly. Blood flushed his cheeks as he chuckled softly.

"Well, yeah kinda. That was actually supposed to be part of the other surprise, actually. But now you know," he grinned.

"That's awesome! What are you guys gonna be called? Who's in it?" I asked excitedly.

"We don't have a name yet, and you'll find out sooner or later," he replied mischievously, trying to cover up his grin with a kiss to my forehead.

"I'd better. And I'd better hear you guys eventually," I rolled my eyes again. "Now we need to go to class. The bell's gonna ring soon."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Are we going to a store? Or a park? Just tell me the general place itself at least," I pleaded from the passenger seat of Luke's car. We were en route to wherever this surprise was, and I was almost dying of anticipation.

"Nope. You aren't getting a word out of me," he chuckled.

"Luke!" I groaned in exasperation.

"Quit whining Kara, we'll be there in like two minutes," he sighed, though through my eyelashes I could see a smile still sitting on his lips.

I huffed and crossed my arms, pulling my legs up onto the seat so I could lean my forehead on my knees. "Fine. I'm timing you though," I giggled quietly. His only reply was another chuckle.

Sure enough, two minutes later we pulled into the driveway of a small house that looked very homey already. I turned to Luke, one eyebrow raised. "Who's house is this?" I asked the obvious question.

"You ask too many questions. Just get out of the car," he shook his head with a smile and took the keys out of the ignition. Rolling my eyes, I opened the car door and stepped out. Waiting a moment or two for Luke to do the same, I followed him to the front door, which was painted bright red. He laced his fingers through mine and smiled for the millionth time before raising a hand to knock.

We waited a few seconds before there were thumping footsteps on the other side of the door. It then swung inward to reveal a very familiar, dimpled face. "Hey guys. We've been expecting you," Ashton greeted. "Come on in." He stepped aside to admit us into a cheerful, wonderful-smelling foyer. I would have been surprised at the warm herbal scent had it been anyone other than Ash. He always seemed to smell good.

Closing the door behind us, he clapped his hands together and took a deep breath. "I'm gonna take a guess here and say you're here for that surprise, right?" His eyes twinkled mischievously as Luke nodded. "Follow me then."

We trailed behind him as he walked toward a door leading to what I'd guess to be a basement. The steps leading down were confirmation as we descended into an open space. There, I was pleasantly surprised to find Michael and Calum with instruments hanging from their shoulders. There was a cajon at the end of a row of three stools, which Ash immediately walked over to. I recognized Luke's acoustic guitar resting on a stand near the wall, and I slowly pieced everything together.

"So... This is your band?" I asked slowly. Looking up at the tall blond boy at my side, he nodded.

"Yup. And they are actually helping with the surprise. Now go sit down," he grinned and nodded toward a couch facing the boys. I smiled and did just that, pulling my legs up so I sat Indian-style on the cool leather. Luke walked over and picked up his guitar, before making his way to sit between Cal and Mikey.

"So if you hadn't guessed already, the surprise is a song," Luke said softly. "I wanted to give you something just because, but I wanted it to be more personal and unique. Then I got the idea to write a song, so that's what I did..."

I couldn't help the broad grin that stretched across my face at his words. The similar look he wore told me he felt the same.

"So I guess we'll play it for you now..." Luke's voice, had I not been so familiar with it, would have sounded perfectly normal as he murmured the words into the mic. But I could hear the slight tremble and nervousness of it. I could sense how nervous he was, which he obviously shouldn't have been.....

It started out with a few simple notes. Then Ashton added a laid back and steady beat along with Calum's bass. I felt my insides bunch up as I watched Luke and he watched me, the precision between our eyes like that of a surgeon.

I wasn't expecting to have the wind knocked out of me though.

I wasn't expecting to end up crying in Luke's arms after the song had finished.

_He wrote that for me._

_He wrote me a song..._

_What do I really mean to him?_


	43. >Chapter Forty-Three<

I couldn't get the song out of my head. No matter what I did it was there, on a constant loop of pure emotion and Luke's voice. I thought about him a lot before, but now that I had this part of him, he was more ingrained in my being than ever before.

Even as they played covers of a few other songs, I was only half listening. I was just floored. Taken aback that he did this for me. I was stuck in a daze that he had created with a simple song. It probably wasn't his intent, but he had me completely enamored.

That night, I just laid in bed, images playing on the backs of my eyelids. I didn't sleep at all. Sure, I was probably making a bigger deal about this than I needed to, but God dämmit I just didn't even know what to do with this boy anymore.

The next morning brought purple shadows beneath my eyes and a considerable amount of concealer to try to cover them up. I couldn't stop yawning, yet I was more anxious to see Luke than I had been in a while. I think the idea of talking to him about the meaning of the song intimidated me a bit. I mean, of course I knew it was about us and whatnot, but it seemed to be more than that.

I sighed and grabbed my things, checking my appearance in the full-length mirror hanging on my wall on the way out. A simple pair of fleece-lined, black leggings, gray Converse, and my favorite sweater that looked like it was three sizes too big and was warm enough that I didn't even need a coat in the chilly autumn weather. My hair was down and a bit drab looking, and I had to wear my glasses as I had forgotten to tell mom that I needed to get some new ones ordered. I shook my head and just decided my appearance was what it was before I kept walking.

"Oh sweetie, did you run out of contacts?" That's the first thing my mother said as I walked into the kitchen. Not, "Good morning sweetheart," or "What would you like for breakfast honey?"

"Yeah. I forgot to tell you. It's fine though. The glasses go with my _look_ today," I replied a bit sarcastically as I gestured to my "I'd-much-rather-be-at-home-eating-and-watching-Netflix" outfit.

"If you say so," she chuckled before picking up her keys and purse. "Have a good day at school sweetie."

"I'll try." With that, she kissed my hair and was off to work. I put my bag on the kitchen table and paused for a moment. The space felt different today for some reason. Now, granted, the kitchen wasn't that big of a room to begin with. The pale yellow walls and rich brown cabinets gave it a homey feeling to start with. I wasn't sure what it was, but I just felt like I still wasn't alone.

Hesitantly, I made coffee and looked for appealing breakfast food before I decided I'd just get a protein bar or two. Padding over to the pantry, I pulled open the door.

I was instantly pulled into the somewhat small space as the door closed behind me. I would have screamed out but a hand covered my mouth instantly. I noticed that whomever was trapping me in the tight space was being pretty gentle with me.

"Before you talk, can I say something?" The man holding me, as it obviously wasn't a feminine figure, whispered in my ear. It sounded like Luke, but huskier. It couldn't have been him though because how would he be in my pantry?

Regardless, I nodded instantly. "Alright." He slowly lifted his hand from my mouth, only to wrap that arm around my shoulders. There was nothing dangerous about the way he held me, and it was when he started talking again that I realized who it actually was.

"I set this up with your mom because I wanted to make today really special. I know it doesn't seem like four months together is that long, but to me at least it's been the best four months of my life..." His lips pressed against my temple, giving me a moment to think.

Four months. That meant it had been almost five months since I'd moved from the U.S. and changed my life for the better. Almost five months since I met Luke and made actual friends. Since I'd learned to come out of my shell, how to give my heart and soul to another person to hold.

How had I forgotten this?

"Today, we aren't going to school. We're going to do whatever you want, other than the surprise I have planned for later. I'm not letting anything ruin today, not for you, and not for me either."

I felt my cheeks warm as he kissed my collarbones, though he obviously didn't see it due to the darkness. I was about to open my mouth to respond, but at that moment there was the low buzz of a cell phone and I knew it wasn't mine.

With a quiet sigh, Luke straightened a bit. "Hold that thought." He pulled out his phone, and upon seeing who it was, I felt him tense behind me.

"Who is it?"

"The last person I want to talk to at the moment. Actually, if I had a choice I'd never talk to her again..." he growled at his screen.

"And who would that be?"

".......my mum....."


	44. >Chapter Forty-Four<

"What do you mean it's your mom? I thought you two weren't on speaking terms..." I asked in utter confusion.

"I guess she thinks we are," he sighed.

"Are you going to answer?" I turned to face him slightly as his phone kept buzzing.

"I think I'll try to talk to her." He took a deep breath and answered slowly. "Hello?"

I stood there for a moment or two in silence as she spoke through the phone. I could feel the tension in Luke's body as he listened.

"Since when are you suddenly worried in how I'm doing?" He retorted. I could feel his heart beat increasing as I was leaned against his chest and it honestly made me nervous.

"I'm not saying that, but you haven't made any effort to contact me since I left! So I guess in a way I _am_ saying you don't care."

A longer moment of silence. I could make out a few words his mother was saying in a louder tone. It sounded like she was accusing him of refusing to let her keep in touch.

"My life is finally starting to go right, mom. I don't need you coming in and fúcking it all up. I'm doing fine on my own, I have a girlfriend now, I don-" His mother cut him off promptly following the word girlfriend.

"Yes, I _do_ have a girlfriend. She's my everything and she makes me happy," he replied a moment later. His tone was much softer as he pressed a soft kiss on my hair. He held me a bit tighter, as if making sure I was still there. "Today's actually our four month anniversary, so if you're done prying in my life, I'd like to get back to our plans." He sounded bitter once again, and I sighed quietly.

"No- mom, I'm not c- I said no mom! I don't need to go see you now, or ever for that matter," he hissed, tensing yet again. The darkness was beginning to get claustrophobic and I prayed his mom would just let us be soon.

"Fine. If she really wants to, I'll _consider_ it. But only if Ben and Jack are there. I don't need to get into a fight with you in front of her, and they know how to keep the peace..." Another pause before he let out a breath through his nose that tickled my cheek. "Fine. I'm hanging up now," he stated before immediately ending the call.

We stood there for another moment or two in silence before I shifted. "Can we not hang out in the pantry all day? It's getting a bit stuffy." My voice was a mere whisper, but in the awkward quiet, the sound was much louder.

"Good idea," he murmured and reached in front of me to open the door. Letting me out first, he followed behind. We both narrowed our eyes, letting them adjust to the sudden light streaming through the large window above the sink.

I turned to look at Luke for the first time that day and couldn't help the smile that settled on my lips. He looked like he'd just rolled out of bed and threw on a pair of his usual skinny jeans, and a dark canvas-like jacket. Stubble dusted his chin and his hair wasn't in its normal quiff, but rather it was deflated and swept to the side underneath his favorite gray beanie. I loved every aspect of the look...

"Hi..." I mumbled as I buried my face in his chest and wrapped my arms around him. I noticed he smelled different today, more like he used to before autumn formal. It was the scent that lingered in his flat, on his sheets, and in the back of my mind. "You smell like you used to. It's nice," I thought aloud.

"I can't believe that's what you say after I practically had a fight with my mom on the phone," he chuckled softly, the sound rumbling in his chest as I kept breathing him in. I'd say I missed this smell, but I didn't really have that much exposure to it in the first place. It was still somewhat new to me.

"You just don't seem like you want to talk about it, so I figured I wouldn't ask," I shrugged and turned my head so my cheek was resting on the fabric of his jacket instead of my forehead. I listened to the steady sounds of his breathing and heart, the two beats intermingling to form a symphony only I could listen to.

He was quiet for a moment as he rested his chin on my head, his arms resting atop my shoulders as his fingers combed slowly through my hair. "Thank you..."

I nodded, and we stood there for a long time, just enjoying the small moment of peace and quiet. With the sunlight hitting us through the window and warming our already flushed skin, I tried to prolong this moment for as long as possible.

"So what would you like to do today?" Luke whispered, sounding a bit remorseful to ruin the bubble of silence. "We can do whatever you'd like."

"I want to do nothing, honestly. Maybe we could go to that restaurant we first went to together," I suggested.

"Alright then. We'll do nothing then," he chuckled again, causing me to grin widely.

"I'm gonna go change real quick then," I stepped back. I then remembered that we both had at least some sense of modesty. "You can find something to watch on Netflix if you want..." I suggested, not sure what else to say as I felt heat rise to my face at the thought of coming upstairs with me...

"Sounds like a plan," he nodded and looked at his feet, blushing a bit at the idea as well.

"The remote is on the couch, I think. Be right back," I concluded quickly before pecking him on the cheek and hurrying up the stairs. I changed into a pair of shorts and an oversized pullover before throwing my hair into a bun and calling it a day. When I returned downstairs, I found Luke sprawled on the couch his jacket removed to reveal a simple light gray tee. He looked so at home lying there with the remote in hand and his feet hanging off the end of the sofa that it made my heart flutter.

"So, would this count as that Netflix and chill date I promised you?" I asked as I stepped around the end of the couch. He turned his eyes to me with a grin.

"I think that's an overly sexualized phrase, but yes, I suppose that's what it would be considered," he smirked.

"I don't know how I feel about that tone," I rolled my eyes and nudged his arm out of the way before settling on the couch as well. My back was pressed to his chest, our bodies fitting together like a pair of puzzle pieces, a lock and key. We belonged like that, together, each complimenting the other like night and day. I felt whole with Luke, and something told me he felt the same.

"I love you," he whispered against my neck as he secured an arm around my waist.

"I love you too," I replied before shifting a bit to kiss his forehead. A show started playing, and I looked over to find some cartoon playing. I had no idea what it was, but I didn't really care as I laid there molded to Luke.

"So about earlier..." He mumbled against my shoulder after a few minutes of the show.

"What about it?"

"Well...my mom suggested some stuff..."

I froze. I wasn't expecting to talk about that right now. I wasn't expecting to talk about it _at all_ , in fact. Now that he was bringing it up, I wasn't sure if I was ready for their conflict. But even if I wasn't ready, I'd try to help him any way I could. That's what a good friend does, so it's definitely what a good girlfriend would do.

"Stuff like what?" I swallowed harshly.

He hesitated, squeezing his eyes shut and placing his forehead on my shoulder. "Sh-she wants to-" he seemed to choke on the words.

"She wants to meet you..."


	45. >Chapter Forty-Five<

<Luke's POV>

Every word was ringing in my head. I couldn't focus on anything as I lay there with Kara watching some stupid cartoon that didn't even make any sense. The prior events were spinning through my mind, and I seemed to have lost all sense of control over them. Like when you spin a top on your finger, and you end up moving your hand to keep it balanced as it seems to move on its own.

It started once I knocked on the door...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

_"Is Kara awake yet?" I asked as we walked inside. Her mum led me to the kitchen, where she finished putting a few dishes away._

_"Not yet. I was just about to go get her. Is there anything I could help with? And please, just call me Maria," she smiled and glanced over at me._

_"Well, it's our four month anniversary, and I wanted to do something special for her. Would it be alright if we spent the day together?" I asked a bit hesitantly._

_"Will there be any illegal activities or...other things involved?" Questions any good mother would ask._

_"Oh no, of course not. I just wanted to surprise her with whatever she wanted to do, then take her to a concert tonight." I smiled at the thought of just spending the day with her. "It's that band she loves so much, Twenty One Pilots. I got the tickets a while back when the first went on sale because I knew that would be our four month," I explained._

_She turned around with a smile on her face. "How on earth did you get those tickets? They must have cost an arm and a leg..."_

_"So it's a yes then?" I raised an eyebrow._

_"Of course. I think that's the sweetest idea."_

_"Thank you so much," I grinned. "And don't worry about the cost. I got pre-sale tickets so they were cheaper."_

_"Well, I should probably go make sure she's u-" She was cut off as a faint beeping started from upstairs, which I guessed was Kara's alarm clock. "Never mind then. Oh! You should hide then jump out and surprise her!"_

_"That sounds like a great idea. Where should I go?" I looked around in search of a spot when Maria hurried over to a door. Opening it, I was greeted with a pantry that could fit two people easily._

_"How about in here?" She grinned._

_~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~_

_"I think I'll try to talk to her." I took a deep breath and answered slowly. "Hello?"_

_"Lukey? It's you right? Oh I've missed you sweetheart. How are you?" My mother sounded just like she used to, and it bright back a wave of awful memories._

_"Since when are you suddenly worried in how I'm doing?" I retorted, my heart beating faster. Kara leaned into me a bit more, the feeling doing little to calm me._

_"Are you saying I don't care about you? That I don't think about you every day?!" She sounded almost hurt. Almost._

_"I'm not saying that, but you haven't made any effort to contact me since I left! So I guess in a way I am saying you don't care."_

_"Well it's not like you made it easy for me to keep in contact! You change your number every so often, and I never know if it's going to be you or some random wrong number! I_ want _to know what's going on in your life, Luke, but you never let me!" Her voice was loud now as she tried to defend herself._

_"My life is finally starting to go right, mom. I don't need you coming in and fúcking it all up. I'm doing fine on my own, I have a girlfriend now, I don-" I was immediately cut off then._

_"You have a girlfriend now?!"_

_"Yes, I do have a girlfriend. She's my everything and she makes me happy," my tone was much softer as i pressed a soft kiss to Kara's hair. I held her a bit tighter, hoping this wouldn't scare her. "Today's actually our four month anniversary, so if you're done prying in my life, I'd like to get back to our plans." My tone was bitter once again, and Kara sighed quietly._

_"Well, I'm having a family get together in two weeks and I want you to be there. No one's seen you in a long time and we all are getting worried."_

_"No- mom, I'm not c-"_

_"Yes you are!"_

_"I said no mom! I don't need to go see you now, or ever for that matter," I hissed, feeling my chest tighten. Kara was being completely quiet, and it was worrying me._

_"Oh, come on Luke! You can bring your girlfriend. I'm sure she's curious about your family, right?" She almost sounded smug._

_"Fine. If she really wants to, I'll consider it. But only if Ben and Jack are there. I don't need to get into a fight with you in front of her, and they know how to keep the peace..."_

_"They've already confirmed they were coming. We were only waiting on you," she agreed._

_"Fine. I'm hanging up now," I stated before immediately ending the call._

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Luke!" Kara's hand waved in front of my face. "Earth to boyfriend."

"Sorry, sorry... I got a bit lost in my head," I apologized.

"Is everything alright?" She shifted in my arms, her body facing mine as she placed a hand on my cheek. "You look sort of upset..."

"N-no. I'm fine. I was just thinking..." I shook my head and pinched the bridge of my nose as I squeezed my eyes shut. Shivers raced down my spine as I felt her thumb ghost over my bottom lip, making me look at her again.

"If you need to talk about it I can listen. Just remember that okay?" She whispered, her eyes on mine and her brows drawn together in worry.

I sighed and placed my forehead against hers. "I just don't understand why she had to call me _today_. I mean, of all the days of the year, why today?"

"Maybe that's what was meant to happen... It didn't ruin my day, so you shouldn't let it ruin yours," she shrugged. "Don't worry about it until tomorrow if it makes you feel better about it..."

"But I don't know if I'm ready to have you meet my family, Kara. We're very problematic."

"I _want_ to meet your family though. It's not like my mom and I have never been problematic before."

I didn't know what to say. No one I'd ever been with had been to me what Kara is. No one had stuck around for as long as her, no one had cared about me the way she did, and it felt nice. I had never trusted anything with some of the things I trusted her with, like the stories behind my tattoos for example. Not only was she the only one to ever ask about them, but she was the only one I'd ever consider telling about them.

So now was the biggest thing I could trust her with, the thing that very well might make her rethink being with me.

My family.


	46. >Chapter Forty-Six<

>Kara's POV<

Nervousness set in as I sat in the passenger seat of Luke's car. It was nearly five o'clock, and we were in downtown Sydney. Why we were here, he refused to tell me. Thankfully, I somewhat remembered the way to the tattoo parlor so at least I knew it wasn't that. I don't think I could deal with that again...

"Why won't you just tell me where we're going?" I asked again, trying to ignore the anxiety in my chest.

"Because if you knew it wouldn't be much of a present would it?" He sighed. "I promise it's a good thing though. You'll enjoy it," he glanced at me with a mischievous grin.

"I hope you know how much anxiety you're giving me right now," I muttered stubbornly and crossed my arms over my chest.

"Just be patient," he replied calmly, keeping his eyes on the road as we took another turn.

"See that line going around the corner?" He pointed a bit abruptly to where there was in fact a line of people wrapped around the corner of a building.

"Yeah. What about them?" I shrugged.

"We get to go ahead of them."

"What are you talking about? Why would we cut all those people? Where are we even go-" I stopped talking as we started passing people. I looked back and saw band shirts, all similar and familiar.

Twenty One Pilots.

"What's the date today?" I asked urgently.

Knowing I was putting all the pieces together, Luke laughed for a few moments before responding. "It's the seventh of June, of course."

"Isn't that when- Did you- Are we-" I couldn't get out a complete sentence as I stared at him blankly, realization hitting me right then.

"Are we going to the Twenty One Pilots concert? Because if that was your question, yes. That was the surprise," he answered calmly, pulling around the corner and heading to the parking garage. "Plus, I know a few people who work at the theater so I pulled some strings. We've got VIP parking and early admission to the general admission section right up front," he added before turning into the garage.

I gawked at him, unable to speak. Here I was, about to see possibly my favorite band, and he was just sitting beside me grinning away like he knew about this for months. He probably did, considering the fact that he probably had to get the tickets before they ran out.

"Just you wait until this car is parked," I shook my head, wanting to hug the him right this second. We stopped at the entrance, where a kind woman took his parking ticket and let him into the VIP parking area. There were only a few cars there, and I suspected it would be a lot easier to get out than if we'd had to park higher up.

Pulling into a space, he put the car in park and before he even took the keys out, I leaned over the center console to kiss him shortly. I really just wanted to get out so I could hug him, so I undid my seat belt and did just that. He laughed as he did the same, before I ran around the hood of the vehicle and buried my face in his jacket.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you...." I grinned against his chest, unable to contain my sheer joy. "Do you know how much this means to me? You- How did I get lucky enough to meet you? How did I ever end up with you? I mean, honestly..." I rambled on.

"Actually, you weren't that lucky when I met you, remember? You got tripped by one of my idiot friends," he chuckled.

"True," I laughed. Looking up at him, I couldn't wipe the smile off my face as he kissed me sweetly over and over again. "I love you so much..."

"Well, what are we standing around here for? We do have early admission don't we?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It got really hot and sweaty really fast. Being in the front of general admissions meant we were also pressed against the barricade right in front of the stage. We also had nowhere to go, as everyone surged forward instead of leaving any room to breath.

Normally, I probably would've had a panic attack due to claustrophobia. But the feeling of Luke standing just behind me, allowing me to have about an inch or two between my ribs and the barricade, was comforting and familiar.

I think people have us at least enough room to breath since he had gone home to change into a black Nirvana muscle tee. That meant his tattoos were out and, though many people here had them, I think the combination of the large amount of ink on his skin and his towering stature intimidated the screaming girls and other young adults around us.

"You alright?" He bent down to half shout in my ear. The pre-concert music was pretty deafening, and I could still only barely hear him.

"Pfft. I've never been better," I grinned before quickly adding, "Well, almost never. You've made me pretty happy before," I winked.

"I'd hope," he laughed.

Soon, the show began and the lights went out. The crowd seemed to simultaneously erupt while they held their breath in anticipation for Tyler and Josh to appear onstage. There was a deafening sound as they began, the speakers so loud I felt my teeth rattle. I loved it all.

The performance flew by, over in what seemed like the blink of an eye. The crowd moshed just behind us, and Luke and I even joined in for about a song before it got a bit too crazy and claustrophobic. As the guys left the stage after the encore, the lights returned and it was all over.

Drenched in sweat and what felt like a layer of grime from the concrete ground and jumping people, I turned to Luke with an elated grin on my face.

"Best. Night. Ever," I whispered in his ear as I reached up to wrap my arms around his neck. I hid my face in his shoulder as his warm arms circled my waist protectively.

"Me too," he murmured in reply. Our breathing was heavy in the now somewhat humid space, and my veins were still buzzing with excitement along with my ears from the volume. "Let's try to get out of here before it gets too difficult," he suggested before kissing my temple. I nodded and he took my hand in his before we started wading through the sea of people trying to exit.

Countless "excuse me"s and "sorry"s were muttered as we were jostled around. Several times I had gotten separated from Luke for a moment or two before we found one another again. Each time I was on the verge of panic just as his hand grasped mine once more.

As we were approaching the exit to the street, though, that was a different story.

It was getting particularly difficult to move forward and it seemed as though many people were moving back. I stumbled over a leg, regained my balance, then realized my hand was free of Luke's once again. I tried not to yell out for him, tried to take deep breaths and swallow my anxiety.

It didn't help as I was pushed backward sharply, causing my foot to slip from underneath me. I tumbled to the ground, lost in a sea of dark colored jeans and shoes that seemed to take on a new purpose: to trample me. I curled up instinctively, my mind blanking to everything but fear as the crowd jostled around me. Shoes came down on my hair, jerking my head around enough to bring tears to my eyes and practically set my scalp on fire with pain.

A pair of hands eased me to my feet, helping me stand when I was sure I never would. I turned around, hoping to find Luke, but it wasn't him. It was a tall girl about my age with shredded jeans and bright purple hair. She looked at me with concern as I tried to conjure a thought other than panic.

My breathing became quick and shallow, my heart going into overdrive. I felt like I was going to collapse, and honestly that's what I wanted to do. My lungs ached from the stuffy, sweaty air that surrounded me. The clamor dimmed to a low roar, and the girl who helped me up kept one hand on my shoulders as she guided me toward the exit.

It was slow, painful work, and my head still burned from all the people stepping on my hair, but eventually I was greeted by the blissfully cool, clean night air. I clutched my arms, leaning against the wall beside the door to catch my breath. I tried to let my lungs fill fully, but they still moved in short bursts of panic.

The girl stood in front of me, holding onto my shoulders with concern as she asked me questions I couldn't hear over the screaming in my head. I just needed Luke right now. I needed him and my mom and my bed and..... I needed everything that I didn't have right now.

I felt alone, suffocated, engulfed in fire that wasn't actually there. Once Luke found me and he had thanked the girl, I was exhausted yet more alert than I'd been in a long time. I still had trouble breathing, but now it wasn't in such shallow breaths. Now it just felt like I had something in front of my mouth and nose hindering my ability to get air in and out. Like I had something slowly suffocating me, wrapped around my neck.

But the only thing there when I checked my skin was my hair.


	47. >Chapter Forty-Seven<

The drive home was hell. The small space of the car felt even smaller than usual, and Luke ended up opening the window on my side of the car so I felt I could breath. The wind in my face helped a bit, but my heartbeat was still pounding in my ears, and everything still sounded a bit muted.

We rode in almost uncomfortable silence, though it would have been unbearable had it been anyone other than Luke. Granted, there was the sound of the radio playing music in the background and the rush of wind from the open window, but not a word was said after him asking what had happened and if I was alright.

Eventually, we pulled into my driveway, the headlights of the car shining brightly against the closed garage door before he took the keys from the ignition. We sat there for a moment, taking in the moment of total silence. It hung in the air of the car like poisonous gas, making me want to claw at my throat until I could breath once again.

Without a word, Luke slipped his hand into mine, which lay limply on my leg. His fingers threaded through mine, squeezing gently until I looked up at him hesitantly.

"You're alright now. You're okay. I'll never let anything happen to you like that again, alright?" His voice was little more than a whisper as I struggled to see his features. Even in the near-pitch-dark, concern and sincerity radiated from his words. I knew he meant them as I leaned over to rest my forehead against his shoulder. His free hand came to brush through my hair, reigniting the pain I felt from earlier. I flinched involuntarily, making him freeze. "What's wrong?"

"P-people kept stepping on my hair when I fell. My head's just a little sensitive right now," I assured him falsely. The touch brought back the helplessness I felt while I was on the floor, the feeling that I might as well just stay there and get trampled.

"Should I walk you in? Or are you alright now? I can do whatever you want."

I contemplated for a moment. It would be comforting to have him there tonight, but I was so exhausted and my nerves were so worn that I didn't think I could handle any kind of personal interactions.

"I think I'm alright now. I can text you if things get bad, but I should be fine," I shrugged and sat up a bit. "Thanks you..." I whispered. "Today was... Amazing. I can't thank you enough, Luke."

"Well how about instead of thanking me you go get some rest. You almost fell asleep on the way home," he chuckled softly and leaned his forehead on mine. "Promise me you won't do anything tonight..." His voice shook in desperation.

"I promise. I haven't for a while now. Won't happen tonight," I nodded. Leaning forward a bit more I placed one long, simple kiss on his lips before backing away and reaching for the door handle.

"I'll call you tomorrow, alright?" He asked, voice still colored with concern.

"Alright. Thank you again Luke. I love you," I smiled shortly as I opened the door.

"I love you too. Sleep well..."

"I'll try."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I didn't sleep well.

As a matter of fact, I hardly slept at all. Every time I closed my eyes long enough, images of the earlier events played on the backs of my eyelids, causing me to jolt awake with a gasp.

Eventually I gave up on sleep and sat there on my bed, trying my hardest to not think of what happened. Around four in the morning, things got very, very bad.

I stood from my bed, unable to stare into the darkness anymore. Pacing from one side of my room to the other, I fiddled with my hands, desperate to think of anything other than after the concert. But no matter what I did, everything led me to my panic attack.

I gave up on pacing and stepped into my bathroom. The lights burned my overly-dial aged eyes, before they quickly adjusted to the sudden exposure. I placed my hands on the counter, glaring at my reflection in the mirror, hating what I saw.

Where this came from, I had no idea. But what I saw looking back at me from that mirror was a girl who didn't fit in. A girl who didn't matter to anyone but a select few. She hardly had any friends, she wasn't even pretty. Her hair was too long, her roots starting to show beneath the fake black color. It was too long and stringy at the ends. Her nose was a little too round at the end, and her eyes weren't that nice almond shape she'd always wanted, always put in her drawings.

That girl was imperfect.

That girl was me.

I watched as if from a distance as the girl in the mirror reached for the drawer to her left. Opening it, she dug around for the pair of scissors she kept in there, before pulling them out with a look of curiosity in her hazel-brown eyes. She pondered what to do with them, wanting to destroy something to relieve her anger and self-hate.

Placing her fingers around the handles, she took a long strand of hair in her other hand. The scissors snipped off her hair like a knife cutting warm butter. Then it was on to the next section and the next until eventually she had a halo of blue hair surrounding her feet and choppy hair hanging above her shoulders.

Angry tears spilled from those hazel-brown eyes, and she was shaking uncontrollably. This girl couldn't have been me. This girl wasn't as strong as me, or as sure of herself.

Then I snapped back to reality. The scissors clattered from my hand, falling into the sink as I stared at my reflection in horror. I sank to my knees, paying no regard to the itchy strands of hair that clung to my legs as I ran my fingers through the now less-than-shoulder-length ones I had left.

An ugly sob racked through my body as I broke down. This was what I needed. To cry. To cry while no one was around to hear all the panic and fear from earlier leave my body through salty tears and gasping breaths. I cried until the sun peaked over the horizon, then I stood on aching legs and brushed the hair from my clothes and skin.

Making sure my curtains were closed fully, I crawled under my covers, too tired to move anymore or cry without tears. I had no reason to stay up right now, especially not when I just needed sleep. So that's what I did.

I slept.


	48. >Chapter Forty-Eight<

"Luke, I swear, it's fine."

"I just.... I feel so terrible about what happened..." His voice was quiet even coming from my phone. I was sat up on my bed, running my hands nervously through my now short, uneven hair.

Beauty tip: never cut your own hair while crying and having a panic attack. It won't turn out very well.

"I know. But it wasn't your fault we got separated. It wasn't your fault any of that happened," I shrugged.

"I still feel like it was though," he returned stubbornly. "Did you sleep well?"

There it was. The million dollar question. What would I say? _"Oh, you know. Just couldn't sleep because every time I closed my eyes I felt like I was going to get trampled again. So then I started pacing around. And did I mention I cut all my hair off on a whim because I hate the way I look?"_ That obviously wouldn't help anyone.

"I guess..." I lied, probably unconvincingly.

"You don't sound very sure of that, Kar. Did anything happen?" Guess my lie really wasn't convincing.

I was silent for a long time before he spoke again. "What happened?"

"Can I come over?" I finally muttered. I wouldn't be able to tell him over the phone.

"Of course you can."

"'Kay. I'll be over in a few..."

"I love you," he reminded me simply before I repeated the three words and we both hung up.

Taking a deep breath, I thanked the fact that mom had gotten called in to work today. I wasn't sure how to explain to her what happened to my hair. Getting up, I quickly put on a grey sweater and some jeans before slipping on a pair of shoes and heading downstairs. I was careful to avoid my reflection, not wanting to see the product of last night.

I drove as hastily as the speed limit would allow, eager to just get to his apartment. As I entered the lobby, the receptionist smiled and let me in, recognizing me from my normally daily trips in with Luke.

I took the elevator to the eight floor and practically ran to apartment 813, knocking on the door as tears started to prickle behind my eyes. Not ten seconds later, I was wrapped against Luke's chest. He kissed my head gently over and over again, telling me it was okay and that everything would be alright.

A minute or two later he took a small step back. His navy tee had two spots on it where my tears had soaked through, and concern was laced through his features as he looked me over. As I wiped at my eyes with my sweater, he understood what happened, why my hair was....destroyed, to say the least.

"Come on, no crying in the hall," he urged softly. I nodded and stepped inside fully, hearing him close the door behind me. I turned to face him again as I slipped my shoes off, seeing he was still in a pair of pajama pants. His hair was flat on one side and somewhat insane on the other.

"Kar..." he breathed, his eyes scanning my face, my hair, my hands as they fidgeted in front of me. "A-are you alright? Why didn't you call like you said you would?" His eyebrows drew together, forming a little line between them.

A small, bitter laugh escaped my mouth as I looked at the ceiling, trying to get rid of my tears. "Yeah, I'm just _peach you_. I also didn't think you would've wanted to get up at four in the morning, right?" The words were sharper than I'd anticipated, and I instantly wished I could take them back.

"For you, I'd stay up for days. You should know that by now..." He whispered, taking slow steps toward me. His hands slid beneath my hair, resting on my cheeks as he tilted my head down to press a kiss in the middle of my forehead. "I would have tried to help."

"I just didn't feel like bothering you," I choked out. "I needed a haircut anyway..." I tried to give a small laugh, but the lump forming in my throat made it difficult.

"Since when are you a barber?" He raised an eyebrow and smiled slightly.

My lips tilted up at the corners, a sigh coming out through my nose. With that, he swept an arm under my knees, making me gasp in surprise as he picked me up bridal style and carried me to his room. I was too exhausted to object as I simply leaned my head on his shoulder.

"If it counts for anything," he murmured in my ear, "I think it looks really good."

"Thanks, Luke," I smiled. He approached his bed before gently setting me atop the sheets. Taking a moment to kiss my forehead, he stood and went to pick up his acoustic guitar before sitting on the floor with his back against the bed. He positioned the guitar so it was comfortable and began strumming a few chords.

I lay down so my head was by his, allowing me to slowly brush back the hair that was hanging near his eyes. I kissed his temple as he started playing the song he'd written for me again. I closed my eyes, my hand still drifting through his silky hair as his voice rang out, soft but clear.

_She sits at home with the lights out,_   
_Seeing life in different colors_   
_I think it's time that we wake up,_   
_So let me take you away._

_We could run down the street,_   
_With the stars in our eyes,_   
_We could tear down this town,_   
_In the dark of the night._   
_Just open the door,_   
_We've got time on our side,_   
_We can make it out alive._

_Hey we're taking on the world,_   
_I'll take you where you wanna go._   
_I'll pick you up if you fall to pieces._   
_Let me be the one to save you._   
_Break the plans we had before,_   
_Let's be unpredictable_   
_I'll pick you up if you fall to pieces,_   
_Let me be the one to save you..._

The song ran through my veins, the words like ice water, the melody like molten gold. It washed over me, calming me down by the end. I felt much less stressed than I had before, all thanks to Luke's music...

"I think I'll call it 'Unpredictable,'" he whispered after the final chord had ended. "What do you think?"

"I think it's your song so you should call it whatever you want," I replied sarcastically. He chuckled, giving me a look. "I love it..." I smiled, kissing his cheek.

He smiled and began playing another song. As he started singing, my mind began to wander back to last night. But thinking about it now didn't make me want to cry. Instead it made me realize something about myself.

All this time, I felt strong and confident in myself. I was always happy to be me and be in the situation I was in at the moment. But it wasn't always like that. Before Luke came into the picture, I was much less confident than I am now. I was quieter and even more of an outcast than I am now. I didn't belong anywhere in America, and I knew it. All there was to me there was a pretty face who knew how to draw.

I was a rose that everybody cut down to get to where they needed to go, broken but still beautiful.

But here, halfway across the world and much further south than my old home in Minnesota, I felt like I finally belonged. I now had more than two friends, I had a boyfriend whom I loved with my heart and soul, and knew the feeling was mutual.

I felt like someone had taken my roots and replanted them, and now I was a rose that was allowed to bloom without being trampled on the ground.

I was the rose, and Luke was my sunshine, and Eve and Michael and Malaya and Ashton and even Calum were the soil in which I grounded myself. They had all helped me in some way or another, whether they knew it or not, and I couldn't be more thankful for any of them. Especially Luke.

"Did you know that one?" Luke asked, suddenly drawing me from my thoughts.

"I'm sorry. I kinda got a bit lost up here..." I admitted, tapping my head apologetically.

"It's quite alright. It happens," he laughed. "Anyway, that was a song by A Day to Remember. I think I've shown them to you before."

"I think you did. What was the song called?"

"If It Means a Lot to You. One of my favorites by them," he turned his head to face me.

"I think I've heard that one. Just in case I haven't, though, you should play it again," I suggested with a wink.

He smiled and kissed me softly before agreeing. I watched carefully as he began playing again, noting the way his eyebrows would come up a bit as he sang higher notes, and the veins in his neck stood out a bit more than usual. This boy, in all his broken glory, was beautiful. He was a beautiful mess that had hidden how incomplete he was. But then he found me, and I think that, in the act of making me whole, I made him while as well.

Together, we were complete.


	49. >Chapter Forty-Nine<

The only thing I could think about was what I was going to say as I walked into school on Monday.

Obviously I couldn't just say, "Oh yeah. I had a panic attack after my wonderful boyfriend took me to an amazing concert, then I cut off all my hair."

I mean, sure I could just say I got a haircut, but I think it would've been a bit sudden, especially considering how much everyone knew I loved my hair... Plus, I still hadn't gotten the time to go get it evened out, so it was still jagged and choppy.

I pulled open a door to the school and made my way toward my locker. I had my headphones in and my face turned downward to my phone as I tried to ignore the people around me. I made it to my locker a minute later, quickly unlocking it and retrieving my things.

A tap on my shoulder made me jump. I whirled around to find Eve, Malaya, and Calum behind me. Eve was giggling, probably because of how I reacted to her soft grab for my attention.

Pulling out my earbuds, I smiled at them. "Hi guys..."

"I have so many questions for you right now..." Malaya put a hand on her hip and raised an eyebrow. "We're you and Luke playing hoodie together on Friday? Were you doing bad things? If so what were those bad things? Was that you I saw at the Twenty One Pilots concert? Because I thought you couldn't get tickets... And, most importantly, where is your hair?" She sounded like an upset mother, which made me want to laugh.

"Yes we were together but my mom knew about it, no we weren't doing bad things, and yes I was at the concert because it was mine and Luke's anniversary so he got tickets. And as for my hair-" I was choked off my a sudden tight feeling in my throat. I couldn't do it. Not yet. Especially not with Calum here, as I still wasn't sure where we stood.

With that, Malaya started being a teenage fangirl and bounced up and down as she squealed about the show. Eve got in a word or two here and there, and Calum stood behind them, his eyes on his phone and his mouth shut the whole time.

The first bell rang and we went our separate ways, me to chemistry, and the rest of them to their respective classes. I dragged myself through the morning to lunch where I was anxious to see Michael for the first time today, which was strange as I usually saw him every morning.

I stopped at my locker to put away my morning class materials and exchange them for my end of the day things when I felt a tap on my shoulder.

"Hey Ev-" I began as I turned to find not Eve, but Kelsey. And Nina, and Annie, and the rest of the Bitch Squad, as Malaya called them. My voice died in my throat as Kelsey sneered at me, pushing her long blonde hair over her shoulder.

"So, _Kara_ , I love the new haircut. Did your druggee friend do it?" She taunted.

"No," I returned simply, spinning back around to finish getting my things. She had other ideas though.

"Look at me when I'm talking to you!" Kelsey's hand dug into my shoulder as she whipped me around, slamming my back against my locker door. My head hit the top of it, making me gasp in pain. "How dare you go after Luke, you little slút?" She stepped so close I could see her foundation wasn't totally blended.

I remained silent, gritting my teeth as I stood absolutely still. She growled with frustration and narrowed her eyes.

"If you don't break up with him so his sorry áss comes crawling back to me, so help me, I'll make it so you not only don't fit in here, but you won't fit in anywhere," she hissed. "You won't have anyone to sob to other than your mummy, and even she won't care."

"What's the point in talking so quietly Kelsey?" I asked defiantly.

"Wh-what?" She looked taken aback at my words.

"I said, why talk so quietly? I don't give a dámn. I love Luke and I know for a fact that you don't, so why would I give him back to you? And I know for a _fact_ that he loves me. He's told me a thousand times that he regrets every second he spent with you, so why would I send him back to hell, when he may have found someone who can treat him like he's in heaven?" She took a step back, mouth slightly agape as she struggled for words.

"Is it some huge secret? I know I'm a reject," I shrugged before seeing my chance. Shutting and locking my locker, I turned and walked away. I found Luke staring at me in awe near the cafeteria door and I made a show of reaching up to kiss him hello before turning to smile at Kelsey, who just watched in rage.

But now I wasn't scared of her. I wasn't worried about her "ruining my life" because I had Luke. I knew he'd be there for me if anything happened, and that was all I needed.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"I can't believe you seriously did that Kara!" Michael rattled on. "You really must be crazy. No one ever does that to Kelsey!"

"Well I might as well be no one then," I shrugged with a smile. "Doesn't seem too bad."

"She's gonna be bìtching about this for the next two months to the footballers..." Calum groaned, making everyone laugh.

"I don't get why you still hang around with that crowd," Malaya pointed out. "You seem to fit in pretty well with us, considering the fact that you're a _total_ fúckboy, of course..."

"Because they're my _teammates_ , and I don't appreciate being called a fúckboy. I haven't had a 'girl friend' since autumn formal..." He grumbled.

" _Riiiight_....." Eve laughed. Calum rolled his eyes with a sigh and went back to eating his sandwich.

"Well, I personally am proud and amazed that you did that. Especially defending me," Luke joined sweetly. His lips pressed against my temple and he whispered a "thank you" that was for my ears only. I nodded and leaned against his shoulder.

"Anytime," I breathed into his ear with a smile.


	50. >Chapter Fifty<

I sat across from mom at the dinner table that night at dinner. She had asked that we have dinner together, and I felt bad for wanting to decline so I agreed. She freaked out a bit about my hair at first, and now there was just silent tension between us.

"So... How was your day at school today?" She asked quietly, taking another bite of the chicken she had made.

I shrugged. "It was fine I guess. I stood up to this bìtch that everyone is terrified of. That felt pretty good..."

"I hope you were respectful about it though?"

I chuckled, shaking my head. "How am I supposed to be respectful when I get shoved against the lockers, told that unless I break up with Luke so she can have him back, otherwise she'll ruin my life, and get called a bunch of names?"

Mom sighed, setting down her fork and knife. She put her elbows on the table, pushing her fingers through her hair frustratedly. "Why do you never tell me about these things Kara? I can help, you know that right? I've been in the same position as you and I know how to deal with this kind of thing..."

"Mom, I don't talk to you about this stuff because I don't want you to have to worry about me on top of what you have to worry about with work and everything! I thought we went over this already," I sighed, crossing my arms over my chest.

"Kara, I don't think you understand. Work is a temporary thing tf or me. I'm going to retire eventually, but you?" She looked at me, tears brimming in her eyes. "I've only got one of you. Only one of you to last me the rest of my life. And I can't stand to let you just get hurt like this. You're my only child Kar. I am willing to be unemployed for the rest of my life if it means you're happy and well-cared for."

I sat there for a moment in silence as she leaned her head atop her forearms, which were now laying on the tabletop. I slowly moved around the table to wrap my arms around her shoulders, noticing the slight shake in her drake as she let out silent tears.

"It's okay if you want to cry mom. I won't think any differently of you, if that's what you're worried about."

With that, years of pent up emotions came flowing from my rock of a mother, the one true family member I had left. She cried into my shoulder eventually, her sobs quiet but violent. She cried for everything, for dad and for all the stuff I'd gone through and for herself for everything she had lost through her life.

Soon I was leading her upstairs to bed, letting her lean against my side for support. The torrent of emotions had left her drained of all energy, and as soon as she was in bed her breathing slowed to a steady rate.

Quietly exiting her room, I returned downstairs to clean up out mostly eaten dinner. I washed off all the plates and loaded the dishwasher before a faint buzz came from the table. My phone was lit up with a new text message.

Opening it, I found Luke's contact picture along with the text: _Are you still up?_

_Yeah. What's up?_

There was a moments pause. _Could we go to the park by the swing sets. It's a really nice night out and I don't think I'll be getting much sleep tonight..._

_Sure. I'll be there in a few :)_

Smiling to myself, I retrieved my keys from the table where they say and hurried out to my car, locking the front door behind me. I made my way to the park, and I was greeted by a soft breeze as I got out of the car. I heard a quiet squeaking coming from the swings and I turned to see Luke's silhouette swaying back and forth.

I walked over slowly, not wanting to disturb how peaceful the scene was. I sat in the swing beside him, memories of our first time here whispering in the back of my mind. The stories of his tattoos washed over me, his history and his struggles and my love all on his skin for me to know.

"What are we gonna do about my mum?" His voice was strained, like he was fighting tears as he spoke.

I thought for a moment. What _were_ we going to do? How was this going to go down? Was she going to like me? Was I going to mess everything up in front of her?

"I guess we'll just have to play it by ear..." I whispered.

"I hope you know that I don't care whether or not she likes you," he stated firmly, facing me. "You're my addiction at this point, and if she tries to make me leave you things won't end very well..."

I chuckled and closed my eyes. "Luke?" I asked after a few beats of quiet.

"Yeah Kara?"

"What's gonna happen to us when we graduate?"

He was silent then, long enough so that I opened my eyes to peer at him worriedly. "We'll probably end up apart but I don't want us to end. I don't ever want us to end. Whether that means we call or text or Skype, I will find a way to keep in touch."

"That's what I was thinking..." I gave a small laugh and ran a hand through my hair. "How am I already worrying about that? The school year is hardly half over and I'm contemplating what will happen after."

"It's not necessarily a bad thing Kara," he stated simply. "The only thing I know about what I want to do after school is that I want to be a musician. I'm not even thinking about college, just music. But I want you to do whatever makes you happy because that might not be what I want to do. I can't hold you back from your aspirations. Now, that's not to say that we'll have to break up since that's the last thing I want. It's just..." His voice faded, leaving what we both knew hanging in the silence between us.

"I hate thinking about the future." I looked at my feet, shifting around some wood chips with the toe of my shoe. "There are so many 'if's and 'hopefully' sand 'maybe's. It scares me sometimes to be honest."

"You can't worry about the inevitable, Kar. What's gonna happen will happen, but I'll be there for as long as you want me, and I'll try to be what you need when you need it." Luke's words sent shivers down my spine. I thought of what to say, unable to come up with anything as emotional as what he just said.

"Luke, I feel like I always rely on you to be my knight in shining armor, and it feels nice that I can do that. I know if I'm having a bad day I can even just look at you and it makes me so happy. But I you know that if anything is ever wrong with you, I'm going to be there for you as well, right? I don't want our support to be a one way street. If you have a stressful day or a nightmare and I'm not around you can always call, no matter what time it is. If you're in the area and want to just spend some time together I'll be up for whatever. If you ever need anything, I'll be here for you too."

He was quiet for a long time, and I was afraid I'd said something wrong. As I was about to ask if everything was alright, he spoke. "Do you really feel like you just rely on me for help?" His voice was soft and sounded a bit strained, as though he were fighting off tears.

"Kara, you should know by now what you've done for me. Sure, I've been there for you physically and emotionally when you've needed me. But most of my problems are in here," he began and I watched as he raised a finger to tap his head. "Every time I feel like I could break down, I think of you and it makes me forget what was going to destroy me. Whenever I remember the things I've done in the past, I remember you telling me that no matter what I've done you'll still love me. You fixed my mind, whereas I can only comfort you. You did what was probably the most difficult thing to do for anyone. You healed my past."

Tears stung at the backs of my eyes as I slowly stood and stepped over to stand before him. Placing my hands over his where they held the chains of the swing, I leaned down to kiss his cheek gently. I was surprised to find it was damp and as I pulled back I swiped my tongue over my lips, finding what I had expected.

Tears.

"Please don't cry Luke," I whispered. Placing my hands now I either side of his face, I ran my thumbs over his cheeks to get rid of the salty emotions there.

"I don't want to think about all this, but I know I'll have to eventually," he chuckled bitterly. "Time makes cowards of us all, doesn't it..."

He took one of my hands in his own before standing. Placing my hand over the place where his heart was, he tucked a strand of hair behind my ear. In the dim streetlight, I could just barely make out the small smile on his lips as he took a deep breath.

"Do you feel that?" He whispered after a long moment.

"Yes," I nodded. His heart thumped steadily in his chest, like the constant, soft rhythm of a song.

"It's yours. Now, and always. I don't want it if you won't accept it, so as long as I'm alive, I'll always love you. I'll always be yours for the taking, as long as you want me."

"Luke Hemmings..." I breathed not a beat later. "I will always want you."


	51. Epilogue

<Luke's POV>

I rolled the paintbrush between my forefinger and thumb, contemplating what I was going to paint. "Can I do something really cheesy?" I asked quietly as an idea popped into my head and a smile grew on my mouth.

"Sure," Kara laughed, a sound that I would hear for the rest of my life if I could. Nodding, I realized what my idea would entail, and I felt my face heat up. "What is it? You're blushing..."

"Well... I wanted to paint something on your shoulders..." I mumbled.

"Well you've seen me in a sports bra before, Luke. Why would that be embarrassing?" Her eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

"No, I meant I wanted to paint something in the same place I have my tattoo," I clarified.

"Oh..." Her cheeks reddened as she realized what that meant.

"If you don't want me to paint it there, I can do it somewhere els-"

"It's fine. I don't mind. I feel comfortable enough with you that I can have a bra on without the straps," she laughed.

"If you're fine with it, then I guess I'll paint on your back then," I chuckled and nodded.

"Alright then." Kara reached down and pulled the hem of her shirt up and over her head. I sucked in a small breath, holding it as she smiled up at me and sat down on her bed, facing away from me. She then slid the thin gray straps off her shoulders and made sure her hair was secured in a bun. "Go for it whenever," she cooed.

I took a deep breath and picked up the pallet she'd given me, along with a few tubes of extra paint. I situated myself behind her, and close enough to the edge of the bed that I could reach the cup of water sitting on her bedside table. Then I went to work.

Picking a yellow-orange paint, I started on her left shoulder. It took a little while, and there were many shivers on her part from the cold paint, but soon I'd finished the sun.

I followed suit then, painting each planet in order. When I finished about two hours later, most of the paint I'd gotten was gone and I was happy with the finished product. Granted, it was messier than what Kara had done on me. And instead of the planets starting on top of her shoulders and curving down in the middle, they started on the backs of her shoulders and sloped up in the center so that Mars and Jupiter were just below the nape of her neck. But all in all, I smiled at what I'd done.

"Finished," I murmured in her ear, kissing the base of her throat gently. I was careful to avoid the still-wet paint on her skin though.

"How did you sit through that while I was painting on you?" She let out a laugh. "It was so ticklish!!"

"Guess I'm just made of stronger stuff," I replied playfully. If it were up to me, I could've stayed with her like that for eternity. And no, it wasn't because she was practically exposed before me, though that was a bit distracting. But the feeling of this moment, the emotions that ran over our skin, transferred from one to the other like electricity, it was astonishing. Captivating.

I had never been more in love with anyone than I was right then.

Sitting there on her white comforter, I was at peace. The early twilight streamed in through her lace curtains and dappled her smooth, flawless skin, and I knew then that she was the girl I wanted to be with for the rest of my life. This was the girl who had taken my heart, cutting through thorn bushes and walking over glass to reach it. Then she had mended it, and placed it on a pedestal, one that only she could ever reach.

"Luke..." She breathed, turning her head so her cheek was pressed against my hair. My lips were still peppering her skin with soft kisses, and I felt goosebumps rise at the contact.

I wanted to treat her so much better than I'd ever be able to, but that doesn't mean I couldn't try to show her how much she means...

"I love you Kara," I mumbled against her shoulder.

"I know Luke. I love you too," she chuckled.

"No. You don't realize what you mean to me." I lifted my head, placing a hand on her cheek to turn her eyes toward me. "I would give you whatever you wanted if it were in my power. I would tear down a city for you. Hold up the sky, drain the oceans, anything you ask for or want, I will do my best to get it. I swear." Tears sprung to her eyes as she placed her forehead on mine, and I swallowed hard, trying to get rid of the lump in my throat.

"Luke, you know what I want? What I'll only ever want?" She whispered. I nodded and she finished her thought. "You. I only want you. And I think that's the only thing you can ever truly give me."

"Then take me. Take my heart and my soul and whatever else you want, because you're the only one who's ever really had a purpose for it. Your the only one who has gone after it."

And with that, she closed the gap between our lips, and though the contact was hardly even there, I'd never been so breathless.

Instead of letting her pull back, as I could tell she was going to, I wrapped an arm around her bare waist and pulled her onto my lap. She turned her body so it was facing mine, and placed her delicate hands on either side of my face.

I felt her smile against my mouth as she let her hands trail down my sides, coming to rest at my waist. I knew what she was going to do before she did it, and broke off to let her tug my shirt up and over my head. We both froze for a moment, realizing this was the farthest we'd gotten before. I gave her a questioning look as I tucked a stray piece of black hair behind her ear, to which she nodded slightly.

I smiled and kissed her again, letting my hands rest on her lower back. I could've cried, because this moment, no matter what I did to try and delay it, would end sooner or later, never to be repeated. The lighting would be different, or we'd be older than we are now, whatever the reason, this wouldn't happen again. So I tried to keep myself together and let it happen the way it was going to happen.

She pushed her fingers into my hair, whispering against my lips briefly. "Can you take a picture of the paint before it gets too messed up? I might need it for reference..."

I chuckled and nodded. She stood and grabbed her camera quickly before handing it to me and turning around. I turned it on, letting the autofocus clear the image of her back before pressing the button under my finger. There was a soft click before it displayed the image on the screen.

"Would you like to see it?" I murmured, kissing beneath her ear as she nodded. I placed the camera in her hand and watched as she looked at it for a long time, scrutinizing every detail of the artwork on her skin.

She inhaled deeply, turning to look at me with those bright hazel eyes of hers. She smiled delicately, the slight dimple in her left cheek showing just a bit.

"I'm going to keep this forever," she promised mischievously.


End file.
